Injury Stories

[IDontCare05]

Since the talk of Bob Kelley I wan't to start an Injury Dicussion Thread:


Were You Ever injured really bad? Tell your story....




My one experience was when I was about 6 or 7. I was with a friend of mine and we were on a make shift see-saw and he was jumping on it , which made the one side lift up, and as he was doing that, I walked in front and the board hit me in the jaw, and about three teeth came flying out, and blood was pooring out of my head. Not only was I missing teeth but $5,000 later because of braces and such.

[turdfrgsn]

Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian Delady, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark nearest man and then he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got... lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces. Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, bosun's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kid's top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks took the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

[Mike H]

Too much words in this very short thread already.

On July 5, 1992, when I was 9, I broke my arm really badly at sleepaway camp. My elbow joint was completely disjointed, my nerve got wrapped around and tangled in my artery, cutting off most blood circulation to fingers, and the nerve got caught in a chipped part of my bone. I was in traction for a month, stuck in a hospital bed, with a pin in my elbow keeping the bones in place. On Novemeber 11 (my birthday), I had an EMG, which is a test where they send electronic shocks through your body to test the nerves. A week later, I had surgery to fix my nerve. If the problem had been missed for another month, I would have lost my entire left arm (because of the blood circulation problem). I saved my arm, but I still have permanent nerve damage. I also have a big ass scar on my arm. Maybe I will post a pic of it later...

[d0uche_n0zzle]

Too many injuries to bother boring you all with the details.

[Farm Flufer]

Back in 92 I was filling in for someone at work (that called in sick) and ended up on a ladder (not something I usualy did at work). The ladder slipped and I put my left hand throu a plate glass window. My arm landed on a jagged piece of glass that was still in the frame. I had cut an arterie and some tendens. Almost bled to death and lost use of 3 of my fingers for almost 4 months.

[NikDaSchwugie]

I thought I could fly on a bike once.

A ditch full of rocks cured that idea quickly.

[IDontCare05]

I thought of another one:

When I was 8, I had to receive stitches in my chin because I thought I could lift 100 lbs on my dad's bar press. I was wrong, and slipped and a nice sharp metal piece went right through my chin and I received like 10 stitches.

[ASSBAG]

Off the top of my head

When I was 4 I fell onto a fireplace poker that went into my leg.
When I was 7 I wrecked my dirt bike and had the skin on my knee peeled off.
When I was 11 I fell off the hood of a car and got a huge blood clot on my head.
When I was 19 I broke my femur over my steering wheel and put my head thru the windshield (for not wearing my seat belt)
In 2003 I had a softball size section of skin removed from the back of my head.

[cableone12]

i was 4 and i was on swings, i jumped off my swing as the kid next to me was coming down(fast and hard) he hit me and i fell. y head landed on a medium sized rock and that resulted in a nasty gash. i think it got like 8 stitches.


btw i was wearing my superman outfit(with red cape ofcourse) that day, but i guess even superman can split his head open

[KneeKnee]

I got a paper cut on my tounge once...No kiddin!

[cableone12]

I thought I could fly on a bike once.


its not going to work unless E.T. is riding with you!!

[HerkyJerkyLiz]

broken nose 4 times
broken left arm 2 times
broken 4 toes atleast
broken/sprained a few fingers
tore ligaments in my foot
stitches above my right eye

and about a million situations ending with scrapes, bumps, bruises, road rash..

[Tossed Salad]

broken nose 4 times
broken left arm 2 times
broken 4 toes
broken/sprained a few fingers
tore ligaments in my foot
stitches above my right eye

and about a million situations ending with scrapes, bumps, bruises, road rash..

Wow Liz, your really into the rough sex huh? :action-sm

[askewcore]

I tore my ACL playing football my junior year. No one had to hold my hand though, or offer me an advil for that matter. It sucked, but compared to Ol' Liz Knievel it's not so bad.

[HerkyJerkyLiz]

i was a bit of a tomboy. played sports, played in the dirt, rode bikes, got into fights..

[ASSBAG]

Oh yea I died once but came back.....send me $5.00 and I'll tell you what to expect when you die :action-sm

[CallmeQtie]

I just got whiplash and a concussion on my lunch break cause I was driving and wasn't paying attention and I drove into the car in front of me and she wasn't moving. If I was wearing my seatbelt, I wouldn't be nearly as banged up as I am now. I wonder if the fact that I haven't slept in 4 days had anything to do with it? I refuse to go to th ER, I'm just gonna take some percocets and go home and chill.

[Tossed Salad]

I just got whiplash and a concussion on my lunch break cause I was driving and wasn't paying attention and I drove into the car in front of me and she wasn't moving. If I was wearing my seatbelt, I wouldn't be nearly as banged up as I am now. I wonder if the fact that I haven't slept in 4 days had anything to do with it? I refuse to go to th ER, I'm just gonna take some percocets and go home and chill.

That's a great idea, not going to the ER!! what if you really fucked something up, but won't find out 'till later in life?

[askewcore]

Yeah....I have whiplash too....now make with those percocets!

[LilEvilGrin]

Fell from a 5 1/2 foot retainer wall and landed on my shoulders and the back of my neck.. hit so hard , my chin left a bruise on my chest.. Paralized from neck down for for 4 days before i got feeling back.18 months of rehab. Doc said since i didnt tense up when i fell that my body was just in shock.... hmmm last line sounded like it could be a part of the DO's and DONT's for anal..... I Steeenk

[Jolie]

I fell off a folding chair whild hanging curtains once and got a concussion.

My husband ran into someone playing midnight capture the flag and broke his knee. But our team won, so thats okay.

[IDontCare05]

Since my friend isn't a Wackbag member I will tell his story:

He was playing dodgeball back in High School, and jumped very high to get out of the way, and as soon as he came down his knee basically tore right out from his skin. Bone shot right out from the body as did a lot of blood. He was in so much pain, and started swearing these weird sayings I have never heard of. And NO I did not hold his hand. But anyway he had to be rushed to the hospital and he told me before he got there they pushed the bone back into place. Ahhh. He would later be fine after months of physical therapy, pain killers, and a nice scar.

[XMScott]

Paradise Island 97

I was riding a jet ski with my friend. Helped this drunk guy on his jet ski 2 or 3 times, he was just all over the place

Doing about 30mph (like i remember) all i do remember is seeing something coming from the left, his jet ski hit the front of mine, rode up the hood and smacked me square in the face. I would have drowned if not for my best friend pulling me out of the water

About 40 titanium screws, 2 surgerys and surgical braces to fix my shifted teeth and now i look like............ http://photos.doublewidz.com/albums/userpics/10001/One_With_Dog.jpg

It was bad, my nose was flatten and to the left of my face, broke my jaw, cheek bones, and eye sockets

[Seth]

Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian Delady, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark nearest man and then he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got... lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces. Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, bosun's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kid's top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks took the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

I hope you didn't type that all up, but if you did, it was worth the effort cuz it sure made me laugh!

[IDontCare05]

I hope you didn't type that all up, but if you did, it was worth the effort cuz it sure made me laugh!


Yea that clever bastard :icon_mrgr ....It took till the mid-way through the first paragraph to realize what he was doing. Very funny indeed.

[stevethrower]

Got stabbed in the hand once... 4 stitches... well guess it is better then getting stabbed in the chest as the guy with the knife intended...

[IDontCare05]

Got stabbed in the hand once... 4 stitches... well guess it is better then getting stabbed in the chest as the guy with the knife intended...

You can't end that like that....What the hell made the guy do this?

[d0uche_n0zzle]

That's why you stab them in the throat. Just watch out for the spray back.

[ASSBAG]

That's why you stab them in the throat. Just watch out for the spray back.



....as they fall to the ground making that gurgle noise.

[Seth]

That clip of Dane Cook getting tripped up by Bob Kelly on the scooters looked so much like what happened to me as a pre-teen, except I was on a bike and I didn't break anything. A kid was telling me what "shake and break" was and "accidentally" did it- kicked my front tire with his back. I skidded 10 or so feet on my knee and got caught in the pedals.

My knee was ripped to such shreds that the doc said he'd give me stitches but there was nothing to stitch together. Instead he stuck the wound with needles of novocaine 13 times and then let me scrub out the gravel. I did too good of a job and paid dearly for it with the pain later. I still have a good sized scar.

[stevethrower]

You can't end that like that....What the hell made the guy do this?

It was over some ahem.... a type of purchase you make on a street corner... and not what Jimmy buys on street corners... basically bought my product... then buddy tried to rip me off (hoo hoo) for the rest of my cash... took a lunge at me with the knife blocked it with my hand... then I kicked him in the nuts... then the face... then ran like a scared bitch....

[Seth]

It was over some ahem.... a type of purchase you make on a street corner... and not what Jimmy buys on street corners... basically bought my product... buddy tried to rip me off (hoo hoo) for the rest of my cash... took a lunge at me with the knife blocked it with my hand... then I kicked him in the nuts... then the face... then ran like a scared bitch....
I don't believe being involved in a knife fight unarmed qualifies you for bitch-dom.

[stevethrower]

Funny thing I think there still is a pc of steel in the knuckle (perhaps the knife tip I dunno)... cuz I tend to know when the weather is changing.... oh since then always carried a knife... not a big one... just a folding buck knife.

And yet one more thing... thank God buddy did not know what he is doing... as he tried to stab me overhand...

[ASSBAG]

Funny thing I think there still is a pc of steel in the knuckle (perhaps the knife tip I dunno)... cuz I tend to know when the weather is changing....



Dude, you just reminded me what it's like on a cold day with metal in your bones....yikes.

[IDontCare05]

Funny thing I think there still is a pc of steel in the knuckle (perhaps the knife tip I dunno)... cuz I tend to know when the weather is changing.... oh since then always carried a knife... not a big one... just a folding buck knife.



Dam man that must of been scary for ya.( I realized I quoted the wrong quote...I meant to quote your story) Btw no one would consider you a bitch for doing what you did....especially being unarmed like Seth said.

[stevethrower]

Not the cold so much... like when a low pressure front moves in... my knucle feels ummm weird... oh and I also carry a 4 C cell Maglight in the car... which I tuned up a golfer once who cut me off... when I passed him on the shoulder... he followed me home... pulled into school parking lot... got out of car with flashlight... twanked him upside the head with it... got back into car... and drove home :)

And it still has his teeth marks on the end... tee hee

[Mike H]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v733/mjhauptman/scar1.jpg

This is my disgusting fat fucking left arm, with the scar (that is all one). I had to distort the lighting of the pic a little bit because the lighting was really bad, but if anything, it works worse in person. There was something like 35 stitches.

I know lots of you probably have much worse scars and I wanna see them. Nothing like a good freak show. :action-sm

[stevethrower]

Man my little knife wound scar stinks compaired to that... gaaahh

[T Brokenjaw]

I have a site for BOB.

http://www.mybrokenleg.com/

[d0uche_n0zzle]

Snap, crackle, POP!

That was the sound of my leg breaking.

Flashbacks from Bitch Kelly who sounds like he's in shock.

[IDontCare05]

I know lots of you probably have much worse scars and I wanna see them. Nothing like a good freak show. :action-sm



Yea that's a good idea. Let's see them people :icon_mrgr

[CallmeQtie]

That's a great idea, not going to the ER!! what if you really fucked something up, but won't find out 'till later in life?
It could happen, but I work in the hospital, and I didn't want to go to the ER where I know everyone. I guess its my own foolish pride, but I didn't want to go down there and have everyone asking me what happened when the accident was sooooooo completely my fault and was retarded. I drove really fast into a car that wasn't moving. They would have torn me to pieces down in the ER. I know, I'm an ass. Hopefully I don't have some kind of blood clot in my head or something, I'll just eat alot of M&Ms, that should take care of it :icon_lol:

[Taso]

Not really a devastating injury but when I was 16 I got my toe stuck in a trampoline spring. It ended up ripping off my toenail and i lost the tip off of my big toe.

[CallmeQtie]

I also drank too much one night and threw up so much I got what they call a Mallory-Weiss tear. Its where the esophogus and stomach tear appart from each other due to excessive pressure. I lost 2 1/2 pints of blood, and almost died. They went down my throat and reattached it with super glue or something. I thought it was weird when I started to throw up blood, I just never knew that you could throw up so hard to make two organs come appart from each other. It really sucked!

[ChrisH]

When I was about 12, I was at camp, and we took a fishing trip to the border of New Hampshire and Canada, very remote. Well, I was sitting on a picnic bench attached to the table, and on the table after a day of fishing, one of the counselors was making hot cocoa on a camping stove--big huge cauldron of boiling water. Some fucking jackass sat on the table, knocking over the boiling water on TO MY LAP!!!

Long story short, my thighs were badly burned (very bad 2nd degree burns, skin hanging off), a 45 minute drive to the hospital (b/c we were in such a rural area), but, for reasons still unknown to me today, my crotch area wasn't burned.

[Ballbuster1]

I had a finger cut off when I got too close to a radiator fan on a car.
Luckily, I saved it and it was reattached and after months of therapy
it works fine. It's a little thinner now, but with a skin graft it looks
ok and works almost as good as it was before the accident.

[turdfrgsn]

And it still has his teeth marks on the end... tee hee


you mean TEEF

still had the golfer's TEEF marks on the end

[turdfrgsn]

I hope you didn't type that all up, but if you did, it was worth the effort cuz it sure made me laugh!

cut n' paste, and ty

[ASSBAG]

I had a finger cut off when I got too close to a radiator fan on a car.
Luckily, I saved it and it was reattached and after months of therapy
it works fine. It's a little thinner now, but with a skin graft it looks
ok and works almost as good as it was before the accident.



Jesus, was the motor running 8,000 rpm or was the radiator fan gear drivin'

[kse 8585]

When I was about 12, me and my friends were playing hockey. Me and my friend were both going for the puck and he took a huge backhand swing and his stick blade went into my gums above my top two front teeth, I had to get a bunch of stiches to fix it up, it bled for days, and I got so high off of nitrous at the dentist, I guess it was worth it.

[Ballbuster1]

Jesus, was the motor running 8,000 rpm or was the radiator fan gear drivin'It was actually an electric fan on a Grand Am.
Those little plastic blades are really quite sharp,
as I found out.

[IDontCare05]

I also drank too much one night and threw up so much I got what they call a Mallory-Weiss tear. Its where the esophogus and stomach tear appart from each other due to excessive pressure. I lost 2 1/2 pints of blood, and almost died. They went down my throat and reattached it with super glue or something. I thought it was weird when I started to throw up blood, I just never knew that you could throw up so hard to make two organs come appart from each other. It really sucked!


Dam Qtie...your a lil party girl. I guess for that night a little too much.

[NikDaSchwugie]

When I was about 12, me and my friends were playing hockey. Me and my friend were both going for the puck and he took a huge backhand swing and his stick blade went into my gums above my top two front teeth, I had to get a bunch of stiches to fix it up, it bled for days, and I got so high off of nitrous at the dentist, I guess it was worth it.
That reminds me of another good story. I needed my wisdom teeth out, and luckily I found a pain study to pay me $200 to get them all taken out. (I had to stay there afterward for 2 hours and report how I felt on this new pain med.) Apparently my x-rays weren't very clear, and while I was under the gas they discovered what looked like my upper left wisdom tooth was not a tooth, but a half-formed cap. My REAL wisdom tooth was near my cheekbone.

I imagine the dentist shrugging, and saying, "I GOTTA get that tooth!"

I woke up to see the dentist on top of me with a mallet and a chisel in his hand. The gas was wearing off by the time he was hammering away so I got to stare at him, sure I was having a REALLY bad mental reaction to the gas, while he hammered away in my mouth.

Long story short, he chipped my cheekbone and ruptured one of my sinuses. I spent the next few days throwing up from the pain meds and making sure I stayed the hell away from pepper or dust or anything, because I wasn't allowed to sneeze for a week.

[Jolie]

I also drank too much one night

This reminds me of this time i was standing outside my apartment at a party making out with this girl I knew (and really couldn't stand but hey) and my roommate came out and reinded her of something from their past and she started laughing and lost her balance and ran into me but i was standing too close to the stairs and started t fall down the stairs and her arm was around me so she came with me. we landed about four steps from the bottom. my knee landing on her head broke the fall. we were both bruised, but that was really the extent of our injuries.

[IDontCare05]

I woke up to see the dentist on top of me with a mallet and a chisel in his hand. The gas was wearing off by the time he was hammering away so I got to stare at him, sure I was having a REALLY bad mental reaction to the gas, while he hammered away in my mouth.

Long story short, he chipped my cheekbone and ruptured one of my sinuses. I spent the next few days throwing up from the pain meds and making sure I stayed the hell away from pepper or dust or anything, because I wasn't allowed to sneeze for a week.



When I read your story...I cringed and my mouth started to hurt.

[Mike H]

Like I said in my previous account, after I broke my arm, I had a pin in my elbow holding the bones in place (otherwise, my joint would have been non-existent). After I got out of traction for month, I was put in a cast and the pin remained in my elbow because it had not fully healed. I had decided that I wanted to go back to camp for the rest of the summer, because I did not want my entire summer to be ruined altogether. One day, I was making my bed in the bunk, and I got up from being on one knee and the pin sticking out of my elbow smacked right against the metal bed frame. At that point, I was in the most pain I had ever been in in my entire life. I felt the bones in my elbow come out of place. I was rushed to the doctor's office and after he looked at my X-Ray for about three and a half seconds, he decided that the pin had to come out and it could not wait another minute. I will never forget this for the rest of my life.... he tells me to close my eyes and hold my breath. At this point, I had no idea what the fuck he was going to do, but hearing a doctor say that to you is not the most pleasant thing in the world. Anyways, I follow the instructions, and he grabs the end of the pin and literally tugs the fucking thing right out of my arm. Imagine a screw that was probaby about one inch around and maybe three inches into my arm, complete with the rings that a normal screw would have on the bottom going up. I felt every single ridge scrape against my bones and rip out through the skin as he tore the thing right out my elbow. Now THAT was the most pain I have ever experienced in my entire life. I still cringe just thinking about it.

[IDontCare05]

Imagine a screw that was probaby about one inch around and maybe three inches into my arm, complete with the rings that a normal screw would have on the bottom going up. I felt every single ridge scrape against my bones and rip out through the skin as he tore the thing right out my elbow. Now THAT was the most pain I have ever experienced in my entire life. I still cringe just thinking about it.



Ahhh. Dam man that must of sucked ass. I don't even want to imagine how that felt, after how you desribed it. I probably would of attacked the doctor after he did that.

[Mike H]

Ahhh. Dam man that must of sucked ass. I don't even want to imagine how that felt, after how you desribed it. I probably would of attacked the doctor after he did that.

At the time, perhaps. But in retrospect, he was one of two doctors that are directly responsible for me still having two arms, so I feel like I owe him more than I could probably ever repay him. My family has actually kept in touch with him over the years and I have been to his home a couple of times in Pottstown, PA. You should see this guy's house!!!

[THE FEZ MAN]

It was actually an electric fan on a Grand Am.
Those little plastic blades are really quite sharp,
as I found out.

I got bit by a ford escort with an electric fan that decided to come on all by its self one day. I deserved it, I was checking to see if the fan was turning on and had the car running for just long enough to get it hot, but not enough to kick the fan on, needless to say, the car sat and heat sank for about 5 minuets till the fan decided to kick in, luckily my hand was in the fan before it turned on so it didn’t really have time to get wound up and cause serious damage. For the record some of my worst cuts in the body shop have come from broken or breaking hard plastic parts.

My latest stupid injury was falling off a horse while getting on. and causing an avulsion fracture of my right ankle. I had my buddy tape it up with an old sock and duct tape and got right back on the horse (after punching the horse) If I hadn’t I would have gotten my balls busted forever. that’s another one, I had an cyst growing on my left nut that I had to have cut off, because it was bigger than my balls, that was a little tender for a couple of weeks I had a 1 ½ gash on the bottom of my sack I still have a scar but its hard to see because of all the wrinkles on my bag

[Sinn Fein]

Ok... I got some...

At approximately age 2, I learned how to unlock the basement door. I promptly fell down the basement stairs, and went over the side 1/2 way down landing on the concrete floor. I broke my collar bone on both sides. I feel this injury to this day almost 33 years later, depending on the weather.

At age 9 I was building a treehouse with some friends. What we had together fell out of the tree and landed on my face because I was standing underneath it at the time watching my friend nailing it together.. I had a minor concussion and had to get a butterfly stitch in my forehead.

At age 17, I broke my left ankle in gym class playing basketball. I went up for a rebound and got bumped as I came down. I landed wrong and heard my ankle snap.

At age 23 I broke my right ankle in a drunken stupor. I went to a party hosted by one of my coworkers at the time. There was no place to park there so I drove to my parents house and parked there. It was just a short walk through a field to the house where the party was. Well, I got shit-faced. Like a tool, I rejected offers for a ride home. I walked to my parents house and fell into a 4-foot washout ravine in this field. I heard my ankle snap 2x. I was so drunk I really didn't feel it. I crawled back to my car and drove home. I do not remember the ride, it was perhaps the stupidest thing I ever did. I fell into bed, still dressed in my muddy clothes. I woke up 2 hours later screaming bloody murder. Apparently the alcohol had worn off and the pain moved right in. I went to the emergency room and found out I had a double fracture.

[NikDaSchwugie]

At the time, perhaps. But in retrospect, he was one of two doctors that are directly responsible for me still having two arms, so I feel like I owe him more than I could probably ever repay him. My family has actually kept in touch with him over the years and I have been to his home a couple of times in Pottstown, PA. You should see this guy's house!!!
Does he have your screw in a jar, preserved in alcohol with a tiny midge of blood?

[click]

I'm in my thirties and never had a broken bone. No chickenpox or anything.
I had stitches once. I did some stupid shit too. I'm doomed now.

[stevethrower]

K me being stabbed... shit I am a pussy:)

[stevethrower]

you mean TEEF

still had the golfer's TEEF marks on the end

You are correct sir...:)

And sorry for fighting dirty... cuz in Canada damn near imposible to get a CCW... so Mr Flashlight has helped me out lots:)

[IDontCare05]

At the time, perhaps. But in retrospect, he was one of two doctors that are directly responsible for me still having two arms, so I feel like I owe him more than I could probably ever repay him. My family has actually kept in touch with him over the years and I have been to his home a couple of times in Pottstown, PA. You should see this guy's house!!!

Yea they do wonderful things those doctors. You definitly have to respect what they do and how they do it under pressure.

[click]

I forget he's a Canadian. He seems so cool. :icon_mrgr

[stevethrower]

I forget he's a Canadian. He seems so cool. :icon_mrgr

Thanks I think :action-sm

Yup getting a CCW is damn near impossible here for a civilian... less you are connected... I think there are only 10 (used to be 11) people here who have them... one being Pierre Trudeau... (he died a few years ago... errr was Prime Minister here)... last guy in the news was a city councilor who shot ahem newfie... who was robbing his bakery 2 or three years ago...

Please do not get me started if you want to have a hand gun here... bleech

[Sinn Fein]

Don't fret stevethrower, the People's Republic of New Jersey is just as bad...

[fandango86]

I've got a couple:

When I was 8 a beverage company was running a promotion where you had to peel the inside liner out of the bottle cap. (Twist off, not pop-top). I couldn't get it out, so tried to peel it out with first a spoon, then a fork, then a butter knife, then a...steak knife. I don't remember anything after that, but I'm now legally blind in my right eye. And no, I don't have a patch or a glass eye!

I was hopping over a chain link fence when I was about 10 and my leg caught on a piece of metal sticking out of the top of the fence. My body flipped against the back side of the fence and I was stuck there by my leg. My brother had to come and unstick my leg while some of my friends tried to hold me up so I didn't fall too hard on the ground.

This one's for the ladies...When I was 16 I went to a picnic in a big public park. We were playing softball and I knelt down on the ground for some reason. Unfortunately there was the bottom only of a broken glass Coke bottle, and I knelt right on it, creating a circular gash in my knee that eventually required 30+ stitches. I hobbled about 500 feet over to a nearby picnic table, and almost passed out from the pain and loss of blood. A 13 year old girl came over to see if I was alright, I looked up at her and fell instantly in love. Then I passed out. 15 years later we're happily married and celebrate our 5th anniversary later this month.

[IDontCare05]

When I was 16 I went to a picnic in a big public park. We were playing softball and I knelt down on the ground for some reason. Unfortunately there was the bottom only of a broken glass Coke bottle, and I knelt right on it, creating a circular gash in my knee that eventually required 30+ stitches. I hobbled about 500 feet over to a nearby picnic table, and almost passed out from the pain and loss of blood. A 13 year old girl came over to see if I was alright, I looked up at her and fell instantly in love. Then I passed out. 15 years later we're happily married and celebrate our 5th anniversary later this month.



Wow...So that was the best injury of your live then. It was I guess fate that you would hurt yourself and meet this girl. Lucky you....You get hurt but get the girl.

[stabmasterarson]

pretty much my whole life was injury-free, save for the occasional sprain/busted finger/toe. And then in '02, I was working as a structural ironwoker, on a high-rise...30-ish feet up, and I was knocked off an I-beam by crane hook, being operated by a guy whacked-out on meth, who had been up for a week.

I fell the whole way onto concrete, fractured my skull, broken collarbone, broke three ribs..which then punctured my lung, fractured vertibre in my neck, and a few other small fractures. Splat!..like a bug. Comatose for about three weeks, prognosis was that I wouldn't walk, and would likely not function anywhere near my normal level.

So I woke up with a headache, real dizzy, my speech was slurred for a couple weeks, sore as shit...but other than that just fine. Fast-forward to now, aside from the occasional headache, I'm no worse for wear. I ride my chopper, skateboard every now and then..the only things I can't do are walk on a beam(who cares) and box competitively. No big deal.

To be honest, it worked out allright for me
http://img207.echo.cx/img207/9518/picture7zm.jpg

[ASSBAG]

To be honest, it worked out allright for me
http://img207.echo.cx/img207/9518/picture7zm.jpg



Hi friend :action-sm

[stabmasterarson]

haha

I hear that alot these days

[ASSBAG]

haha

I hear that alot these days


Hell, I'd even F your attorney for his cut.

[stabmasterarson]

Like I said in my previous account, after I broke my arm, I had a pin in my elbow holding the bones in place (otherwise, my joint would have been non-existent). After I got out of traction for month, I was put in a cast and the pin remained in my elbow because it had not fully healed. I had decided that I wanted to go back to camp for the rest of the summer, because I did not want my entire summer to be ruined altogether. One day, I was making my bed in the bunk, and I got up from being on one knee and the pin sticking out of my elbow smacked right against the metal bed frame. At that point, I was in the most pain I had ever been in in my entire life. I felt the bones in my elbow come out of place. I was rushed to the doctor's office and after he looked at my X-Ray for about three and a half seconds, he decided that the pin had to come out and it could not wait another minute. I will never forget this for the rest of my life.... he tells me to close my eyes and hold my breath. At this point, I had no idea what the fuck he was going to do, but hearing a doctor say that to you is not the most pleasant thing in the world. Anyways, I follow the instructions, and he grabs the end of the pin and literally tugs the fucking thing right out of my arm. Imagine a screw that was probaby about one inch around and maybe three inches into my arm, complete with the rings that a normal screw would have on the bottom going up. I felt every single ridge scrape against my bones and rip out through the skin as he tore the thing right out my elbow. Now THAT was the most pain I have ever experienced in my entire life. I still cringe just thinking about it.


dude, that was hard to read

[Big Log]

When I was like 1 or so, I found a nice thing to chew on... a lamp cord. My newly formed sharp ass toofs went right thru the plastic, and lit my ass up. I had half a mouth for a few years, due to the fact that it was burned together and looked lovely. Had some plastic surgery done, and you can't even tell anymore.

[KneeKnee]

I also clipped my toenail too low once...

[IDontCare05]

I also clipped my toenail too low once...


That's an injury?? :rotf: :action-sm

[Mike H]

dude, that was hard to read

It wasn't easy to experience either! :action-sm

[CaraC]

4 days before my 6th birthday... got the corner of my mouth caught on a storm door handle... ended up with my cheek rippped open ALL the way though my skin about an inch from the corner of my lip (12 stitches) and 90 stitches on the inside of my cheek all the way back to my jaw bone

[stabmasterarson]

4 days before my 6th birthday... got the corner of my mouth caught on a storm door handle... ended up with my cheek rippped open ALL the way though my skin about an inch from the corner of my lip (12 stitches) and 90 stitches on the inside of my cheek all the way back to my jaw bone


jesus



:icon_eek:

[kid afrika]

Wow! You fuckers are really accident proned. Or weak.

At 33, I've never had a broken bone, bar a finger or two.

Got my first bloody nose last year and it wasn't from any impact, just dry air, I guess.

I've never had...

A stitch

A headache (except for champagne hangovers)

A cast

The biggest scar I have is from being burned when I was about 14. My friend thought it was a good idea to smoke while he was using paint thinner. My throwing a flaming bowl of paint thinner out the door resulting in 3rd degree burns on my arm. Pretty much invisible at this point, though.

Other than that, I have some road rash scars from a street bike accident a few years ago. Even those are hardly worth mentioning though.

I guess I should go count my blessings now.

[Mike H]

Doctors once glued my eye shut!!!

I was in that crazy country called Canada in the summer of (I think) 97 on a trip with my travel camp (camp and me apparently didn't mix well) and my jackass of a friend, Erik, chucked the circlular lid to the ice box in the hotel room. It riccoched (sp?) off the ceiling and sliced me right between the eyes. I was taken the hopsital in Montreal for a couple of stitches, but they used medical glue instead (at the time, this procedure was unheard of in the States). Anyways, no big deal... I was not in any pain, it was just that the bleeding would not stop. So, they are applying the glue and the beautiful young Jewish female doctor told me to close my eyes and was told, "Don't worry, it won't drip." Seconds later, I hear "Uh oh, it dripped!" Sure enough, I could not open my right eye because they glued the fucking thing shut!!! I totally began to freak out and was told not to worry. The male nurse put one hand on my eye lid and the other hand under my eye and pried it open. It was painful for about a second, but wasn't really a big deal. It makes for a good story though.

[stabmasterarson]

Wow! You fuckers are really accident proned. Or weak.

At 33, I've never had a broken bone, bar a finger or two.

Got my first bloody nose last year and it wasn't from any impact, just dry air, I guess.

I've never had...

A stitch

A headache (except for champagne hangovers)

A cast

The biggest scar I have is from being burned when I was about 14. My friend thought it was a good idea to smoke while he was using paint thinner. My throwing a flaming bowl of paint thinner out the door resulting in 3rd degree burns on my arm. Pretty much invisible at this point, though.

Other than that, I have some road rash scars from a street bike accident a few years ago. Even those are hardly worth mentioning though.

I guess I should go count my blessings now.

http://img205.echo.cx/img205/9358/poster12lu.jpg

[IDontCare05]

Wow! You fuckers are really accident proned. Or weak.

At 33, I've never had a broken bone, bar a finger or two.

Got my first bloody nose last year and it wasn't from any impact, just dry air, I guess.

I've never had...

A stitch

A headache (except for champagne hangovers)

A cast

The biggest scar I have is from being burned when I was about 14. My friend thought it was a good idea to smoke while he was using paint thinner. My throwing a flaming bowl of paint thinner out the door resulting in 3rd degree burns on my arm. Pretty much invisible at this point, though.

Other than that, I have some road rash scars from a street bike accident a few years ago. Even those are hardly worth mentioning though.

I guess I should go count my blessings now.



You also just jinxed yourself too....watch out :icon_eek:

* I also agree with stab...your a lucky guy

[Hummercash]

Doctors once glued my eye shut!!!

I was in that crazy country called Canada in the summer of (I think) 97 on a trip with my travel camp (camp and me apparently didn't mix well) and my jackass of a friend, Erik, chucked the circlular lid to the ice box in the hotel room. It riccoched (sp?) off the ceiling and sliced me right between the eyes. I was taken the hopsital in Montreal for a couple of stitches, but they used medical glue instead (at the time, this procedure was unheard of in the States). Anyways, no big deal... I was not in any pain, it was just that the bleeding would not stop. So, they are applying the glue and the beautiful young Jewish female doctor told me to close my eyes and was told, "Don't worry, it won't drip." Seconds later, I hear "Uh oh, it dripped!" Sure enough, I could not open my right eye because they glued the fucking thing shut!!! I totally began to freak out and was told not to worry. The male nurse put one hand on my eye lid and the other hand under my eye and pried it open. It was painful for about a second, but wasn't really a big deal. It makes for a good story though.
no it doesn't.

[Danny Knuckles]

OK i think i have one.

Iwas driving my momcylce down the road after my birfday and i was having a good time and the next thing i know i was hearing christmas music. I lost my front toof but thats the lesser of the problems. I fractured my c1 c2 veterbrae and came millimeters away from being paralyzed for the rest of my life. That wasnt the worst part though, i had to wear one of these fukin halos. If you arent familiar with these, they screw into your head at four postions so it prevents from your neck turning. I had to wear this freakin thing for 7 months (the worst 8 months of my 35 yr old life). I do not wish this on my worst enemy thats how bad it sucks to wear one of these freakin things. Was in the hospital for a month than went to Kessler rehab(where chris reeve went) for 2 weeks. If you are ever injured i recommmend kessler for every1.

Than after months of wearing this thing i cotracted brain seizures from the screws being tightned to far into my brain, so i was admitted to the hospital for another 2 weeks. Than i was realeased with a pic line in my arm to medicate myself intraveniously at home. After 2 months of the pic line my arm blew up 3 times the size from a blood clot that formed from the pic line. So it was back to the hospital for another two weeeks to watch and treat my blood clot. I left the hospital afer 2 months of total hospital time than had to take a blood thinner medicine for 8 months to thin my blood to clear the clot. After TWO YEARS i was back to normal.

The moral of the story "DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE" LEARN FROM MY STUPID ASS MISTAKES.

[KneeKnee]

That's an injury?? :rotf: :action-sm


I guess you never had to walk around missing a toenail before...

I really did that, but I know it pales in comparison to some of the other stories posted on here. But most of my injuries are boring.

Broken nose, broken fingers, hand, razorblade cut on finger, hit in face with a 40, droped on neck by an X girlfriend (wasnt an X at the time)

[stabmasterarson]

momcylce


:icon_eek:

[IDontCare05]

I guess you never had to walk around missing a toenail before...

I really did that, but I know it pales in comparison to some of the other stories posted on here. But most of my injuries are boring.

Broken nose, broken fingers, hand, razorblade cut on finger, hit in face with a 40, droped on neck by an X girlfriend (wasnt an X at the time)


I know man I'm just messin with ya :action-sm ....It sucks when you cut it too short or sometimes completely off. I know exactly what you mean.

[CaraC]

jesus



:icon_eek:
yeah no shit... lol... I remember it like it was yesterday bc it was scary as hell... but... I barely have a scar... the surgeon was amazing and plus my mom put vitamin E on it about 100 times a day for months after it happened... I still swear by vitamin E!!!!

[dog_liverbuster]

a buddy of mine is an EMT with the local volunteer fire company. once when we were hanging out he got called out to the scene of an accident where a woman lost control of her car (I think it was an acura or something like that) and crashed into one of those decorative brick walls they put up around corners. she bounced off a small treee smashing the moon roof on the car down on top of her head, and then smashed the wall really good. i guess in the process a huge chunk of glass had cut part of the back of her head almost off and when they went to get her body out he went to grab the back of her head to support her neck and grabbed a hand full of exposed brain. :icon_eek:

I also had gastric bypass surgery in october. i guess my heart stopped in the process and i was dead for a few minutes. :icon_evil

[dog_liverbuster]

i was camping on some state land and we were partying our asses off. i got really drunk and tried to feed a squirl a Cheeto. the little fucker bit me and i had to get rabies shots. those things fucking suck. :icon_evil

[IDontCare05]

How could one do that to you....they are so loveable as bernie would say..... :icon_roll


http://img95.echo.cx/img95/6440/untitled12mo.png (http://www.imageshack.us)

[stevethrower]

i was camping on some state land and we were partying our asses off. i got really drunk and tried to feed a squirl a Cheeto. the little fucker bit me and i had to get rabies shots. those things fucking suck. :icon_evil

Did he go for you nuts?

Heh..mmphhhfff, uh...ha...whehhh.

[weakside]

I used to have a rock collection when I was 6 or so. Anyway, I had collected at least a hundred or so rocks and put them in a big tub that was on top of my closet. Being both small and stupid I tried to get them down one day and the entire container of rocks rained down on my little head. I have never before or since seen as much blood as I did than day. Picture the pig’s blood scene from Carrie.

[THE FEZ MAN]

i was camping on some state land and we were partying our asses off. i got really drunk and tried to feed a squirl a Cheeto. the little fucker bit me and i had to get rabies shots. those things fucking suck. :icon_evil

rodents dont carry rabies according to my Vet.

[IDontCare05]

rodents dont carry rabies according to my Vet.


What animals do I need to be careful of possibly having rabies?

Wild animals carry the most risk of being rabid. Strictly speaking, any fur bearing mammal can carry rabies, however certain wild animals are the most common carriers. Skunks (polecats), raccoons (coons), foxes, and bats are the most common carriers. Beavers, rabbits, chipmunks, squirrels, rats and mice are less notorious however are fully capable of being rabid. Dogs, cats and cattle are the domestic animals that are at highest risk. In rare instances, bats have been known to pass the virus without direct contact.


It does say possibly but still.
http://www.stemrich.com/hci/rabies/faq.htm#animals

[dog_liverbuster]

rodents don't carry rabies according to my Vet.

your vet is out of his mind. if a raccoon or a opossum (both rodents) can have it, so can any animal that comes in contact with it. :icon_evil

[IDontCare05]

Another injury I have thought of was when I was 18. Senior year during gym playing volleyball....yes freakin volleyball..... I made a dive to save the game and fell on my knee. The knee started to fill up with fluid and I couldn't move it for two weeks. I also felt cracks in my knee everytime it moves. Loud and painfull cracks and all because I was an idiot trying to make a stupid dive on a freakin hard ass floor.

[Perch1019]

January 1996 - I was a freshman in highschool so I was 14. It was a monday night and my brother who is 2 years younger and I were wrestling and just messing around in the kitchen. I had just dropped the DDT on him and then proceeded to whip him with the strap to my bookbag that ripped off that day. He got up and I made a run for it. He grabbed the big pasta ladel out of the bowl and chucked it across the kitchen at me. I slammed the door behind me, spun around and WHAP! right in the fuckin eye. He had no idea it hit me so when I was on the ground screaming in horror, he walked in laughing and saw blood pouring from my eye socket. My eyeball was rolled back completly and it was bright red. Spent the night in the ER since there was a blizzard and the doctor couldnt make it til the morning. I cant remember exactly what it was but my eyeball was bloodshot for about a month. I was blind for like 2 weeks of it, had to sleep sitting up for 3 needed to wake up every hour and put drops in it. Cool part was I missed school for the first 3 weeks but I couldnt play hockey for about 2 months. Missed half the season. Since I couldnt do anything all day but sit up and watch TV and movies, my brother (who was 12 at the time) would get one of his older friends to get him pot and brought me dime back every couple of days. The doctor asked me if I smoked pot during one of my later visits because he didnt expect me to regain my vision 100% like I did. I lied but you could tell he didnt believe me.

[THE FEZ MAN]

An opossum is a marsupial http://kaweahoaks.com/html/opossum.htm (http://kaweahoaks.com/html/opossum.htm) and the raccoon http://www.nhptv.org/natureworks/raccoon.htm (http://www.nhptv.org/natureworks/raccoon.htm) is a distant cousin of both the bear and dog NEITHER are rodents

I may have told this story, I don’t remember, I own two large Weimaraner hunting dogs which I extensively hunt in PA, NJ and DE, they will kill almost any game animal if given the chance including cats.

So I’m working in my back yard around dusk with my 4year old son when I hear a tremendous racket coming from my front yard, quite frankly I thought someone was skinning a cat alive while my dogs barked and yelped at the show. As I go to investigate, I see something smallish, about the size of a large gray cat, running across my yard to the nearest tree with Doc & Duncan right on its tail, when it jumps up into the tree Doc grabs it out of the air and goes tumbling into a small ditch, a swale really, in my yard temporally blocking my view. At this point the noise coming from the confrontation has gotten the attention of most of my yuppie asshole neighbors. I dash over, to order Doc to let go, of what I was hoping, was my neighbors cat when I realize, that it aint no cat, it’s a coon (the four legged variety, Doc don’t like the two legged ones much either but that’s another “why I own large German hunting dogs“ story) upon realizing the gravity of the situation I quickly decide that this confrontation must be ended immediately. So I run into my home and grab my trusty Glock 19 and blast the little screaming piece of shit right out of Doc’s mouth, I can still close my eyes and see Doc’s ears flying back from the muzzle blast. Yes, the neighbors watched the whole thing go down, after putting two rounds into the lil’ critter the dogs decided to make sure he was dead by grabbing him and shaking the shit out of it while it was still bleeding spraying blood all over me and themselves. I called quite a few people to find out what to do, the State Police told me to call animal control and animal control told me to call my vet, whom I’m on a first name basis with, after a long discussion and a quick lesson on rabies, and other blood borne pathogens we came to the conclusion that a through scrubbing with a 10% bleach and water solution of all effected areas (including the dogs mouth’s and a good chunk of me) should be sufficient to prevent infection they were bitten I was not .

So to make a long story short, yes you can get rabies from a squirrel, but licking a rock with bat shit on it can give it to you also. The next time you go camping, put a film canister (or other suitable air tight container) full of dry chlorine, I like to use shock for a pool, into your first aid kit. It comes in really handy for lots of stuff.

Oh and make sure to kill the fucking squirrel that bites you, cut off his head, leaving most of the brain stem intact, and save it in your cooler, for a necropsy, so after you go threw all the rabies shots and endless worrying, you can find out the squirrel just liked the taste of the cheeze on your finger.

[TaZMaNiaK]

rodents dont carry rabies according to my Vet.


That's bullshit. Any warm-blooded animal can contract and transmit rabies. Granted, you are more likely to get the plague than rabies from a rodent, but it is still possible.


Age 3: Fell off a 7 foot retaining wall, knocked out top 2 front teeth, fractured skull.

Age 10: Hit a ditch riding a dirtbike, flew over the handlebars and cracked my kneecap when I landed.

Age 12: Got in a fight, knocked the shit out of the other kid, but I got a concussion from the suckerpunch that started it.

Age 15: Took a bad jump on a quad, got thrown off and crushed my wrist on the landing.

Since then, nothing major, aside from sprained fingers and ankles and crap like that.. Knock wood..

[IDontCare05]

I love your sig Taz.... :xyxthumbs

[LoG]

A couple of years ago I was riding my Mountain bike back and forth to work for fun and exercise. I was the last one to leave the building and I hopped on my bike and starting riding on the sidewalk towards the parking lot. I had peddled hard five or six times quickly accelerating and jumped my bike off the curb into the parking lot. As me and my bike caught air my quick release front rim detached and kept rolling on the ground in front of me. I didn't have any time to react as the front fork dug into the pavement and launched straight over the handle bars. My elbow helped break my fall and save my skull but I broke it right through the joint as I slammed headfirst into the asphalt. The worst part is, as I laid on the pavement under my bike in pain a little girl who had seen the whole thing just kept riding around the building in circles staring at me. She didn't me if I was okay, she didn't call 911. She just kept doing laps and rubbernecking. I didn't realize my elbow was broken until I tried to pick up my bike. *snap crackle crunch* was the sound it made. So that sucked.