There's Coons In My Neighborhood

[whoisisthis]

so for like the fifth night in a row, I was woken up by my two shepherd dogs treeing these two freakishly gigantic racoons.

anyone here know any good way to keep these fucking things off my property? There's nothing that they can get into(trash, dog food, vegtable graden, ect.), so I think they do it just to torment me. My neighbors are too close, otherwise I'd just shoot them. Any help appreciated.



:icon_mad: :icon_eek:

[generoso]

Can always get those humane traps..once you trap tham take them for a drive about 5 miles away...

[whoisisthis]

ahh, traps.. good call. I'm gonna have to do a search on those, thanks



I aslo don't want my dogs getting to these monsters. I'm not kidding you when I say that these things are huge. Scary huge.

thay could surely do some serious damage to my dogs, if they got into it. It'd have to be like a cage trap or something


I don't know...

[Seth]

I saw one last night that was the size of a small to medium dog. Like a Boxer at about a year old. It was SO fat!

[Ballbuster1]

Be really careful with those fuckers. They may have rabies. If you
know who your local animal control official is, you might want to
contact him/her about this.

[tar_baby]

did you try fried chicken and malt liquor?

[Myhairygrundle]

Line the perimeter of your yard with textbooks. Should keep em out.

Seriously though,

Home depot carries large animal traps. We have this problem in southeast Texas quite a bit. Mix dry dog food with the peanut butter and place it on a paper plate in the trap at night. Next morning, your trap will have a new resident. Put a blanket or large towel over the trap. Take him at least 5 miles away and let him go free.

If you decide to kill the poor bastard, I will make a coon-skin cap for you.

[Chimpo]

Rage in the Cage... until you drop the cage in a trash can full of New Orleans water.


Cage goes in the water...

Coons in the water...

Our coons.

[beenhere47yeers]

bow and arrow is silent and wont travel far, but has enough power to kill a moose. dont drop those verman anywere kill em.

[invisible76]

best thing to do is dump a bunch of garbage in the yard of whatever neighbor pisses you off the most. They'll still be in your neighborhood, but they'll congregate at his house then they're HIS problem.

[A giiiiiiiiiirl]

If you decide to kill the poor bastard, I will make a coon-skin cap for you.

aw don't kill them!!!! you mean animal killers. :rolleyes:

[d0uche_n0zzle]

Kill them, they spread rabies and fuck up peoples pets.

[Glenn Dandy]

Hang one in the front yard imtold. Tanks Far Notin!

Holy Shit! I didnt know drunk Animal house girl was Maggie from Caddyshack!
http://www.mrskin.com/data/star/00/06/85/biopic1_965.jpg

[BCH]

aw don't kill them!!!! you mean animal killers. :rolleyes:

You go over to whoisisthis' house and lure them away with your flute then. Raccoons are nasty I'd kill 'em. My gun expert boss says use .22 bolt action rifle with .22 Shorts. Sound = Less than firecracker. You must hit them in the head though. He put 3 slugs from his .45 ACP 1911 model into one once and it climbed down from the tree and ran away.

[whoisisthis]

Line the perimeter of your yard with textbooks. Should keep em out.

Seriously though,

Home depot carries large animal traps. We have this problem in southeast Texas quite a bit. Mix dry dog food with the peanut butter and place it on a paper plate in the trap at night. Next morning, your trap will have a new resident. Put a blanket or large towel over the trap. Take him at least 5 miles away and let him go free.

If you decide to kill the poor bastard, I will make a coon-skin cap for you.

do these traps stay on the ground? These things stay in the trees..if they got onto the ground then my dogs would get at them. No good.


I like this idea though..I think I'll modify the trap so it's in the branches of this big oak tree they like to hang out in.

I have no problem killing these things. There's nothing cute about them, esecially when they hiss at you and bare their big as teeth. *shudders*


and I like Glen's idea. Hang it's corpse from a tree as a warning to other coons.

[whoisisthis]

aw don't kill them!!!! you mean animal killers. :rolleyes:

these would eat your dog.

[d0uche_n0zzle]

After they're in the cage, place it in a water filled garbage can till the fuckers drown.

[tar_baby]

or hold some colt 45 outside the cage and watch em squirm

[whoisisthis]

I was planning on a hose from the exhaust of my truck, into the cage with a tarp over it.


nice and humane.

[Myhairygrundle]

do these traps stay on the ground? These things stay in the trees..if they got onto the ground then my dogs would get at them. No good.


I like this idea though..I think I'll modify the trap so it's in the branches of this big oak tree they like to hang out in.

I have no problem killing these things. There's nothing cute about them, esecially when they hiss at you and bare their big as teeth. *shudders*


and I like Glen's idea. Hang it's corpse from a tree as a warning to other coons.


The trap is on the ground. They will come out of the trees to eat. Trust me on that one.

Go to www.homedepot.com and type "animal trap" in the search. The link would not paste for some reason.

[tar_baby]

u got ice in yo teef

[whoisisthis]

The trap is on the ground. They will come out of the trees to eat. Trust me on that one.

Go to www.homedepot.com and type "animal trap" in the search. The link would not paste for some reason.

NICE!!
http://img304.imageshack.us/img304/9733/11244544fv.jpg
the racoon Auswich begins!!! I'll post pics of them fuckers when I trap them :)

[Budyzir]

Oh shit. When I saw this thread, I thought it was going to be about ethnic diversity and decreasing property values ! Oh well.

[THE FEZ MAN]

just shoot the mother fuckers and if the cops come or your neighbors bitch tell them to fuck off because they were attempting to attack you or your pets. if i have time i will wright out my Doc and the coons story

[A giiiiiiiiiirl]

my dog needs to be eaten by another animal =x he barks too much.

i still feel bad for the 'coons.

[Turtle]

Put some rat poison in a few hot dogs and leave them out at dusk. The coons will die in a few hours.

[BCH]

Sorry to rain on the parade, but here's just as likely a scenario. You put the dog food/peanut butter mixture in the trap and leave it overnight and you wake up in the morning and there's a new resident. A FUCKING SKUNK!!! Now what do you do? Or you leave the rat poison hot dogs out and someone's dog eats 'em. Shoot the fuckers in the head when you have the chance and can identify the animal.

[d0uche_n0zzle]

Pepe La'Pew is no fun locked in a cage. In NY you are allowed to kill any varmints on your property.

[Stormrider666]

Here I will join in on all the non funny racist jokes that people made about coons. Tie them to the back of a truck. No wait burn crosses on your front lawn to scare them out. No even better dress like some big dumb guinea and hit them in the head with baseball bat. You guys are hilarious!!!!!!

[BCH]

.22 Cal Lever action : $275

http://www.henryrepeating.com/images/rifles/h001_leveraction_large.jpg

Box of .22 Shorts : $2.00

http://www.sltek.webzdarma.cz/foto/22short/Dsc02635_small.jpg


One Dead fucking Raccoon : Priceless

http://bishop.dotnode.com/albums/fd/63/5363.jpeg

[d0uche_n0zzle]

.22 Cal Lever action : $275

http://www.henryrepeating.com/images/rifles/h001_leveraction_large.jpg

Box of .22 Shorts : $2.00

http://www.sltek.webzdarma.cz/foto/22short/Dsc02635_small.jpg


One Dead fucking Raccoon : Priceless

http://bishop.dotnode.com/albums/fd/63/5363.jpeg

I have a Golden Boy from Henry. Great rifles.

[BCH]

I have the .22 Lever W/Octagon Barrel and the Big Boy .45 Colt. The .22 pictured is a really good value. Shooting the .45 was getting a little expensive.

[Tax Kuntz]

Please don't kill mommy & daddy :icon_sad:

http://img351.imageshack.us/img351/1466/raccoonsred8zc.jpg

[tar_baby]

nigs

[diggerdog]

If you know where they live try a body hold trap.
http://img348.imageshack.us/img348/2691/220d6zg.jpg
Simply set in front of hole and WHAM! Dead racoon. Repeat as nesessary, no clean up. If you wait until they are in season you can get some money for thier pelts. It was $25-50 when I trapped as a kid. These traps are serious. DO NOT USe if there is any chance of a pet or child coming in contact with it. I found them here http://www.animalcontrolproducts.com/cgi-bin/ez-catalog/cat_display.cgi?4X355890 , thought I'd save you the time of sorting throught he anti-trapping sites that come up when you do a search.

[whoisisthis]

.22 Cal Lever action : $275

http://www.henryrepeating.com/images/rifles/h001_leveraction_large.jpg

Box of .22 Shorts : $2.00

http://www.sltek.webzdarma.cz/foto/22short/Dsc02635_small.jpg


One Dead fucking Raccoon : Priceless

http://bishop.dotnode.com/albums/fd/63/5363.jpeg

that pic makes me verry happy :)

[Myhairygrundle]

I have the .22 Lever W/Octagon Barrel and the Big Boy .45 Colt. The .22 pictured is a really good value. Shooting the .45 was getting a little expensive.

You hunters will appreciate this.....

Forget the .22 and .45. Shot this deer last season. This is the exit wound of a .300 Winchester Magnum. Needless to say, that part was made into snasages. Still have a freezer full o meat. Would blow a damn racoon to bits. Might piss off the neighbors.

http://img281.imageshack.us/img281/2426/deer18fi.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

[THE FEZ MAN]

Well here is a silly little coon story.

As most of you know I have two Wiemaraners (that’s a large German hunting dog) and live in a neighborhood populated with late middle aged, well off people, and me. One evening I was standing out back doing something in the yard, when I here a hell of a commotion coming from my front yard, you know the sound, barking, yelping hounds accompanied by the child like screams of a trapped animal of some sort running for its life. As I peer around the corner of my house I see something grayish in color running across the yard towards a small tree, with two large gray barking dogs in hot pursuit, the small gray creature leaps about 5ft in air into the tree with Doc right on its tail, just as the critter gets a hold of the tree Doc grabs him in his mouth and they both tumble down the hill, that is my side yard. At first I was worried that they had decided to kill one of my neighbors cats, so I quickly, grab a brick and tell my, then 3 year old son, to stay right where he was and not to move. As I run into the middle of the fracas it becomes instantly clear to me that the boys had scored themselves a coon. I order the dogs to “release” in my best dog voice (I once told the dogs to sit in this voice, and got an entire room of people to stop yapping and start looking for chairs) the dogs instantly release the nasty little varmint, as they should, Problem was, the coon didn’t, now for a second picture this :

The coon is screaming like a little child being mauled to death, Doc is crying and yelping like he has a coon attached to his face that wont let go, Daniel (my son) crying and screaming for what ever reason, me yelling at the dogs to let go, and of course Duncan the wuss running around the whole fiasco barking and crying. So I decide to belt the coon in the head with the brick that I forgot I was holding. I should have just pissed on the both of them, I think it would have had a better effect. Bye this time, Fezman’s flying circus has attracted the attention of my neighbors, at that point I instantaneously make the decision to end this altercation in my favorite fashion, with a Glock 19.

As long as I live, I will never forget the look on that dogs face, as I pulled the trigger about 2” away from his nose, putting a 147grn +P hydro shock, into the chest of that coon.

Needles to say the coon let go of Doc’s face. Just for good measure I decide to put two more in to the little bastard, all the while yelling “You Mother Fucker” relatively loud. All to the horror of my neighbors wife, her two young children and my son. About 50’ away. For some odd reason she told her kids to stay out of the yard,

So to make a long story short, I know too late, shoot the fuckers and put an end to it.

[tar_baby]

i dont hunt...but id love to put some coons in the river

[diggerdog]

For some odd reason she told her kids to stay out of the yard,

Of course she did. You do have that hill in your side yard. Lil' fella could slip on some wet leaves and hurt himself, maybe even scrape his shin. That and the psycho :action-sm that lives there.

[Got One?]

put a swimming pool in your yard. and even if they do come back, and they go swimming, then you have african pet rocks.

[tar_baby]

coons cant swim

[PEST BY TRADE]

If you use a .45 or a .22 in a nieghborhood you will most certainly go to jail do not pass go. Go directly to jail. If you use a .177 air riffle that you can pick up at most of your local wal-marts or k-marts for about $ 50.00 no permit or jail sentance required and they are powerful enough to kill any coons. and sting some golfers :action-sm

[SteveSteele]

I have 100lb Alaskan Malamute. In her five years, she has killed three field mice, two skunks (she got sprayed something awful, but they ended up dead), a squirrel, a racoon, and one rather large possum. She had a baby bird in her mouth once, but I think it died falling out of the tree. It's a miracle she' has come out of all these encounters unscathed. She's got one hell of a small prey drive. I find it amazing that she leaves my cats alone.

[LilJimmiesMule]

Something like this solves any 'Coon Problem.........

http://img149.imageshack.us/img149/6252/shotgun20big47hi.th.jpg (http://img149.imageshack.us/my.php?image=shotgun20big47hi.jpg)

[click]

using firearms is fine in any neighborhood. just go to your closest neighbors and tell them the situation, and not to be worried if they hear gunshots. it helps if you have a rifle slung over your shoulder and a side arm

[generoso]

If you use a .45 or a .22 in a nieghborhood you will most certainly go to jail do not pass go. Go directly to jail. If you use a .177 air riffle that you can pick up at most of your local wal-marts or k-marts for about $ 50.00 no permit or jail sentance required and they are powerful enough to kill any coons. and sting some golfers :action-sm
I doubt a 50 dollar pellet gun is gonna stop a racoon. Birds , cats, little dogs. My Mastiff would just die of laughing if you pointed that at him as most racoons. BTW great story FEZ MAN....

[whoisisthis]

using firearms is fine in any neighborhood.

not in California, unfortunately


ditto on the story, Fez. Good stuff.

[Lil'JimmysMule]

Can always get those humane traps..once you trap tham take them for a drive about 5 miles away...

Beat me to it. I had one living under my deck and it would try to get in the house to get the fruit we had on the kitchen table. If it wasnt for the dog's keeping it away Im sure it would have come in. Get a Hav-A-Heart trap and take it away........BUT do not get caught letting it go. BIG FINE's, at least here in Jersey. I had a County Cop see me let a Grond Hog go and he gave me shit but didnt fine me. He told me if it was a coon he would have.

[whoisisthis]

looks like the trap's the way I'll go.


I'm just gonna mount it vertically on the tree, so I don't have to worry about skunks getting caught in it(skunks don't climb trees, do they?)


the thing that really pisses me off, is that being as how big and unafraid these things are, someone has to be feeding them. Probably some old lady or something

[d0uche_n0zzle]

Some people don't have completely liberal gun hating scumfuckbags for neighbors. No .177 will drop a coon either, even at 1000 FPS. A .22 pellet going at 850 FPS in the head might drop him or piss him off and he'll run away.

Loved the story Fez.

[BCH]

Yeah a .17 HMR perhaps. Not a fucking pellet gun. I shot one of the crows that were conregating outside my bedroom window for a week with my RWS from about 20 Yds. and he laughed at me and flew away.

[click]

good story Fez, forgot to say that

[THE FEZ MAN]

thanks it's one of my favorites, i plan to clean it up and stretch it out to submit that one and the Doc eating the money story to weimaraner magazine

[Budyzir]

Hey Fez, I gotta move to your hood where you can walk around strapping a Glock while doing a bit of yard work! I LOVE IT !!!

I used to have a Colt M1911, had to turn it in to the NYPD when I left the service and came back to NYC.

BTW, the Glock is a fine sidearm but, I found the trigger (the ones I fired had a safety as a second lever < articulated trigger? It’s been a long time.> on the trigger) to have a long pull. It was hard to anticipate exactly when the weapon would fire. I preferred the safety lever that was built into the grip of the Colt It had a set point of discharge. Just an observation.

[PEST BY TRADE]

I doubt a 50 dollar pellet gun is gonna stop a racoon. Birds , cats, little dogs. My Mastiff would just die of laughing if you pointed that at him as most racoons. BTW great story FEZ MAN....

It's pretty obvious that you can't kill a mastiff with a pellet gun. But you can kill a coon with one and I have. I live in a pretty crowded neighborhood and I can't just break out the AR 15 and start slinging lead with houses so close but we had one that wouldn't leave after many nights of hanging around so I used my son riffle he uses at boys scouts and it worked with just two shots It may not work in every case but it can work.

[THE FEZ MAN]

after about 1000 rounds using the Glock becomes second nature. I can double tap just as fast with my glock as I can with a single action. the trick is learning how far to pull the trigger and how far to let it go. The first “trigger” safety is only a physical blocking device that really doesn’t do shit other than let you kind of know that you have your finger on the trigger, the way I hold the weapon my finger actually fits perfectly against it and instantly disengages it. In my opinion the “safe action” of the Glock is way smother than other DAO weapons not to mention safer than carrying a cocked and locked 1911 concealed in your pants. With my luck I would end up shooting myself in the ass or running one down my leg blowing my foot off. As for packing in the yard, Myself and a couple of my neighbors have had a few altercations with strangers and or trespassing hunters and other critters so a few of us prefer to be able to defend ourselves, we like pitch forks and torches too. we are also in an aria that has state police coverage and they are stretched kind of thin. They never even showed up when I called them and told them what I did, they just asked if the neighbors were up set and if I had been bitten.

[GLENN_THE_TOOL]

usually a white hood, a flaming cross, and a shotgun do the trick.

ohhhh, you meant raccoons. silly me.

[whoisisthis]

thanks it's one of my favorites, i plan to clean it up and stretch it out to submit that one and the Doc eating the money story to weimaraner magazine

you really should. Your money story was probably one of the best thing's I've read on a message board.

[tar_baby]

some FUBU gear should work

[whoisisthis]

so the three different type of traps I tried out were miserable failures


I learned my lesson about leaving my cans out, but I just came back in from picking up a garbage can full of yard waste(they were after fallen apples), in the pouring ass freezing rain. Right now(10-4:00am) is when the little assholes strike, so using the .22 is out of the question due to neighbors.


Does anyone here know anything about hardcore pellet guns? I need to find a repeater that'll drop 3-4, 30-ish LB. raccoons. I'll pay anything, and I'm not talking about Wal-Mart red ryder shit.


They retreat up this huge tree I have, one right after the other in single file every time I catch them in the act. I can't wait to see these fuckers drop 50 feet so I can beat thier dying bodies with a rusty spade shovel.:icon_evil



oh, also....how should I handle the dead bodies? I know they carry all kinds of nasty shit like rabies and tuburculosis and e-coli and shit, so should I wear the full-on biohazard gear?

[Chronic Pain]

so the three different type of traps I tried out were miserable failures


I learned my lesson about leaving my cans out, but I just came back in from picking up a garbage can full of yard waste(they were after fallen apples), in the pouring ass freezing rain. Right now(10-4:00am) is when the little assholes strike, so using the .22 is out of the question due to neighbors.


Does anyone here know anything about hardcore pellet guns? I need to find a repeater that'll drop 3-4, 30-ish LB. raccoons. I'll pay anything, and I'm not talking about Wal-Mart red ryder shit.


They retreat up this huge tree I have, one right after the other in single file every time I catch them in the act. I can't wait to see these fuckers drop 50 feet so I can beat thier dying bodies with a rusty spade shovel.:icon_evil



oh, also....how should I handle the dead bodies? I know they carry all kinds of nasty shit like rabies and tuburculosis and e-coli and shit, so should I wear the full-on biohazard gear?

For the REAL deal to take care of those oversized rats, see my sig pic - .300 Winchester Short Mag 180gr. Accubond. For the REALISTIC deal, look for a Benjamin/Sheridan pellet gun in 5mm (.20 cal). I have one that used to be my grandfathers. He used to use it on everything from squirrels to dogs in his garden. After 4 pumps it'll shoot through 1" plywood. Check it out below (sorry, long link) Remember, shoot early and shoot often! Good luck! Oh and as far as the carcass, just wear gloves and toss them in either your's or your neighbors trash can. You have nothing to worry about except fleas unless you get any body fluids on you.
http://www.cabelas.com/cabelas/en/templates/pod/horizontal-pod.jsp?_DARGS=/cabelas/en/common/catalog/pod-link.jsp_A&_DAV=MainCatcat20712&rid=&indexId=cat20742&navAction=push&navCount=3&parentType=index&parentId=cat20742&id=0013557

[HummerTuesdays]

This isn't my idea. It was in a "tips" email that I somehow got registered for. I don't have problems with coons in my trash, but thought someone here might want to be the guinnea pig. :)

Being in the garbage business for 27 years, I found out that
by using moth crystals, not mothballs, in your garbage can,
you can keep out flies and animals! Also keep the inside as
dry as possible by using a lot of newspaper to wrap garbage
in.

[Nurse Ratchet]

You need to get some Mountian Lion Pee and spray it around the outside of your house. It's scares the racoons away.

[whoisisthis]

where the hell do I get mountain lion piss?

Chronic, that pellet gun looks cool as fuck, but do you know if they make a semi-auto powerful enough for raccoons?

[Nurse Ratchet]

where the hell do I get mountain lion piss?

Chronic, that pellet gun looks cool as fuck, but do you know if they make a semi-auto powerful enough for raccoons?


You can pretty much get any kind of pee you want

http://www.predatorpee.com/

[d0uche_n0zzle]

This will drop those fuckers...

http://www.pyramydair.com/cgi-bin/model.pl?model_id=307

[KantSpelGi]

6ft.by 5ft 2ft tall,tie a string to the back door go in the frontdoor .wait,open door trap shuts. then ya have some fun! http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b133/nascar123/trap.jpg

[Chronic Pain]

where the hell do I get mountain lion piss?

Chronic, that pellet gun looks cool as fuck, but do you know if they make a semi-auto powerful enough for raccoons?

Don't know about the semi-auto powerful enough. Another thing you might try would be a semi-auto paintball gun. If you sting those fuckers good enough they might not come back.

[whoisisthis]

You can pretty much get any kind of pee you want

http://www.predatorpee.com/


holy shit...who knew? Thanks, I'll give that a try too



I hope it doesn't sttract other mountain lions, there's alot of them around here this time of year

[BCH]

whoisisthis, I think you'll find that the "Real Thing" in this case, a subsonic .22 caliber "short" fired from a long rifle will sound just as inocuous as a high powered air rifle. Please keep in mind that you'll only get one shot as the others will scatter immidiately but probably won't return.

[whoisisthis]

This will drop those fuckers...

http://www.pyramydair.com/cgi-bin/model.pl?model_id=307


nice! thanks for that link...


I need this for no good practical reason
http://img457.imageshack.us/img457/1524/zmdnightstalkerkit7gm.jpg

[whoisisthis]

whoisisthis, I think you'll find that the "Real Thing" in this case, a subsonic .22 caliber "short" fired from a long rifle will sound just as inocuous as a high powered air rifle. Please keep in mind that you'll only get one shot as the others will scatter immidiately but probably won't return.


I need them all dead....it's personal.

[Chronic Pain]

I need them all dead....it's personal.

One other thing I forgot - you can take a baby bottle nipple and place it over the muzzle of a .22 (don't use really high velocity loads) and it is an effective silencer for 2-4 shots.
Happy Hunting:action-sm