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**See This Page With Full Graphics, Pictures and Color!** CLICK HERE --> : ashlee simpson is musical guest on snl again next week

GreatAmericanZero
10-02-2005, 01:02 AM
what the fuck? this is bullshit. Who the fuck is ashlee simpson? what the hell did she ever do to get so many chances in hollywood? talented musicians are thrown in the crapper all the time. Talented musicians that deserve to be on SNL and get tv exposure are obscure and meanwhile this no-talented cunt is on tv all the time despite everybody hating her. I don't care if she has the most beautiful singing voice i have ever heard. She can be one of those fucking bitches in the Odyssey that made Odysseus lose his mind, doesnt mean shit to me. Shes still a talentless bitch who deserves to die. I am so dissapointed in SNL for feeding into the bullshit. Theres going to be a publicity campaign and they are going to get huge ratings but at what cost? I'm so disgusted
Perch1019
10-02-2005, 01:23 AM
I usually hate SNL but the thing they did with Kayne and Mike Myers to mock the incident from the telethon was really funny. Anyone else see it?
Jables2002
10-02-2005, 05:56 AM
Who had that joke....

"We all have fantasies about Jessica Simpson. Am I right guys? My fantasy goes like this: "Hey Jessica. Come hold your sister down so I can kick her in the throat."

I think it might have been Jim Gaffigan.
GreatAmericanZero
10-02-2005, 06:04 AM
Who had that joke....

"We all have fantasies about Jessica Simpson. Am I right guys? My fantasy goes like this: "Hey Jessica. Come hold your sister down so I can kick her in the throat."

I think it might have been Jim Gaffigan.


i believe it was Dave Attel. Its not Jim Gaffigan b/c its not about Manitees
busterbros
10-02-2005, 06:45 AM
Yep, it was Attell.
Jables2002
10-02-2005, 02:59 PM
Oh yeah.... It was attel.

Off topic:
Make sure you watch the insomniac tour thing on Comedy Central tonight! I think it is on at 10, but they will probably replay it a lot.
tar_baby
10-02-2005, 03:37 PM
simpson was made by MTV...mtv has so much control over what people listen to and buy its crazy

TRL is one of the biggest marketing schemes in history
Karl Hungus
10-02-2005, 03:42 PM
Don't worry, it won't be long till Sirius gives her a show and she won't be heard from ever again!
Detox
10-02-2005, 05:01 PM
Oh yeah.... It was attel.

Off topic:
Make sure you watch the insomniac tour thing on Comedy Central tonight! I think it is on at 10, but they will probably replay it a lot.

Thanks for the reminder!
Cum_Son
10-02-2005, 05:42 PM
Make sure you watch the insomniac tour thing on Comedy Central tonight! I think it is on at 10, but they will probably replay it a lot.

They're also playing it in the secret stash next saturday, so I might just wait to see it uncut.
Jables2002
10-02-2005, 09:16 PM
They're also playing it in the secret stash next saturday, so I might just wait to see it uncut.

Sweet. I might wait as well. Cause I don't wanna miss family guy tonight.
Jef Leppard
10-09-2005, 01:22 AM
well she made it through the first song. lets hope she dont let us down with the next one.
cunt.
McDonaldMouth
10-09-2005, 01:38 AM
that was a song?? that was moaning with lots of reverb.. she's trying to sound like if janis joplin was the lead singer for green day... she's ugly and untalented.. her father should be crucified for what he's done to "his girls"
ChrisH
10-09-2005, 01:45 AM
Not only was her performance mediocre at best, but SNL has FUCKING BLOWN tonight. So far, only one really funny laugh (the Lorne Michaels walkon during weekend update).
LiddyRules
10-09-2005, 01:51 AM
Oh come on guys. It's not that easy to keep your voice at one note and still consider it a "song" at least for the first one. "Boyfriend," again, she doesn't sing, she talks. When she attempts to sing, is tone deaf appropriate? I mean she really has no range, zero, absolutely none. The outfit during "boyfriend" is so horribly unsexy, I mean on someone hot it might work but on her it looks horrible. I would have loved for someone to just stand up and boo the shit out of her.

This is a horrible episode so far.
Sack of Chisels
10-09-2005, 01:54 AM
Awful.
LiddyRules
10-09-2005, 01:58 AM
I will give them credit. That Black Eyed Peas skit was fucking funny.
tar_baby
10-09-2005, 02:09 AM
i want to poke her father in the eye with a rusty trombone
GreatAmericanZero
10-09-2005, 03:09 AM
I gotta say..i thought that Ashlee Simpson was going to sound great tonight. I thought she was going to belt out shit, sounding like kelly clarkson or some shit. I figured she is successful enough to afford the best vocal coaches in the world. She can get some kind of crazy vocal cord surgery to make her sound like Whitney Houston. But she did nothing. There was no moment in any of her songs for anyone to say "Well we were wrong about her, she sure can sing". I also liked that SNL didnt give her anytime by throwing her in a skit or even doing a goofy joke about her the last time she was on. Just let the cunt sing and ignore her the rest of the time.

And also, lets forget about the fact that she has no singing ability. She is a horrible looking woman. She looks like a tranny. She has an awful hook nose and masculine features. A big bold manly chin and manly shoulders. Id fuck any other chick on SNL that night over her, including Rachel Dratch. I'm hoping for ovary cancer for her
Jef Leppard
10-09-2005, 11:55 AM
yea i gave up after my last post and watched flight plan....its ok
Arc Lite
10-09-2005, 12:46 PM
Glad I missed it.
BruceKellysJunk
10-09-2005, 01:03 PM
She sounded like Tara Reid singing.
Begbie
10-09-2005, 01:14 PM
I was hoping for another Ashlee Simpson "malfunction", but instead the only malfunction I witnessed was SNL's so-called comedy. The show should've ended years ago, yet it keeps trudging along...wheels falling off and all. Nowadays, they're good for 1, 2, maybe 3 skits...and that may be a stretch. Although, that's just my guess...I mean, I either fall asleep midway through or just change the channel in disgust.

Last night for example, the show opener with Bush, Miers, and Cheney is topical and there can be ways to make a funny skit about it. But it was just awful...and maybe it's just Will Forte's horrendous Bush impression or his cringeworthy cue card reading. But then another example, the "spanish variety show" skit had potential...but there was nothing to smile at. It's almost as if they know the lines are not funny, yet they think they can make funny voices or include some ironical humor to bolster it up. They now run along the same lines as the cartoon skits in the paper...dull, pointless, and you wish the 'Family Circus' kids were administered a bath by Andrea Yates.

And well, yeah Ashlee Simpson is still an untalented cunt who has no vocal range. If she has to belt out a high note, her voice tends to shreak and squeak. Yet singing low monotone, like during that first song, anyone can speed through that with no problem. I can only hope that twat's tourbus flips over and her ex-bf Ryan Cabrera is in there with her. Oh, and John Mayer too...ech, he makes sick.
Lil'JimmysMule
10-09-2005, 05:51 PM
Why is this fucking cunt still relavant?
d0uche_n0zzle
10-09-2005, 05:53 PM
Nope.
tar_baby
10-10-2005, 07:31 PM
ive heard some rumors that mayer has everybody fooled and he's really a cool guy and somewhat of an asshole

just a rumor though..just a rumor
LiddyRules
10-10-2005, 08:36 PM
ive heard some rumors that mayer has everybody fooled and he's really a cool guy and somewhat of an asshole

just a rumor though..just a rumor

I think it's just that John Mayer sucks ass, nothing to do with him a person.