Lesson 1: Walking in the rain like a man.

[Three Hole Puncher]

In an attempt to combat the rampant sissification of men that is taking place in this most fine country known as The United States of America (unfortunately named after some greasy wop), I will be posting lessons that all real mean should take to heart, and in doing so, maybe I can do my small part to prevent the slide into abject Nancydom that I see so many of my fellow men falling victim to these days.

Therefore:

Lesson 1: Walking in the rain like a man.

A real man should walk in the rain. He should not prance, mince, cavort, scamper, or scurry. A real man should walk in the rain with his head held high and his back straight. A real man should not even acknowledge anything as inconsequential as a couple of raindrops... it's fucking drops of water, not bursting artillery shells, you limp-wristed pansies!

Our great Northern European anscestors stood tall in the prows of ships and took the freezing rain and spray from gale force winds in their faces without flinching when they crossed wide oceans to discover and this settle this great land, and you can't even cross a mall parking lot during a sun shower without scurrying like a little panty waist and pulling your jacket over your head?! What's the matter, Linda!? Afraid you're going to muss your do?!

Umbrellas... a real man should only resort to the use of an umbrella when it's pissing down in biblical proportions, and then, only after he has offered the use of said umbrella to his woman companion in a gentlemanly fashion.

Newspaper... a real man may hold a newspaper over his head, but again, only when it's pissing down in the aforementioned biblical proportions.

Golashes, rubbers, overshoes... NEVER! Unless you're an 80-year-old fossil with tufts of hair growing out of your ears, and your sans-a-belt slacks pulled up to your armpits, or you're some kind of dirt-felching homo who doesn't want to ruin his fine Corinthian leather loafers, you shouldn't even consider putting these badges of weakness and shame on your feet.

And no matter what you're carrying and/or wearing, when you walk in the rain, you will WALK in the rain.

Are we clear? I said... are we clear?!

Good.

Thus endeth todays lesson.

[Multiple Miggs]

Is this ok to use?

http://img177.imageshack.us/img177/8964/avumb319qk3.jpg

[Death Metal Moe]

If I'm in my normal clothes, I won't make a big deal out of being in the rain.

If I have nicer stuff on, I want an umbrella.

[Three Hole Puncher]

D'oh!

I swear... it's a hopeless battle.

[martianvirus]

I only hurry out of rain if I have electronic equipment on me. You can't let it get wet.




Is it ok to sing in the rain? ..... ......................... no homo.

[Philly loser]

http://www.carlspackler.com/archive/cs_263.jpg

[ShooterMcGavin]

http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a333/shootermcgvn/medium_gene_kelly_-_singing_in_the_.jpg


http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a333/shootermcgvn/Dustin-Hoffman---Rain-Man--C1010188.jpg

[commish13]

I love the rain, and I laugh at it.

[GLENN_THE_TOOL]

i give rain the finger. i look at a puddle and flip the bird, "FUCK YOU RAIN!"

:fu4:

[abudabit]

The rain is a good opportunity to piss your pants in public with out being laughed at.

[martianvirus]

Fuck. It's been raining all day and now it's been snowing for the last 3 hours.

There is fucking snow all over the place. FUCK!!!!!!!!!!

[Philly loser]

Screw that! Where are you that it's snowing Martianvirus?

[Glenn Dandy]

Im 38 and I have never owned an umberella or used one i can think of.. I however have a mini one for my golf clubs....Its cute:) no homo./

[martianvirus]

Screw that! Where are you that it's snowing Martianvirus?
Rapid City, SD.:icon_eek:

[BIV]

Damn, someone doesn't live in Seattle.

I will keep my umbrella, thank you very much.

[SteveSteele]

I don't use an umbrella even if the rain is coming down in biblical proportions. It's water faggots and it will dry. I do, however put my phone and MyFi in my pack to keep them dry. Electronical goodies are always more important.

[dodisman]

Didn't the Mythbusters prove that you get less wet walking in the rain versus running anyways?

[B54]

Didn't the Mythbusters prove that you get less wet walking in the rain versus running anyways?

That isn't true.

Running through the rain will keep you a lot drier (not just 10% drier) than walking.

First the theory. We divide the raindrops hitting you into two categories: (1) head drops, which fall from above and would hit you even if you were standing still; and (2) chest drops, which you run/walk into and which wouldn't hit you if you were standing still. We can all agree that the number of head drops is strictly a function of how long you're out in the rain; if you run, fewer head drops. The question is whether the allegedly larger number of chest drops you get when running outweighs the definitely larger number of head drops you get while walking.

Not to keep you in suspense, the answer is no. If we ignore aerodynamic effects, we can show mathematically (but won't) that while you'll collect many fewer head drops running rather than walking, you'll get exactly the same number of chest drops, regardless of the speed at which you travel. Bottom line: you'll be a lot wetter if you walk.

But wait, you say. What about those pesky aerodynamic effects? The requisite math is a bit daunting, but never fear. Heedless of his delicate health or his already low reputation with the neighbors, your columnist spent a recent rainy Saturday running down the street like an idiot brandishing pieces of red construction paper clipped to cardboard, the better to snag and count raindrops. Methodology: three trials of two runs each over a fixed distance, once running, once walking. Winds: calm. Angle of attack of paper relative to ground: 45 degrees. Results:

Trial #1. Running, 15 seconds to run course; 213 drops. Walking, 40 seconds; couldn't count drops, paper soaked. Shortened course.

Trial #2. Running, 7 seconds; 131 drops. Walking, 20 seconds; 216 drops.

Trial #3. Running, 7 seconds; 147 drops. Walking, 17 seconds; 221 drops.

So there you are. The differences are larger than the numbers suggest because many drops on the "walking" papers dried before I could count them. My guess is that the number of drops is exactly proportional. If you're out twice as long, you get twice as wet.

One obvious caveat. If enough rain falls on you, whether because of the intensity of the rainfall or the distance you have to travel, eventually you'll be thoroughly soaked. After that it doesn't matter whether you run or walk; you're as wet as you're going to get. So the preceding applies only to relatively short sprints through less-than-torrential downpours. Sorry, no wallet charts. My advice: always run--if nothing else you could use the exercise.

I look foward to Lesson 2.

[DoughBoy]

The only time I wear rain gear is when I'm fishing in the fall or EARLY spring. Boots, rubber bibs, and a slicker with neoprene cuffs (not to forget the camo fishing cap). If I'm out there in 50 degree weather and it is going to be a few hours... I'm wearing them. They're manly, stained with blood, squid ink, and fish guts.

[Bunny™]

It always seems that the only time I'm caught outside in the rain is when I'm in a highly populated place, usually a city. If I'm wearing comfortable shoes that permit it, I'll jog briskly, or even break into a full run. Not very manly....
Unless you do what I do, I'll keep my right hand inside my coat (never a poncho or a slicker) over my heart, as if I'm securing a firearm strapped to a shoulder holster. And if I get clipped by an over-anxious beat cop, at least I'll have died manly.
And if I survive.... Even more manly. Not only will acting manly get you laid, but getting shot for it will probably get you some anal.

[Angelfuck]

Didn't the Mythbusters prove that you get less wet walking in the rain versus running anyways?

they said you get wet either way, I think they said theoretically you would get wetter running but their experiments showed the same amount of water, in the end I think they just said once youre wet you cant get any wetter so it really doesnt matter

[THE FEZ MAN]

fuck the rain, im no pussy ill walk to my car in the rain like there's nothing wrong. but if im going to be active all day in the rain i will dress to keep dry ive gotten hypothermia more than once being mr big balls. after the last fuck up i went out and bought these: http://www.cabelas.com/cabelas/en/templates/pod/horizontal-pod.jsp?_DARGS=/cabelas/en/common/catalog/pod-link.jsp_A&_DAV=MainCatcat470076-cat470082_TGP&rid=&indexId=cat470082&navAction=push&masterpathid=&navCount=7&parentType=index&parentId=cat470082&id=0005232
thats the top of the line shit and i fucking love it cammo and all
i also bought a nice gortex field coat that i ware around

fuck being wet