**See This Page With Full Graphics, Pictures and Color!** CLICK HERE --> : Paul R. Nelson
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 01:44 PM
Anyone else feel like totally drilling this bit into the ground? :icon_mrgr
http://img154.imageshack.us/img154/1836/7806viroquakeeslereide2yh4.jpg
::mod edit::
Paul R Nelson Campaign Ads
Interview with Paul R Nelson (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kk4p7gDR3bE)
Life is Beautiful (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22teJ1XFAhU) [2] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isn4DMm7WXo)
The Best political ad ever..... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcHgkRgET6s)
Paul R Nelson for Congress, Terror commercial (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=be2yj-I4ZeA)
Paul R Nelson interview with KSTP TV (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMU3pbrgQik)
D.H. Jenkins
10-26-2006, 01:49 PM
I'm Paul R. Nelson, and I approve of this thread - now treat yourself!
mr.lance
10-26-2006, 01:52 PM
Fuck your topic im Paul R Nelson!
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 01:54 PM
Fellas, I'm not gonna stand here and watch you cut that thing open and watch Paul R. Nelson spill out all over the dock!
Arch Stanton
10-26-2006, 01:54 PM
So, what do you call yourselves?....we call ourselves........Paul R Nelson
VilleDick
10-26-2006, 01:56 PM
Paul R. Nelson infects, replicates, and kills within 5 hours. These numbers can't be right.
VilleDick
10-26-2006, 01:58 PM
Dammit Paul R. Nelson, I'm a doctor not a senator
JimsInfectedEye
10-26-2006, 02:02 PM
Its just wRONg to start this thread. I'm Paul R. Nelson and I support this message.
mr.lance
10-26-2006, 02:02 PM
I did not have sexual realtions with Paul R Nelson.
Paul R Nelson has wepons on mass desturction and has used them agains the kurds.
Just Win Paul R Nelson Win !
NorfCal
10-26-2006, 02:04 PM
http://nelson.sitebuilder.completecampaigns.com/content/images/Parade6_6790_1_2_2390.jpg
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 02:07 PM
http://img107.imageshack.us/img107/9205/blazingsad162bky3.jpg
I hired you people to try to get a little track laid, not to jump around like a bunch of Kansas City Paul R. Nelsons!
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 02:13 PM
Ask not what Paul R. Nelson can do for you but, WHAT YOU CAN DO FOR PAUL R. NELSON!
Turkov
10-26-2006, 02:15 PM
"Paul R. Nelson, rush chairman, damn glad to meet you."
BabyHat3R
10-26-2006, 02:15 PM
Put Him In A Body Bag Paul R. Nelson!!!
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 02:21 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v676/Budyzir/Illegal_Immigration_Sign_8609_1_2_6.jpg
greasy48
10-26-2006, 02:25 PM
who the hell can figger, if sam's white or a Paul R. Nelson
pure_waves
10-26-2006, 02:25 PM
Paul R Nelllllllsooooooooooooonne!! This Thread Sucks Haitian Cock !
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 02:26 PM
WHOA. I don't believe what I'm hearing. Check out the BALLS on this kid. Hey Paul R, Nelson, this is for you. That's the way. You don't take no shit from nobody.
Jimmy's Dignity
10-26-2006, 02:29 PM
a couple of my contributions from the Listening thread...
http://img124.imageshack.us/img124/7903/heman201mw1.jpg
BY THE POWER OF PAUL R. NELSON!!!!
YO PAUL R. NELSON!! I DID IT!!!!
http://www.enterstageright.com/archive/articles/082800rocky.jpg
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 02:29 PM
It's a Sicilian message. It means Paul R. Nelson sleeps with the fishes.
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:30 PM
"The day I follow Paul R. Nelson on a wet deck is the day I slit my throat
WowMe
10-26-2006, 02:30 PM
Was it over when Paul R. Nelson bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no.... and it ain't over now.
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:33 PM
"I'm gonna ask you a simple question and I want you to listen to me: who's the big winner here tonight at the casino? Huh? Paul R. Nelson, that's who."
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 02:35 PM
This is good stuff. I got it from Paul R. Nelson.
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:35 PM
"Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
'I'm sorry Paul R. Nelson, I'm afraid I can't do that."
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:36 PM
"Yippee-ki-yay, Paul R. Nelson."
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:38 PM
"Describe in single words only the good things that come into your mind about... Paul R. Nelson. "
D.H. Jenkins
10-26-2006, 02:39 PM
Mike! You don't come to Wisconson and talk to a man like Paul R. Nelson like that!
WowMe
10-26-2006, 02:41 PM
Greetings Professor Paul R. Nelson. Shall we play a game?
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 02:42 PM
Write This On A Rock, "Paul R. Nelson"
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:42 PM
"Get your stinking paws off me you damn dirty Paul R. Nelson! "
D.H. Jenkins
10-26-2006, 02:42 PM
That uppity Paul R. Nelson went and hit me over the head with a shovel.
Turkov
10-26-2006, 02:42 PM
"There's something out there waiting for us... and it ain't no Paul R. Nelson..."
VilleDick
10-26-2006, 02:43 PM
"3000 years of glorious history from Moses to Paul R. Nelson, you're God damn right I'm livin' in the past"
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 02:44 PM
Four score and seven years ago, Paul R. Nelson brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
D.H. Jenkins
10-26-2006, 02:46 PM
<singing> "Oh the house next door to me's been sold to Paul R. Nelson"
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:47 PM
"You're telling me that now, that now that Paul R. Nelson is free, and we're making good on our commitment to him, he's just gonna decide, out of the fucking blue, to rip us off? Why don't you tell me what really happened?"
Turkov
10-26-2006, 02:49 PM
<channeling David Allan Coe>"She said someday I'd understand what love was all about, she said I could have the kids, she was movin' out. Said she finally found a man whose dick was so much bigger, then that scumbag motherfucker ran off with Paul R. Nelson"
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:49 PM
"Hasta la vista, Paul R. Nelson."
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 02:49 PM
"It rubs the lotion on Paul R. Nelson's skin or else it gets the hose again."
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:50 PM
"Paul R. Nelson, ain't got shit on me!"
D.H. Jenkins
10-26-2006, 02:50 PM
"As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a congressman"
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:50 PM
"Paul R. Nelson, we have a problem."
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 02:52 PM
Remember The Paul R. Nelson
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:52 PM
"Paul R. Nelson, why'd it have to be Paul R. Nelson?"
krinkle krinkle
10-26-2006, 02:52 PM
ever seen a Paul R Nelson come apart like that?
thats how Paul R Nelson laughs at you...
WowMe
10-26-2006, 02:52 PM
When I close my eyes, I see this thing, a sign, I see this name in bright blue neon lights with a purple outline. And this name is so bright and so sharp that the sign -- it just blows up because the name is so powerful... It says, "Paul R. Nelson.
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:53 PM
"It is I, Paul R. Nelson, son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeater of the Saxons, Sovereign of all England!"
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:54 PM
"You think you can catch Paul R. Nelson? You think a guy like that comes this close to getting caught, and sticks his head out? If he comes up for anything it'll be to get rid of me. After that... my guess is you'll never hear from him again."
WowMe
10-26-2006, 02:55 PM
Well, the Sister was right. You boys could use a little churching up. Slide on down to the Triple Rock, and catch Rev. Paul R. Nelson. You boys listen to what he's got to say!
FUBAR
10-26-2006, 02:56 PM
Perhaps he need a good talking to, if you don't mind my saying so. Perhaps a bit more. My Paul R. Nelson , sir, he didn't care for the Overlook at first. he actually stole a pack of matches, and tried to burn it down. But I "corrected" him sir.
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:57 PM
http://ia.imdb.com/media/imdb/01/I/13/04/81m.jpg
"I didn't kill Paul R. Nelson."
Jimmy's Dignity
10-26-2006, 02:57 PM
There's 7 Paul R. Nelson's in my ass and there's always room for 8!
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 02:59 PM
"What are you doin' here? You oughta be out in a convertible bird-doggin' chicks and bangin' Paul R. Nelson."
VilleDick
10-26-2006, 03:00 PM
To boldly go where no Paul R Nelson has gone before
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 03:01 PM
[singing] When Paul R. Nelson was in Egypt's land..."let my Paul R. Nelson go!"
Palerider4146
10-26-2006, 03:01 PM
God damn filthy Paul R. Nelson.
Do you mind if we dance with your Paul R. Nelson?
jacobcorner
10-26-2006, 03:02 PM
"GIVE ME BACK MY PAUL R. NELSON!!!"
http://www.villagefair.com/MelGibson/ransom/images/mel.jpg
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 03:02 PM
"There are two kinds of people in the world, my friend: Those with a rope around the neck, and Paul R. Nelson. "
pure_waves
10-26-2006, 03:06 PM
Git some! Git some! Git some, yeah, yeah, yeah!
Anyone that runs, is Paul R Nelson. Anyone that stands still, is a well-disciplined Paul R. Nelson!
WowMe
10-26-2006, 03:08 PM
Paul R. Tapdancing Nelson I have seen the light!
LetsDoThisLucas
10-26-2006, 03:09 PM
When in Paul R Nelson
WowMe
10-26-2006, 03:11 PM
My name is Paul R. Nelson. You killed my father, prepare to die.
FUBAR
10-26-2006, 03:12 PM
God darnit Mr. Paul R. Nelson, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 03:12 PM
"You see that window with the light? The one closet to the edge of the building? you know who lives there? Of course you don't know who lives there, but I'm saying 'Do you know who lives there?' Paul R. Nelson lives there, and that isn't my apartment. My wife is in there and... I'm gonna kill her."
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 03:13 PM
"As Paul R. Nelson falls, so falls Paul R. Nelson falls."
Jimmy's Dignity
10-26-2006, 03:13 PM
You're gonna be Paul R. Nelson! Say the goddamned words!!! You're gonna be Paul R. Nelson!
pure_waves
10-26-2006, 03:14 PM
show me how you suck paul r. nelsons cock
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 03:15 PM
They call me MISTER Paul R. Nelson!
WowMe
10-26-2006, 03:15 PM
Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you would have Paul R. Nelson.
FUBAR
10-26-2006, 03:17 PM
I broke my Paul R. Nelson ,man.
Bill Lehecka
10-26-2006, 03:19 PM
Paul R. Nelson was very badly *****, ya see?
TheSqueakyWheel
10-26-2006, 03:19 PM
[Singing] White people are so scared of Paul R. Nelson
TheSqueakyWheel
10-26-2006, 03:20 PM
You mind if we dance with your Paul R. Nelson?
TheSqueakyWheel
10-26-2006, 03:21 PM
I want you to stand there in your faggety white uniform and ask me Paul R. Nelson!
and
YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE PAUL R NELSON!
jacobcorner
10-26-2006, 03:22 PM
Opie: You want Paul R. Nelson?
Ant: I think I'm entitled to him.
Opie: You want Paul R. Nelson?
Ant: I want the truth!
Opie: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lil Meaty Tits? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Sam and you curse the Pests. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Sam's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives...You don't want Paul R. Nelson. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that cake. You need me on that cake.
We use words like psycho, moron, jackass...we use these words as the backbone of a show spent entertaining someone. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very entertainment I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a mic and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!
Kaffee: Did you order the Paul R. Nelson?
Jessep: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
Kaffee: Did you order the Paul R. Nelson?
Jessep: You're goddamn right I did!!
WowMe
10-26-2006, 03:24 PM
You wanna get high man??
Does Paul R. Nelson got wooden balls?
jacobcorner
10-26-2006, 03:24 PM
Goodjob Squeaky, just beat me when I was typing it!
stellarcomics
10-26-2006, 03:29 PM
This is the new Pat Battle, isn't it?
We'll all be very sick of this after about 6 months.
Jimbo929
10-26-2006, 03:29 PM
I miss pre-heart attack Paul R. Nelson
jlhoyt13432
10-26-2006, 03:34 PM
http://paulrnelson.com/content/images/Jeep_with_Dino_4719_1_2_4742.jpg
Paul R Nelson - a Soccer Dad.
mr.lance
10-26-2006, 03:39 PM
If Paul R Nelson Runs he's Viet Cong if Paul R Nelson dont run Paul R Nelson is well Trained Viet Cong.
LetsDoThisLucas
10-26-2006, 03:39 PM
Form your lips to Paul R Nelson's ears
mr.lance
10-26-2006, 03:42 PM
"Nelson" Paul R Nelson
nofate301
10-26-2006, 03:46 PM
Paul R Nelson-atorial
Harvey_Birdman
10-26-2006, 03:49 PM
"No Luke, Paul R. Nelson is your father."
nofate301
10-26-2006, 03:51 PM
The paul r nelson is strong with this one
nofate301
10-26-2006, 03:53 PM
Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty paul r nelson!
You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to paul r nelson!
pure_waves
10-26-2006, 03:53 PM
Help me, Paul R. Nelson; you're my only hope.
pure_waves
10-26-2006, 03:55 PM
Paul R Nelson I hear you callin', but I cant come home right now. Me and the boys are playin', and we just cant find the sound...
Towelie
10-26-2006, 03:56 PM
Is it bad?
As opposed to Paul R. Nelson?
nofate301
10-26-2006, 03:57 PM
Easy come, easy go will you let me go
R NELSON!
NO! We will not let you go!
pure_waves
10-26-2006, 04:02 PM
...and shes buying a stairway to paul r. nelson
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:02 PM
"I am Paul R. Nelson, millionaire, I own a mansion and a yacht"
"I've had it with these mother fucking Paul R Nelson's on the mother fucking plane"
"Remember Sully, when I told you'd I'd kill Paul R. Nelson last....I LIED!"
"Give me liberty....or give me Paul R. Nelson"
"GET OFF MY Paul R. Nelson!"
Pumpkin: Which one is your wallet?
Jules: It's the one that says Paul R. Nelson.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:03 PM
40 SPECIALLY TRAINED ECUADORIAN MOUNTAIN Paul R Nelsons
6 VENEZUELAN RED Paul R Nelsons
142 MEXICAN WHOOPING Paul R Nelsons
14 NORTH CHILEAN GUANACOS (CLOSELY RELATED TO THE Paul R Nelson)
REG Paul R Nelson OF BRIXTON
76000 BATTERY Paul R Nelsons FROM "Paul R Nelson-FRESH" FARMS LTD. NEAR PARAGUAY
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 04:05 PM
Three Paul R Nelsons walk in to a bar.....
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:06 PM
...and a Paul R Nelson in a pear tree
NELSON'S?! WE DON'T NEED NO STINKING PAUL R NELSONS!
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:09 PM
Peasant #1: We have found a paul r nelson, may we burn her?
Angry Mob: BURN HER! BUUUURN HER!!
Sir Bedevere: How do you know she is a pau r nelson?
NORTONS BAG
10-26-2006, 04:10 PM
"Words of wisdom, Paul R. Nelson, Words of Wisdom........"
greasy48
10-26-2006, 04:14 PM
Hey Paul R. Nelson, How'd you like to earn 14 dollars the hard way?
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:14 PM
"And you knew who you were then
Goils were goils and men were men
Mister, we could use a man like Paul R. Nelson agaiiiiinnnnnn..."
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:15 PM
"He stinks, and I don't like Paul R Nelson!"
"What kind of a world do we live in in which a man dressed as a Paul R Nelson, steals all my press?!"
"What are you?!?! - I'M PAUL R NELSON!"
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:15 PM
Minstrel: [singing] Bravely Paul R. Nelson rode forth from Camelot. He was not afraid to die, oh Paul R. Nelson. He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways, brave, brave, brave, Paul R. Nelson. He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp, or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken. To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away, and his limbs all hacked and mangled, Paul R. Nelson. His head smashed in and heart cut out, and his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, and his nostrils ripped and his bottom burned off and his penis...
Paul R. Nelson: That's, uh, that's enough music for now, lads... looks like there's attack ads afoot.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:15 PM
Show us on the doll where the Paul R Nelson touched you
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:16 PM
In 14 hundred 92 Paul R Nelson sailed the ocean blue
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:19 PM
Willy Wonka: The strawberries taste like strawberries. The snozzberries taste like snozzberries. The Paul R. Nelson tastes like Paul R. Nelson!
Veruca Salt: Paul R. Nelson? Who ever heard of a Paul R. Nelson?
Oompa Loompas: / Oompa loompa doompadee doo / I've got a Paul R. Nelson for you / Oompa loompa doompadah dee / If you're Ron Kind you'll listen to me...
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:19 PM
Read my lips...Paul R Nelson
patbattlefield
10-26-2006, 04:20 PM
holy god i just got caught up on the last 2 days of the show...this is great
Spadanko
10-26-2006, 04:21 PM
Here are some videos of his ads
http://punditnation.blogspot.com/2006/10/more-goofy-paul-r-nelson-commercials.html
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:21 PM
Now go home and get your fucking paul r nelson
Razor Roman
10-26-2006, 04:21 PM
I'm changing my name to Paulrnelsonfield.
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:22 PM
I brought my Myfi with me to Colorado, thank god I got reception in the mountains...the Paul R Nelson stuff had me in stitches today..
(before you do it....yes I did, and yes it did)
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 04:27 PM
I am reposting mine from the listening thread because I love pulp fiction.
And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is Paul R. Nelson when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
batgoat
10-26-2006, 04:30 PM
Here's an obsure one.....
Don't look now honey, its the obligitory scene.
Paul R. Nelson aaalways has to walk through with his wife.
Egomaniac
LetsDoThisLucas
10-26-2006, 04:33 PM
My name is Paul R Nelson...
Father to a murdered son...
Husband to a murdered wife...
and I will have my vengence in this life or the next
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:34 PM
1, 2, Paul R Nelson's coming for you
3, 4, Better Lock Your Door
5, 6, Grab A Crucifix
7, 8, Better Stay Up Late
9, 10, Never Sleep Again
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:38 PM
http://paulrnelson.com/content/images/Jeep_with_Dino_4719_1_2_4742.jpg
Paul R Nelson - a Soccer Dad.
Now that I know he helped to defeat the dinosaurs, I have a much better feeling about Paul R. Nelson.
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 04:39 PM
Mr. Frank Alexander: Food alright?
Alex DeLarge: Great sir, great!
Mr. Frank Alexander: Try the Paul R. Nelson!
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 04:39 PM
<A HREF="http://paulrnelson.com/sbcc/personalinfo.php?page=biography&seq=13">Paul R. Nelson T-Shirts, $10!!!</A>
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:39 PM
His name was Paul R. Nelson. He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals. He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr and suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo. In other words, Paul R. Nelson was the balls.
What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole... Paul R. Nelson? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing. How 'bout we get you in your p.j.'s and we hit the hay.
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 04:40 PM
She was very badly *****, you see! We were assaulted by Paul R Nelson in this house! In this very room you are sitting in now! I was left a helpless cripple, but for her the agony was too great! The doctor said it was pneumonia; because it happened some months later! During a flu epidemic! The doctors told me it was pneumonia, but I knew what it was! A VICTIM OF THE Paul R. Nelson! Poor, poor girl!
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:41 PM
http://www.southwestern.edu/~ramseyp/images/khan.jpg
PAUL R. NELSONNNNNN!!!!!
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:42 PM
I don't need you to tell me how fucking good my coffee is, okay? I'm the one who buys it. I know how good it is. When Paul R. Nelson goes shopping he buys SHIT. Me, I buy the gourmet expensive stuff because when I drink it I want to taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It AIN'T Paul R. Nelson, it's the dead ****** in my garage.
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:43 PM
When you're dealing with a store like this, they're insured up the ass. They're not supposed to give you any resistance whatsoever. If you get a customer, or an employee, who thinks he's Paul R. Nelson, take the butt of your gun and smash their nose in.
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 04:44 PM
<A HREF="http://paulrnelson.com/sbcc/personalinfo.php?page=biography&seq=13">Paul R. Nelson T-Shirts, $10!!!</A>
What am I doing wrong?
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:44 PM
That cat Paul R. Nelson's a baaaad mother-
SHUT YO' MOUF!
I'm just talkin' 'bout Paul R. Nelson!
Well we can dig it!
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:45 PM
http://www.southwestern.edu/~ramseyp/images/khan.jpg
PAUL R. NELSONNNNNN!!!!!
"You Klingon Bastard...you killed my Paul R Nelson!"
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 04:46 PM
Are you calling me on the cellular phone? I don't know you. Who is this? Don't come here, I'm hanging up the phone! Paul R. Nelson, Paul R. Nelson!
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:46 PM
What am I doing wrong?
you're using html, you can't use html
you have to use the code of the board, there are [ URL="http://yourURLhere" ]http://yourURLhere[ /URL ]
just remove the extra spaces
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 04:46 PM
Link? Youtube?
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:47 PM
You wanna buy a Paul...R Nelson?
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:48 PM
"I know what you're thinking, did he fire 5 shots, or 6. Well in all the confusion, I kinda lost track myself. But being this is the 357 Paul R Nelson, the most powerful handgun in the world and can blow your head clean off, ou have to ask yourself a question, do you feel lucky...WELL, DO YA PAUL?
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:50 PM
"whooooooooo.....lives In A Pineapple Under The Sea...paul R Nelson!"
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 04:50 PM
I really like thinking about Paul R. Nelson. But then what?
fandango86
10-26-2006, 04:51 PM
http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/7606/vaderpb0.jpg
Obi Wan never told you what happened to Paul R Nelson, did he?
- He told me enough, he told me you killed him
No, I am Paul R Nelson
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 04:51 PM
HOLY SHIT !!!!!
6 pages in 3 hours.
:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 04:52 PM
In Paul R Nelson we trust.
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 04:52 PM
you're using html, you can't use html
you have to use the code of the board, there are [ URL="http://yourURLhere" ]http://yourURLhere[ /URL ]
just remove the extra spaces
Too complicated for me. Thanks.
I'm a simple man, I like a lollipop in my mouth and Pau R. nelsen in my ass, but that's just me.
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:52 PM
"I accept full responsibility and will apologize to Lord Vader myself..."
"Apology accepted, Paul R Nelson"
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 04:54 PM
Paul R Nelson never gets that picture!!!It'll make 'im a big star, and I'm gonna run him out of the business!!
Palerider4146
10-26-2006, 04:55 PM
For WNBC channel 4 news, I'm Paul R. Nelson.
(tri staters should get this one)
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:55 PM
If i had a tumor, I would name it Paul R Nelson
My name is Paul R Nelson. This is my neighborhood; this is my street; this is my life. I am 42 years old; in less than a year I will be dead. Of course I don't know that yet, and in a way, I am dead already.
fandango86
10-26-2006, 04:56 PM
http://img419.imageshack.us/img419/2300/krutombstone03ka3.jpg
Tell 'em I'm coming, and PAUL R NELSON'S coming with me!!
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 04:56 PM
<Fez's Jan Brady voice>Paul R Nelson, Paul R Nelson, Paul R Nelson!<Fez's Jan Brady voice>
Palerider4146
10-26-2006, 04:57 PM
How do you shoot Paul R. Nelson?
Easy, you dont lead him so much.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 04:57 PM
Too complicated for me. Thanks.
I'm a simple man, I like a lollipop in my mouth and Pau R. nelsen in my ass, but that's just me.
you can use html, it's not that different. There are tool bar buttons above where you enter your entry, one is a globe with a chain, click on that and then paste the URL in the dialoge box that comes up.
hehateme
10-26-2006, 04:57 PM
PAUL----- ahAHHHHHHHH - saviour of the universe
PAUL------R NELSONNNNN - he'll save ev'ry one of us
Seemingly there is no reason for these
Extraordinary intergalactical upsets (ha ha ha)
What's happening flash?
Only dr hans zarkov formerly at n a s a
Has provided any explanation
PAUL------R NELSONNNNN - he's a miracle
This mornings unprecedented solar eclipse
Is no cause for alarm
PAUL------R NELSONNNNN - king of the impossible
He's for ev'ry one of us
Stand for ev'ry one of us
He'll save with a mighty hand
Ev'ry man ev'ry woman ev'ry child
With a mighty flash
General kaka Paul R Nelson approaching
What do you mean Paul R Nelon approaching?
Open fire all weapons
Dispatch war rocket ajax to bring back his body
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:00 PM
http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/8463/pf08vo0.jpg
I love you, Paul R Nelson
-And I love you, Honey Bunny
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:01 PM
He is immortal, born in the Highlands of Scotland four hundred years ago. He is not alone. There are others like him, some good, some evil. For centuries he has battled the forces of Darkness, with Holy Ground his only refuge. He cannot die, unless you take his head and with it, his power. In the end there can be only one. He is Paul R Nelson, the Highlander.
ShavedLebaneseBear
10-26-2006, 05:03 PM
Paul R. Nelson can't go down with three barrels on him...not THREE!
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 05:03 PM
The Paul R Nelson Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:03 PM
http://img55.imageshack.us/img55/5575/apocalypsenowsmelllikevqs6.jpg
I love the smell of Napalm in the morning. Smells like...Paul R Nelson
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 05:05 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/T_shirt_006_7095_1_2_6632.jpg
FAngel
10-26-2006, 05:06 PM
You better get your head and your ass wired together, or PAUL R NELSON will take a giant shit on you!
Son, all I've ever asked of my Marines is that they obey my word as they would the word of PAUL R NELSON.
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:07 PM
http://img57.imageshack.us/img57/5711/nortonspideystilljj8.jpg
Paul R Nelson STINKS, and I don't like him!
dirt65
10-26-2006, 05:07 PM
I'm Paul R. Nelson and I don't like knitters
batgoat
10-26-2006, 05:08 PM
The Paul R Nelson Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.
Zoolander! :clap: :clap: :clap:
Stu Nahan: What about Paul R. Nelson and Paul R. Nelson?
Spicoli: Those guys are fags!!!!
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:11 PM
Behold the Metatron! Herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true Paul R Nelson!
No pleasure, no rapture, no exquisite sin greater, than Paul R Nelson.
Ted the Poster
10-26-2006, 05:12 PM
"Nobody makes Paul R. Nelson bleed his own blood - NOBODY!"
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:14 PM
You hear that Mr. Anderson, that is the sound of...inevitability
My name...is Paul R Nelson
blogzilla
10-26-2006, 05:15 PM
Paul R Nelson gets shirts. Don't make a fu***** maniac out of me!
Dr. Hoffman
10-26-2006, 05:15 PM
From the SNL Bill Brasky clips:
* "Paul R. Nelson is the father of every kid in this town!"
* "Did I ever tell you about the time Paul R. Nelson took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Paul R. Nelson takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half — until sure enough, someone constructs a bar around us. Well, the day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Paul R. Nelson yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found 'em!'"
* "The story of Johnny Appleseed is based on Paul R. Nelson... except for the part about planting apple trees... and not ****** men."
* "Did I ever tell you about the time Paul R. Nelson went hunting? Paul R. Nelson decides he's going to hunt down all four of the Banana Splits. He stalks and kills every one of them with a machete. They all begged for their lives...except Fleegle."
* "I remember one time, Paul R. Nelson took his family to SeaWorld...They were watching Shamu the whale and Paul R. Nelson got splashed. So Paul R. Nelson yells, 'I'm Paul R. Nelson and no one gets me wet!' So he climbs into the tank, grabs Shamu and throws the whale into the audience, splashes him and yells, 'Now how do you like it?' And then damn if Paul R. Nelson didn't step in there and finish the show."
* "We once had a bachelor party for Paul R. Nelson. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper in it."
* "Paul R. Nelson's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Neil Armstrong."
* "Paul R. Nelson named the group Sha Na Na. They did not want to be called that."
* "If you drop a phonograph needle on Paul R. Nelson's nipple, it plays the Beach Boys' Pet Sounds."
* "Did I ever tell you about the time he taught his son how to drive? He did it by entering him in the Indy 500. The kid wrecked and died. Paul R. Nelson said it would've happened sometime."
Ron Kind
10-26-2006, 05:17 PM
and I voted to let illegal immigrants strap electrodes to your preteen daughters' clitorii in order to fund terrorist flag burning parties and gay circle jerk extravaganzas. Please vote for me this November.
I'm Ron Kind, and I approve of this message.
Palerider4146
10-26-2006, 05:20 PM
The newest show to the FreeFm lineup...JV and the Paul R. Nelson show.
(This message is not approved by elvis).
I'll bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck Paul R. Nelson in the ass and not even have the goddam common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you.
Tonight, you men will sleep with your rifles. You will give your rifle a girl's name because this is the only pussy you people are going to get. Your days of finger-banging ol' Paul R. Nelson through his pertty pink panties are over!
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:21 PM
Don't.......Don't chew do that!!...Don't chew do that!!
I've got no where else to Paul R. Nelson!!....I've got no where else to Paul R. Nelson!!
http://www.destinationhollywood.com/celebrities/richardgere/images/richardgere_officer_04.jpg
"Ever...seen a grown man Paul R. Nelson?"
http://img127.imageshack.us/img127/5629/airplanetwo85sp0.jpg
You made a time machine...out of a Paul R. Nelson?
http://img80.imageshack.us/img80/8172/01bttfdw3.jpg
LOL
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:22 PM
http://img235.imageshack.us/img235/1633/shawox0.jpg
You know, the thing about Paul R Nelson... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes
Furtherman
10-26-2006, 05:23 PM
Paul R. Nelson moved the headstones. But not the bodies!
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:25 PM
Greg Marmalard: What do you intend to do sir? Delta's already on paul r nelson.
Dean Vernon Wormer: They are?
Greg Marmalard: Yes, Sir.
Dean Vernon Wormer: Oh. Then as of this moment, they're on DOUBLE SECRET Paul R Nelson!
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 05:26 PM
He called Replicants skin-jobs, he was the same kind of guy who in the 20th century called black people Paul R Nelson.
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 05:26 PM
http://img235.imageshack.us/img235/1633/shawox0.jpg
You know, the thing about Paul R Nelson... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes
:clap: :clap: :clap:
bryanswafford
10-26-2006, 05:26 PM
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e5/bryanswafford/uhf.jpg
Oh, Paul R. Nelson, you've just found the marble in the oatmeal. You're a lucky, lucky, lucky little boy. 'Cause you know why? You get to drink from... the FIRE HOOOOOSE!
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:26 PM
http://img347.imageshack.us/img347/4238/indysd6.jpg
Paul R Nelson. Why did it have to be Paul R Nelson?!?
nolajersey
10-26-2006, 05:27 PM
I'm starving. Earl we got any Paul R Nelson back there?
(this was probably done already but I am tired)
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:27 PM
Larry: I lied to you before. I've never done this before.
Clorette: Done what?
Larry: Done what I think we're about to do.
Clorette: It's ok. besides, I lied to you too...I'm only Paul R Nelson!
Jimmy's Dignity
10-26-2006, 05:27 PM
http://www.movieactors.com/freezeframes5/BlazeSaddle141.jpeg
Where's the Paul R. Nelson at?
StinkyHookerAss
10-26-2006, 05:28 PM
http://www.paulrnelson.com
He has a blog and a nice comments section.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:28 PM
I'm starving. Earl we got any Paul R Nelson back there?
(this was probably done already but I am tired)
doesn't matter, still funny
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:30 PM
http://img513.imageshack.us/img513/7392/shiningxl6.jpg
HEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRE'S PAUL R NELSON![/SIZE]
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 05:31 PM
"Nobody puts Paul R. Nelson in a corner."
mr.lance
10-26-2006, 05:31 PM
This Just in the Mayor of boston Paul R Nelson is dead.
Ur Listen To ManTown With LB and Paul R Nelson.
Fez Loves Paul R Nelson . Anthony Sister.
fireguy83
10-26-2006, 05:32 PM
Paul R. Nelson Facts:
Guns dont kill people, opponents of Paul R. Nelson kill people....by having abortions.
Paul R. Nelson is hockey dad.
Paul R. Nelson does not shower, piss, or have sex because he would have to see his penis and only gay people want to look at penis's.
Paul R. Nelson supports the final solution
Remember Ron Kind wants your sons to marry other peoples sons.
batgoat
10-26-2006, 05:32 PM
Paul R. Nelson likes peanut butter, You know it, I know it, the American people know it.
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:34 PM
http://img314.imageshack.us/img314/8601/jodiefostersilence06tu4.jpg
Paul R Nelson said...'I can smell your cunt.'
leiden
10-26-2006, 05:34 PM
"a conglomerated, mulatta, PAUL R. NELSON RACE!"
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:34 PM
"This ring...this ring...two Paul R. Nelson
This watch... three Paul R. Nelson."
http://www.physcoproductions.com/oscars/1990s/pics/schindlerslist3.jpg
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 05:36 PM
A conglomerated, mulotta, MONGREL class of Paul R Nelson.
Edit: didn't see that leiden.
dirt65
10-26-2006, 05:37 PM
Relax, all right? My old man is Paul R. Nelson, he's got this ultimate set of tools. I can fix it.
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:37 PM
"Paul R. Nelson....Paul R. Nelson please."
http://www.bsospirit.com/comentarios/images/lastcrusade/16.jpg
Jimmy's Dignity
10-26-2006, 05:37 PM
Elwood: It's 106 miles to Paul R. Nelson, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses
Jake: Hit it.
Hey Paul R. Nelson...you wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:41 PM
It puts the paul r nelson on it's skin or else it gets the hose again
dirt65
10-26-2006, 05:42 PM
All they got from Paul R. Nelson was protection from other guys looking to rip them off. That's what it's all about. That's what the FBI can never understand - that what Paul R. Nelson and the organization offer is protection for the kinds of guys who can't go to the cops. They're like the police department for wiseguys.
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:42 PM
http://img232.imageshack.us/img232/7218/quentintarantinotx2.jpg
Did you see a sign out in front of my house that said Paul R Nelson Storage?
- No. I didn't.
You know WHY you didn't see that sign? 'Cause it ain't there, 'cause storing Paul R Nelson ain't my fucking business, that's why!
Its A Hemi
10-26-2006, 05:43 PM
And the first thing that flashed into my gulliver was that I'd like to have Paul R. Nelson right down there on the floor with the old in-out, real savage.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:44 PM
you know what they call a paul r nelson in france?
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 05:47 PM
"So what are you Jacob? A faithless preacher? Or a mean motherfucking servant of Paul R. Nelson?"
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:47 PM
http://img74.imageshack.us/img74/2254/godfatherxb4.jpg
She was beautiful; she was young; she was innocent. She was the greatest piece of ass I've ever had, and I've had 'em all over the world. And then Paul R Nelson comes along with his olive oil voice and guinea charm, and she runs off. She threw it all away just to make me look ridiculous! And a man in my position can't afford to be made to look ridiculous!
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:47 PM
"I'm pretty fucken far from Paul R. Nelson."
http://www.gonemovies.com/WWW/WanadooFilms/Misdaad/PulpButhMarsellus.jpg
fireguy83
10-26-2006, 05:47 PM
Sir, the only way you are going to get rid of Paul R. Nelson is with this special shampoo and this tiny comb.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:48 PM
"I'm pretty fucken far from Paul R. Nelson."
http://www.gonemovies.com/WWW/WanadooFilms/Misdaad/PulpButhMarsellus.jpg
get the paul r nelson
but the paul r nelson is asleep
then wake him up
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:48 PM
"Paul R. Nelson Fight!!!!!"
http://content.answers.com/main/content/img/webpics/john_belushi.jpg
fandango86
10-26-2006, 05:50 PM
http://img511.imageshack.us/img511/1715/sonnyue5.jpg
I don't want Paul R Nelson coming out of that toilet with just his dick in his hands, alright?
Budyzir
10-26-2006, 05:50 PM
All your base are belong to Paul R. Nelson.
You are on the way to destruction.
You have no chance to survive make your time.
HA HA HA HA ..
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 05:51 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/Reilly-Twiggy.jpg
Paul R Nelson Reilly
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:52 PM
"Do it for Paul R. Nelson!!"
http://www.lostinthepast.net/motion/Outside/out0736.jpg
nofate301
10-26-2006, 05:54 PM
Write this on a rock, paul r nelson
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:56 PM
"Can you Paul R. Nelson me now....good."
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v480/grandpachuck/journal/canyouhearmenow.jpg
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 05:58 PM
"Where's the Paul R. Nelson?!?!"
http://www.tournamentofstuff.com/tos4pics/clarapeller.JPG
fireguy83
10-26-2006, 05:59 PM
http://comedian.dk/Borat-new.jpg
This my friend Paul R. Nelson, I come here for massage and, how you say? Hand relief. Every Thursday, he clean my hole.
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:01 PM
Say hello to Paul R. Nelson
http://img158.imageshack.us/img158/4269/g767636scarfacejm9.jpg
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:06 PM
When I get angry, Paul R. Nelson gets upset. And when Paul R. Nelson gets upset... people die!:icon_evil
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 06:06 PM
http://www.midnightassassinsgroup.net/opieandanthony/band.jpg
fandango86
10-26-2006, 06:08 PM
I'm gonna tell you a story. A kid named Paul R Nelson lives 30 miles north of here. He'd just taken his girlfriend home and was walking along the road. A truck pulls up beside him. Four white boys took him for a ride. Now Paul R Nelson, he headn't done anything, except be a Nelson.
They took him to a shack, a regular old shack like this one. Then they took out a razor blade. Ragged old razor blade, like this one. They pulled down his pants, they spread his legs, and they sliced off his scrotum. Then they put it in a coffee cup, like this one.
Mayor, do you know how much you bleed when someone cuts off your balls?
HUH! When they found Paul R Nelson, he looked like he had been dipped in blood up to his waist. He was barely alive when they got him to the hospital, and he can barely walk now.
LucaBrazzi77
10-26-2006, 06:10 PM
quote from bruce dickenson, famous music producer:
"I got a fever, and the cure is more Paul R. Nelson"
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 06:11 PM
http://www.snoopy.com/comics/peanuts/greatpumpkin/images/scene_5_large.gif
"There he is! There he is! It's Paul R. Nelson! He's rising out of the pumpkin patch!"
batgoat
10-26-2006, 06:12 PM
http://images.encarta.msn.com/xrefmedia/sharemed/targets/video/T627629A.jsm
Paul R Nelson....Paul R. Nelson....
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:13 PM
There is no racial bigotry here. We do not look down on shoogies, kikes, wops or Paul R. Nelson. Here, you are all equally worthless.
Hell, I like you, you can come over to my house and fuck Paul R. Nelson.
Paul R. Nelson, you had best unfuck yourself and start shitting me Tiffany cufflinks or I will definitely fuck you up!
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 06:15 PM
Take the Paul R. Nelson, leave the cannolis.
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:17 PM
I'm funny how? I mean funny like I'm Paul R. Nelson, I amuse you?...Funny how? How am I funny?
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 06:20 PM
http://img419.imageshack.us/img419/2300/krutombstone03ka3.jpg
Tell 'em I'm coming, and PAUL R NELSON'S coming with me!!
:clap: I love that one.
http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/7229/spicolilargezt6.jpg
Learning about Paul R. Nelson, and having some food.
http://img238.imageshack.us/img238/2876/shine7smallzl8.jpg
Paul R. Nelson is a little boy that lives in my mouth.
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 06:20 PM
This thread is on Steve.
batgoat
10-26-2006, 06:20 PM
http://foros.eluniversal.com.mx/blogs/imagenes/Nelson_Muntz_rie2.jpg
PAUL R.-NELSON!
greasy48
10-26-2006, 06:20 PM
I see your Paul R. Nelson is as big as mine
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:21 PM
If another letter from school goes to Paul R. Nelson house, in the fucking oven you're goin, head first.
greasy48
10-26-2006, 06:22 PM
Paul R. Nelson tear down that wall
greasy48
10-26-2006, 06:23 PM
You know Paul R. Nelson could've been a model?!?
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:25 PM
Paul R. Nelson held a gun to his head, and my father assured him that either his brains or his signature would be on the contract.
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:26 PM
Paul R. Nelson sleeps with the fishes
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 06:28 PM
"I'm Paul R. Nelson, fuckface!"
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 06:28 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/smails.jpg
You tell Paul R Nelson I'm gunning for him, if he's as good as he says he is he'll have to play me to prove it.
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 06:30 PM
http://img61.imageshack.us/img61/5578/100okeefeux4.jpg
You're not a bad-looking man, Paul R. Nelson. When I get out, I'm gonna come visit you. Have some real fun!
RobeSoup&Tears
10-26-2006, 06:30 PM
Look how they massacred my Paul R Nelson
FAngel
10-26-2006, 06:30 PM
http://www.ars.pl/images/filmy/sling_blade.gif
"Well that didn't seem right to me, so I went in the shed and got me a shoe box and emptied out all the washers and nuts and screws that were in it and I takened the little fellar and put PAUL R NELSON inside the box and buried him right there in a corner of the yard. That seemed more proper to me, I reckon."
caulfield
10-26-2006, 06:30 PM
"Listen kid, I'm not gonna bullshit you, all right? I don't give a good fuck what you know, or don't know, but I'm gonna torture you anyway, regardless. Not to get information. It's amusing, to me, to torture a Paul R Nelson. You can say anything you want cause I've heard it all before. All you can do is pray for a quick death, which you ain't gonna get."
"Last night, Paul R Nelson came down from planet Vulcan and told me that if I didn't take Pat Battle out that he'd melt my brain."
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 06:32 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/taxidriver2_jpg.jpg
Are you talking to Paul R Nelson? Well there's no one else here. So you must be talking to Paul R Nelson.
Major Burns
10-26-2006, 06:33 PM
"I want you to go in that bag, and find my wallet."
"Which one is it?"
"It's the one that says Paul R. Nelson."
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:36 PM
Boys, lets be reasonable. This is not the time or the place to be performing some kind of a, half-assed autopsy on the fish! And I am not going to stand here, and see that thing cut open, and see that little Paul R Nelson boy spill out all over the dock!
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 06:36 PM
http://www.nullstream.com/archives/cs_seas2pics_9.jpg
"I'm Paul R. Nelson, bitch!"
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 06:38 PM
http://img110.imageshack.us/img110/264/kindergardencop9pc7.jpg
I'm a cop you idiot! I'm Detective Paul R. Nelson!
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:40 PM
Don't sell yourself short, Paul R. Nelson. You're a tremendous slouch
Hey, Paul R. Nelson what are you takin' pictures for? It's a parking lot! This is a restricted club, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish
FAngel
10-26-2006, 06:41 PM
http://www.alicia-logic.com/capsimages/ww_013.jpg
"You get NOTHING! You LOSE! Good day, Paul R Nelson!"
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 06:47 PM
Paul R Nelson take me to the Waldorf-Astoria
Palerider4146
10-26-2006, 06:49 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/Reilly-Twiggy.jpg
Paul R Nelson Reilly
This one wins it for me, nice job sir.
mightymalachi
10-26-2006, 06:52 PM
Mama always said, life is like a box of Paul R. Nelson.
ChickenHawk
10-26-2006, 06:56 PM
I don't know if anyone's mentioned this yet, but can someone explain to me the constant and repetitive rainforest animal sounds in the background of the anti-Ron Kind ad?
wes mantooth
10-26-2006, 06:59 PM
http://images.art.com/images/products/large/10034000/10034510.jpg
"You hear me Paul R Nelson? Come out, come out, wherever you are"
MaskedSanity
10-26-2006, 07:05 PM
http://www.lasvegasweekly.com/storypix/1999_10_07/AWW.jpg
His name is Paul R. Nelson....
His name is Paul R. Nelson....
His name is Paul R. Nelson.......
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 07:06 PM
Q: What are you?! (thug)
A: I'm Paul R. Nelson!
http://img45.imageshack.us/img45/3965/200pxbatmankeatonfu0.jpg
I'm so glad I started this thread because I've been laughing my ass off at the shit I've been reading. Bravo folks!
FAngel
10-26-2006, 07:06 PM
Last one for me...
http://images.starpulse.com/Photos/Previews/Boondock-Saints-bh02.jpg
"First of all, I'd like to thank whichever one of you donut-munching, barrel-assed, pud-pulling sissies leaked this to the press. That's all we need now: some sensational story in the papers making these guys out to be superheroes, triumphing over evil. Let me squash the rumors right now: These two are not heroes. They're just two ordinary men who were put in an extraordinary situation and just happened to come out on top. Yes, nothing from our far-reaching computer system has turned up diddly on these two. All we know is what we found out from the neighbors, and the general consensus is, they're angels. But angels don't kill. And we have two bodies in the morgue that look like they've been 'serial-crushed by some huge friggin' PAUL R NELSON.'"
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 07:07 PM
You had me at Paul R. Nelson
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 07:08 PM
You like ice cream, Paul R. Nelson?
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 07:08 PM
What u talkin' bout Paul R. Nelson?
hehateme
10-26-2006, 07:11 PM
http://utenti.quipo.it/domine/startrek/mccoy.jpg
Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not Paul R Nelson
Dr. Hoffman
10-26-2006, 07:12 PM
True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team Paul R. Nelson...
Anything? Well, uh I guess I, deep down, am feeling a little confused. I mean, suddenly, you get married, and you're supposed to be this entirely different guy. I don't feel different. I mean, take yesterday for example. We were out at the Olive Garden for dinner, which was lovely. And uh, I happen to look over at a certain point during the meal and see Ron R. Nelson taking an order, and I found myself wondering what color his underpants might be. His panties. Uh, odds are they are probably basic white, cotton, underpants. But I sort of think well maybe they're silk panties, maybe it's a thong. Maybe it's something really cool that I don't even know about. You know, and uh, and I started feeling... what? what I thought we were in the trust tree in the nest, were we not?
I'd like to welcome you all to the Paul R. Nelson Freedom Festival. Now for those of you who don't know who Paul R. Nelson is, he's the very successful, very disease free gentleman standing by the mini bar. Now, courtesy of Speaker City, which is slashing prices on everything from beepers to DVD players, give a warm welcome Harrison welcome to my pal and your favorite, Ron Kind.
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 07:13 PM
PAUL-R-NELSON...PAUL-R-NELSON...PAUL-R-NELSON
That's what they cauwll me
baby bagadonuts
10-26-2006, 07:17 PM
one more time Paul R Nelson, and bang, zoom to the moon!!!
Ralph Cramden
NORTONS BAG
10-26-2006, 07:29 PM
"The Sheriff is a Paul R. Nelson"
Blazing Saddles
hehateme
10-26-2006, 07:36 PM
"The Sheriff is a Paul R. Nelson"
The sherrif is NEAR?!
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 07:44 PM
Would ya just watch the hair. Ya know, I spend a long time on my hair and Paul R. Nelson hit it; he hit my hair
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 07:48 PM
Paul R. Nelson...cigarette?
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 07:49 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/2.jpg
Paul?!? Paul R Nelson?!?
deadfruitvirus
10-26-2006, 07:50 PM
Time for audio!
The Shining (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrshining.mp3).
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 07:54 PM
Time for audio!
The Shining (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrshining.mp3).
HAHAHA you took it to the next level:clap: :clap: el oh el
ninhead
10-26-2006, 07:55 PM
Paul R. Nelson- Apply directly to the forehead.
kloraferm
10-26-2006, 07:55 PM
Time for audio!
The Shining (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrshining.mp3).
:clap: :icon_lol: That was funny
DeLLBerto
10-26-2006, 07:58 PM
You dirty rat you killed Paul R. Nelson
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 08:04 PM
The big yellow one is Paul R. Nelson
Major Burns
10-26-2006, 08:08 PM
I hope Paul R. Nelson doesn't have a heinie troll...
wes mantooth
10-26-2006, 08:08 PM
I beg you to try and listen to what Paul R Nelson is saying.
Mondo Nelson!!
wes mantooth
10-26-2006, 08:09 PM
oooohhh. I earned that Paul R Nelson.
Its A Hemi
10-26-2006, 08:15 PM
http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b212/StalinsHeros/Sherrif.jpg
Hey boy, where is Paul R. Nelson at?
I AM Paul R. Nelson.
Oh, pardon me. For some reason you sounded a little taller on radio.
Earth2murf
10-26-2006, 08:20 PM
ttp://paulrnelson.com/
Turfmower
10-26-2006, 08:23 PM
To Paul R. Nelson or not to Paul R. Nelson that is the question
Oswald
10-26-2006, 08:24 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v619/Oswald/PAULRNELSON.jpg
Turfmower
10-26-2006, 08:24 PM
The House next door to me was sold to Paul R. Nelson
Nortons Dumps
10-26-2006, 08:25 PM
Have a Pual R. Nelson.... Always a good decision.
dodisman
10-26-2006, 08:26 PM
I want a liberal...no, a bleeding-heart liberal....and I want a hotdog and a negro...
You'll get Paul R. Nelson, and like it!
Major Burns
10-26-2006, 08:26 PM
Flush your XM down the toilet, buy a Sirius and go fuck Paul R. Nelson!
deadfruitvirus
10-26-2006, 08:33 PM
Two more for tonight.
The Graduate (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrgraduate.mp3)
Pulp Fiction (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrfiction.mp3)
Hardcore Pride
10-26-2006, 08:41 PM
Anyone else feel like totally drilling this bit into the ground? :icon_mrgr
I think its great. :clap: Keep on Keepin' on.
davemanic
10-26-2006, 08:47 PM
Uuuuuuuhhhhhhmmmmffff, ooof, I think I just dropped a Paul R Nelson.
{Flush**
dodisman
10-26-2006, 08:51 PM
http://img247.imageshack.us/img247/983/nelsonqc4.gif
WOWmagnet
10-26-2006, 09:01 PM
"Never underestimate the Paul R. Nelson in my head."
:action-sm
fkent484
10-26-2006, 09:37 PM
Run Paul R. Nelson, Run.
You want Paul R. Nelson? You can't handle Paul R. Nelson!
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 09:39 PM
(((Paul R. Nelson))) Are You On?
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 09:41 PM
We Are...the Wild And Crazy Paul R. Nelsons!!!
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 09:45 PM
Two more for tonight.
The Graduate (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrgraduate.mp3)
Pulp Fiction (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrfiction.mp3)
ya cracking me up with your audio:clap: :icon_mrgr
YaHearIHearMe
10-26-2006, 09:46 PM
May the Paul R. Nelson be with you
Beeman99
10-26-2006, 09:51 PM
His damn voice is annoying as fuck, but if I was an american and it was a choice between Nelson and Kind, I'd vote for Nelson as he isn't a faggot lover
MeltedHelmet
10-26-2006, 09:52 PM
I went like this he went like this I said to Paul R Nelson where'd he go? He said where'd who go?
MeltedHelmet
10-26-2006, 09:54 PM
Paul R Nelson drives the boat chief
tattered
10-26-2006, 09:54 PM
Time for audio!
The Shining (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrshining.mp3).
*rings cow bell* were sending you to the big ass prize closet...what do we have for him bowl of gravy
tattered
10-26-2006, 09:55 PM
You gotta phone? you gotta fucking phone? 2 Paul R. Nelsons just stole my truck you believe that shit
Bunny™
10-26-2006, 09:56 PM
"Excuse me, could you tell me how to get back on the expressway?"
"Man, fuck yo PAUL R NELSON !"
IDidItAll
10-26-2006, 09:56 PM
http://www.dga.org/news/dgaq_1105/images/features-1105/ms1.jpg
"AGAIN!! What is your name??"
"Paul ... Paul R. Nelson!!"
GLENN_THE_TOOL
10-26-2006, 10:02 PM
"Cage goes in the water, you go in the water. Paul R. Nelson's in the water. Our Paul R. Nelson."
NightStalker3
10-26-2006, 10:04 PM
The Captain wired in he had water coming in
And the good ship and crew was in peril
And later that night when his lights went out of sight
Came The Wreck of the Paul R. Nelson
Plunkies
10-26-2006, 10:07 PM
Abbott: Paul R. Nelson's on first, Paul R. Nelson's on second, Paul R. Nelson is on third...
Costello: That's what I want to find out.
Abbott: I say Paul R. Nelson's on first, Paul R. Nelson's on second, Paul R. Nelson's on third.
Costello: Are you the manager?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: You gonna be the coach too?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names?
Abbott: Well I should.
Costello: Well then Paul R. Nelson's on first?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: I mean the fellow's name.
Abbott: Paul R. Nelson.
Costello: The guy on first.
Abbott: Paul R. Nelson.
Costello: The first baseman.
Abbott: Paul R. Nelson.
Costello: The guy playing...
Abbott: Paul R. Nelson is on first!
Costello: I'm asking YOU Paul R. Nelson's on first.
Abbott: That's the man's name.
Costello: That's Paul R. Nelson's name?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's Paul R. Nelson?
Abbott: Yes.
MyKneeGrows
10-26-2006, 10:20 PM
"Well thats not fair, If Paul R Nelson gets up... We'll all get up... it'll be anarchy!"
Sack of Chisels
10-26-2006, 10:24 PM
I'm Paul R. Nelson.
voxy rotten
10-26-2006, 10:28 PM
Paul-R.-Nelson PARTY ROCK!!
Those of you from the Pittsburgh area might know my father, Paul R. Nelson, "The Lighting Fixture King", he's donated all of the lights you'll see on the camp.
TheJerseyDevil
10-26-2006, 10:35 PM
Squeal like a Paul R Nelson. <deliverance scream>
Major Burns
10-26-2006, 10:35 PM
Sorry folks, polls are closed. Paul R. Nelson out front shoulda told ya.
IDidItAll
10-26-2006, 10:37 PM
http://www.film-moments.com/pic/StarWarsV01.jpg
"Paul R. Nelson, I am your father!"
Dr. Hoffman
10-26-2006, 10:42 PM
Mac: All right, how about the "Paul R. Nelson game?"
Foster: Paul R. Nelson game? What's the record?
Mac: Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.
Foster: Ten? Starting right 'Paul R. Nelson?'
[Mac laughs - they walk up to the car, and Foster taps on the driver side]
Larry Johnson: Sorry about the...
Foster: All right Paul R. Nelson. (1) Hand over your license and registration.
[the man hands him his license]
Foster: Your registration? Hurry up Paul R. Nelson. (2)
[Mac ticks off two fingers]
Larry Johnson: Sorry.
[the man laughs a little]
Foster: Is there something funny here boy?
Larry Johnson: Oh, no.
Foster: Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?
[pause]
Foster: All right Paul R. Nelson, (3) where were we?
Larry Johnson: Excuse me, are you saying Paul R. Nelson?
Foster: Am I saying Paul R. Nelson?
[Mac puts his hands up for the fourth one, but makes an "eehhh" facial expression, as he is considering the last one]
Larry Johnson: I thought...
Foster: Don't think boy. Paul R. Nelson, (4) do you know how fast you were going?
[man laughs]
Foster: Paul R. Nelson. (5) What is so damn funny?
Larry Johnson: I could have sworn you said Paul r. Nelson.
Foster: Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?
[Mac is gut-busting laughing]
Foster: Am I drinking milk from a saucer?
[feigned anger]
Foster: Do you see me eating mice?
Foster: [Mac and the man are laughing their heads off now] You stop laughing right Pau R. Nelson! (6)
Larry Johnson: [the man stops and swallows hard] Yes sir.
Foster: Paul R. Nelson, (7) I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts Paul R. Nelson. (8) It's the law.
[rips off the ticket and hands it to the man]
Foster: Not so funny Paul R. Nelson, (9) is it?
Foster: [Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows] Paul R. Nelson! (10)
jules
10-26-2006, 10:42 PM
the house next door to me has been sold to Paul R. Nelson-
(sorry if someone said it already-didnt read entire thread:icon_mrgr )
IDidItAll
10-26-2006, 10:44 PM
the house next door to me has been sold to Paul R. Nelson-
(sorry if someone said it already-didnt read entire thread:icon_mrgr )
:action-sm
No prob. Great minds think alike.
jules
10-26-2006, 10:47 PM
:action-sm
No prob. Great minds think alike.
:clap: all credit to you sir-:clap:
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 10:47 PM
Mac: All right, how about the "Paul R. Nelson game?"
Foster: Paul R. Nelson game? What's the record?
Mac: Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.
Foster: Ten? Starting right 'Paul R. Nelson?'
[Mac laughs - they walk up to the car, and Foster taps on the driver side]
Larry Johnson: Sorry about the...
Foster: All right Paul R. Nelson. (1) Hand over your license and registration.
[the man hands him his license]
Foster: Your registration? Hurry up Paul R. Nelson. (2)
[Mac ticks off two fingers]
Larry Johnson: Sorry.
[the man laughs a little]
Foster: Is there something funny here boy?
Larry Johnson: Oh, no.
Foster: Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?
[pause]
Foster: All right Paul R. Nelson, (3) where were we?
Larry Johnson: Excuse me, are you saying Paul R. Nelson?
Foster: Am I saying Paul R. Nelson?
[Mac puts his hands up for the fourth one, but makes an "eehhh" facial expression, as he is considering the last one]
Larry Johnson: I thought...
Foster: Don't think boy. Paul R. Nelson, (4) do you know how fast you were going?
[man laughs]
Foster: Paul R. Nelson. (5) What is so damn funny?
Larry Johnson: I could have sworn you said Paul r. Nelson.
Foster: Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?
[Mac is gut-busting laughing]
Foster: Am I drinking milk from a saucer?
[feigned anger]
Foster: Do you see me eating mice?
Foster: [Mac and the man are laughing their heads off now] You stop laughing right Pau R. Nelson! (6)
Larry Johnson: [the man stops and swallows hard] Yes sir.
Foster: Paul R. Nelson, (7) I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts Paul R. Nelson. (8) It's the law.
[rips off the ticket and hands it to the man]
Foster: Not so funny Paul R. Nelson, (9) is it?
Foster: [Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows] Paul R. Nelson! (10)
I love that Paul R Nelson movie!!!! Hehe
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 10:48 PM
<french accent><No Homo>I'm horny for Paul R Nelson</No Homo></french accent>
Arch Stanton
10-26-2006, 10:50 PM
I Paul R Nelson'd my pants and there's not a thing you can do about it
I've got 7 Paul R Nelson's in my ass and there's room for 8
Boy howdy my Paul R Nelson hurts
I Got a fever and the only prescription is more Paul R Nelson
I gotta have more Paul R Nelson
jules
10-26-2006, 10:54 PM
this might be the greatest bit ever!!
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 10:54 PM
Does anybody remember Paul R Nelson?
And a man in my position can't afford to be made to look Paul R Nelson!
Beyond AM, Beyond FM, it's Paul R Nelson Satellite Radio!
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 10:55 PM
I've got a fever and the only cure is more Paul R. Nelson
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 10:58 PM
Opie: You know I could have been a model?!?
Anthony: I'm ga-a-ay!
James Norton: I like yoooogurt...
Paul R Nelson: beep beep beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
FezPaul
10-26-2006, 11:01 PM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/ty_webb.jpg
Do you know what that golfer's name was Danny?
Bob Hope?
Hehehe No, it was Paul R Nelson, he was a good golfer.
Its A Hemi
10-26-2006, 11:01 PM
http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b212/StalinsHeros/Humungous.jpg
Greetings from Paul R. Nelson! The Lord Paul R. Nelson! The Warrior of the Wasteland! The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla!
FAngel
10-26-2006, 11:03 PM
Had to do another...
http://www.solarnavigator.net/films_movies_actors/actors_films_images/jeff_goldblum.jpg
"That is one big pile of Paul R Nelson."
23 Skidoo
10-26-2006, 11:05 PM
Paul R. Nelson, get your damn hands off her
Angelfuck
10-26-2006, 11:06 PM
"What does Paul R. Nelson look like?"
Pulp Fiction (http://audio.101megahertz.com/paulrfiction.mp3)
"Yes you did. Yes you did, Brett. You tried to fuck him. And Paul R. Nelson don't like to be fucked by anybody, except Mrs. Nelson."
bravo on the audio sir:action-sm
23 Skidoo
10-26-2006, 11:11 PM
One Paul R. Nelson's looking left, one Paul R. Nelson's looking right,and the Paul R. Nelson in the middle is saying whaddaya want from me?
MyKneeGrows
10-26-2006, 11:13 PM
"Ahhh, P B and J With The Crusts Cut Off, Who'd Your Mom Marry Paul R Nelson?"
LetsDoThisLucas
10-26-2006, 11:13 PM
My name is Paul R Nelson...
Father to a murdered son...
Husband to a murdered wife...
and I will have my vengence in this life or the next
Dr. Hoffman
10-26-2006, 11:13 PM
Mayor: Now Drebin, I don't want any trouble like you had on the South Side like last year, that's my policy.
Frank: Well, when I see Paul R. Nelson dressed in a toga, stabbing a man in the middle of the park in front of a full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastard, that's my policy.
Mayor: That was a Shakesphere In The Park Production of Julius Caesar, you moron! You killed Paul R. Nelson! Good one!
TimHorton
10-26-2006, 11:14 PM
Ever since i was a kid I wanted to be Paul R. Nelson ( You know I 'd go from rags to riches)
Oh my god you look like a politician
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 11:14 PM
Is this the Make-a-Wish foundation? It's my son's dying wish to see Paul R. Nelson give me a blowjob!
Sidekick Dave
10-26-2006, 11:15 PM
Paul R. Nelson, put your goddamn clothes back on!
dodisman
10-26-2006, 11:16 PM
Now you listen to me, you smooth talking son-of-a-bitch. Let me lay it on the line for you and your boss, whoever he is. PAUL R. NELSON will never get that senate seat. I don't care how many dago guinea wop greaseball congressmen come out of the woodwork!
TimHorton
10-26-2006, 11:17 PM
I'm Paul R. Nelson and you're not
gromble
10-26-2006, 11:18 PM
Have you ever danced with Paul R Nelson in the pale moonlight ?
Sack of Chisels
10-26-2006, 11:18 PM
This bit lacks any creativity that the Pat Battle thread had, but I still love it.
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 11:18 PM
Kilgore: I love the smell of napalm in the morning. You know, one time we had a hill bombed, for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink body. The smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole hill. Smelled like... Paul R Nelson. Someday this war's gonna end...
dodisman
10-26-2006, 11:22 PM
Paulie R. Nelson may have moved slow, but it was only because Paulie R. Nelson didn't have to move for anybody.
Tired Rudy
10-26-2006, 11:23 PM
Well I think you should be sorry, for Christ's sake! A family member dies, and you insult Paul R. Nelson! What the hell is the matter with you anyway?
Sack of Chisels
10-26-2006, 11:25 PM
Well, fuck you, too. Fuck me, fuck you, fuck this whole city and everyone in it. Fuck the panhandlers, grubbing for money, and smiling at me behind my back. Fuck the squeegee men dirtying up the clean windshield of my car. Get a fucking job! Fuck the Sikhs and the Pakistanis bombing down the avenues in decrepit cabs, curry steaming out their pores, stinking up my day. Terrorists in fucking training. SLOW THE FUCK DOWN! Fuck the Chelsea boys with their waxed chests and pumped up biceps. Going down on each other in my parks and on my piers, jingling their dicks on my Channel 35. Fuck the Korean grocers with their pyramids of overpriced fruit and their tulips and roses wrapped in plastic. Ten years in the country, still no speaky English? Fuck the Russians in Brighton Beach. Mobster thugs sitting in cafés, sipping tea in little glasses, sugar cubes between their teeth. Wheelin' and dealin' and schemin'. Go back where you fucking came from! Fuck the black-hatted Chassidim, strolling up and down 47th street in their dirty gabardine with their dandruff. Selling South African apartheid diamonds! Fuck the Wall Street brokers. Self-styled masters of the universe. Michael Douglas, Gordon Gekko wannabe mother fuckers, figuring out new ways to rob hard working people blind. Send those Enron assholes to jail for FUCKING LIFE! You think Bush and Cheney didn't know about that shit? Give me a fucking break! Tyco! Worldcom! Fuck the Puerto Ricans. 20 to a car, swelling up the welfare rolls, worst fuckin' parade in the city. And don't even get me started on the Dom-in-i-cans, 'cause they make the Puerto Ricans look good. Fuck the Bensonhurst Italians with their pomaded hair, their nylon warm-up suits, their St. Anthony medallions, swinging their, Jason Giambi, Louisville slugger, baseball bats, trying to audition for the Sopranos. Fuck the Upper East Side wives with their Hermes scarves and their fifty-dollar Balducci artichokes. Overfed faces getting pulled and lifted and stretched, all taut and shiny. You're not fooling anybody, sweetheart! Fuck the uptown brothers. They never pass the ball, they don't want to play defense, they take five steps on every lay-up to the hoop. And then they want to turn around and blame everything on the white man. Slavery ended one hundred and thirty seven years ago. Move the fuck on! Fuck the corrupt cops with their anus violating plungers and their 41 shots, standing behind a blue wall of silence. You betray our trust! Fuck the priests who put their hands down some innocent child's pants. Fuck the church that protects them, delivering us into evil. And while you're at it, fuck JC! He got off easy! A day on the cross, a weekend in hell, and all the hallelujahs of the legioned angels for eternity! Try seven years in fuckin' Otisville, J! Fuck Osama Bin Laden, Al Qaeda, and backward-ass, cave-dwelling, fundamentalist assholes everywhere. On the names of innocent thousands murdered, I pray you spend the rest of eternity with your seventy-two whores roasting in a jet-fuel fire in hell. You towel headed camel jockeys can kiss my royal Irish ass! Fuck Jacob Elinsky, whining malcontent. Fuck Francis Xavier Slaughtery my best friend, judging me while he stares at my girlfriend's ass. Fuck Naturelle Riviera, I gave her my trust and she stabbed me in the back, sold me up the river, fucking bitch. Fuck my father with his endless grief, standing behind that bar sipping on club sodas, selling whisky to firemen, cheering the Bronx bombers. Fuck this whole city and everyone in it. From the row-houses of Astoria to the penthouses on Park Avenue, from the projects in the Bronx to the lofts in Soho. From the tenements in Alphabet City to the brownstones in Park slope to the split-levels in Staten Island. Let an earthquake crumble it, let the fires rage, let it burn to fucking ash and then let the waters rise and submerge this whole rat-infested place.
[pause]
No. No, fuck you, Paul R. Nelson. You had it all, and you threw it away, you dumb fuck!
Dr. Hoffman
10-26-2006, 11:31 PM
Dark Helmet: Careful you idiot! I said across her nose, not up it!
Laser Gunner: Sorry sir! I'm doing my best!
Dark Helmet: Who made that man a gunner?
Major Asshole: I did sir. He's my cousin.
Dark Helmet: Who is he?
Colonel Sandurz: He's a Paul R. Nelson sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that! What's his name?
Colonel Sandurz: That is his name sir. Paul R. Nelson, Major Paul R. Nelson!
Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
Colonel Sandurz: He's a Paul R. Nelson too sir. Gunner's mate First Class Paul R. Nelson!
Dark Helmet: How many Paul R. Nelsons do we have on this ship, anyway?
[Entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand]
Entire Bridge Crew: Yo!
Dark Helmet: I knew it. I'm surrounded by Paul R. Nelson's!
[Dark Helmet pulls his face shield down]
Dark Helmet: Keep firing, Paul R. Nelson's!
dodisman
10-26-2006, 11:34 PM
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on Sunday night. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourselves. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin' else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got Paul R. Nelson?
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 11:34 PM
You think you can catch Paul R Nelson? You think a guy like that comes this close to getting caught, and sticks his head out? If he comes up for anything it'll be to get rid of me. After that... my guess is you'll never hear from him again.
nofate301
10-26-2006, 11:38 PM
Paul R Nelson, my anti drug
Easy come, easy go, will you let me go
R. Nelson!
We will not let you go
Our Paul R Nelson, who art in heaven, hallowed be they name, they kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily Paul R Nelson, and forgive us our Paul R Nelsons, as we forgive those who Paul R Nelsoned against us. And lead us not into Paul R Nelson, but deliver us from Paul R Nelson. Amen.
I hope to god this can last the weekend. The bbbboys need to recap some of this.
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 11:40 PM
Our Paul R Nelson, who art in heaven, hallowed be they name, they kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily Paul R Nelson, and forgive us our Paul R Nelsons, as we forgive those who Paul R Nelsoned against us. And lead us not into Paul R Nelson, but deliver us from Paul R Nelson. Amen.
:clap: I'm going to laugh for three days straight about this one :clap:
lanestew
10-26-2006, 11:41 PM
Paul R. Nelson for 4th mike.
Dr. Hoffman
10-26-2006, 11:42 PM
Moses: The Lord, the Lord Paul R. Nelson has given unto you these fifteen...
[drops one of the tablets]
Moses: Oy! Ten! Ten commandments for all to obey!
MoreImportantly
10-26-2006, 11:45 PM
A la tuhuelpa legria Paul R Nelson
Que tuhuelce paralla legria cosabuena
A la tuhuelpa legria Paul R Nelson
Eeeh, Paul R Nelson
A-Hai 2x
'Cause I'm Paul R. Nelson
Yes I'm the real Paul R. Nelson
All you other Paul R. Nelson's
Are just imitating,
So won't the real Paul R. Nelson please stand up?
[Lewis Black Voice] If it weren't for my Paul R. Nelson, I wouldn't have spent that year in college [/Lewis Black Voice]
lanestew
10-26-2006, 11:48 PM
Now the night of the fight, you may
fell a slight sting, that's Paul R Nelson
fuckin' wit ya. Fuck Paul R Nelson! Paul R Nelson
only hurts, he never helps. Fight
through that shit. 'Cause a year
from now, when you're kickin' it in
the Caribbean you're gonna say,
"Marsellus Wallace was right."
lil chung
10-26-2006, 11:52 PM
Can you honestly tell me you forgot? Forgot the magnetism of Robin Zander, or the charisma of Paul R Nelson?
http://www.movieprop.com/tvandmovie/reviews/fasttimeswiseguy1.jpg
IDidItAll
10-27-2006, 12:00 AM
http://www.topgun-lefilm.com/personnages/goose.jpg
"Paul R. Nelson, ya big stud. Take me to bed or lose me forever!"
FAZ8218
10-27-2006, 12:03 AM
I left my house today and this thread had 3 pages... fantastic work guys, and gals... :clap:
FAZ8218
10-27-2006, 12:11 AM
"Look kids, Big-Ben, Paul R. Nelson..."
"I'm Paul... Paul R. Nelson and I'm your density... I mean..."
"Slick: Why don't you do somebody big mouth, like Paul R. Nelson?
Mario: I can't do Paul R. Nelson!
Calogero: Yeah, that's hard."
"No, see... You're Paul R. Nelson man, I'm the Dude, so that's what you call me..."
"You can get a good look at a t-bone steak by sticking my head up a bull's ass, but wouldn't you rather take Paul R. Nelson's word for it?"
"You got any Paul R. Nelsons down there?
About the biggest pair you've ever seen dingle-berry!"
KneeKnee
10-27-2006, 12:13 AM
http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f239/acmirro/arnold.jpg
"Im Paul R. Nelson!!! Yahhhhh!!!"
Arch Stanton
10-27-2006, 12:27 AM
That's it Paul R Nelson, Get the hell out of here!
Paul R Nelson, Paul R Nelson....Drinks are on the house
Hey Ma, can I borrow this? A deer's Paul R Nelson got caught in the grill of the car
But Paul R Nelson, that's all the money we had
I want a Dr Paul R Nelson and a diablo sandwich and make it fast, I'm in a God damn hurry
There is no way..no way you come from my loins. Remind me when I get home to punch Paul R Nelson right in the mouth
OpenKnee&Anthamuny
10-27-2006, 12:28 AM
I know who you are. You're Paul R Nelson . Your dad's a Paul R Nelson . A Paul R Nelson up in the nuthouse in Togus. He took your ear and he put it to a stove and burnt it off.
You call my dad Paul R Nelson again, I'll kill you.
Paul R Nelson
Paul R Nelson
Paul R Nelson
Aaaaaa.. Im gonna rip your head off and Paul R Nelson down your neck
dire9wolf
10-27-2006, 12:30 AM
No..Paul R Nelsons health wont allow it
Oh my god, they killed Paul R Nelson!
FAZ8218
10-27-2006, 12:33 AM
Paul R. Nelson graduates! Paul R. Nelson graduates!