FU TO MY SORRY EX HUSBAND and SPERM DONAR TO MY SON

[BJQueen]

If anyone sees my ex-husband, Allan, in Ohio, please feel free to offer a big FU to him and a kick in the cunt to his wife.

I felt absolutely horrible because he tragically lost both of his parents in a house fire on Friday (it was all over local news in Ohio - London).
Unfortunatly, this bastard and I have a son together that has Allan's name. This sperm donar wanted our son to have his name at one time (and was proud) and since our divorce (like 14 years ago) has dis-owned our son (who is now 15). I (and our son) have over-looked these.
This sorry excuse for a human being was responsible for writing of the obituary of his parents. ALL of the grandchildren were mentioned except for 1. Guess who?!? How much more can you kick your own child? His excuse for what he did? "He wouldn't even know they were dead anyway" - this is the farthest from the truth. For his information, we knew the morning it occurred - and we are in Texas!

My son's Grandma Coil was the ONLY one from that side of the family that ever did keep communication with him, and now, she is gone.

Well, there will be a single rose in a vase present at the memorial service tomorrow from the forgotten one. I just hope that the rest of the family will allow my son that much.

I feel like shit for choosing such a worthless piece of skin to father my child and on top of that letting my son take his name.

I apologize for venting, but I had to get it out of my system somehow.

[wes mantooth]

That's really sad. Just assure your son that what matters is what Grandma Coil thought of him and not his sorry excuse for a father.

No need beating yourself up over something you did when you were young. Just raise your son to be a good man.



Good luck


.

[BJQueen]

http://www.10tv.com/vplayer.php?clip=2007_02_23_Fire_Claims_Couple.wmv&showpromo=adsrv.dispatch.com/RealMedia/ads/adstream_lx.ads/www.10tv.com/video/L18/1567789885/Top3/CDispatch/10tv_hatfieldhyun_video/10tv_hatfieldhyun_video/52466d42725558664c506341424a767a

http://www.dispatch.com/news-story.php?story=dispatch/2007/02/24/20070224-D1-02.html

I don't know if these links work... We'll see...

[TreeFortRichard]

They work...

Smoking w/ Oxygen...no comment.

[BJQueen]

They work...

Smoking w/ Oxygen...no comment.

Yeah, I never claimed them to be the smartest folks on this big green, blue, and white ball we call earth. If nothing else, it's a lesson to pass on?

My ex-mother-in-law had one of the biggest hearts of any woman I have had the pleasure of meeting. No matter what the issues with my ex, she ALWAYS (and so did her husband) treated me with respect. And she always kept in contact with my son.

[JoeyDVDZ]

Fuck him, Queenie. You & your boy don't need that bag of dripping rancid meat, and why should you care if he's an insensitive piece of shit? Your son's grandma knew who he was, and loved him. Nuff said.

[Three Hole Puncher]

Ahhh yes... bottled oxygen and cigarettes. They go together like pills and liquor.

[BJQueen]

Fuck him, Queenie. You & your boy don't need that bag of dripping rancid meat, and why should you care if he's an insensitive piece of shit? Your son's grandma knew who he was, and loved him. Nuff said.

You are correct, Sir. I am just pissed off that after all these years, that rotted sperm sac still hasn't grown up. It definately made me feel better venting and this seemed like the place.

Thanks for your words of encouragement. The nice thing is is the fact that my demon spawn has quite the role model for a steppappy. And with O & A influences, he is sure to be as screwed up as the rest of us, huh? :action-sm

[tstlkevanilla]

What a douchebag.

[patbattlefield]

deadbeat dads should be chemically castrated.

[Arc Lite]

Sure it's a shitty thing to do, but they are just words in a paper. Black and white. They don't compare to how cool she was to your son. Those are the memories he'll have not that he was excluded from an obit.

[Glenn Dandy]

Sue him for back support , ruin his life... He might remember his sons name if you put it accross the top of a summons:)

People are such shit, honestly... especialy when it comes to kids... makes me sick.
\

BJQ I just found out after paying my ex 16000.00 this year and two trips to jail... she hasnt paid the 40 dollarsa a month required by the state since October, and the jacket he has wasnt bought by her it was bought by the states goodwill service for poor children..

16000.00 and she couldnt buy my son a coat. and hasnt seen him in from last i heard three months.

[Fruit Monkey]

so he is in ohio and u in texas who moved and when ? lets dive right into this shall we

[Mother Shucker]

Sorry for you and more so for your son.

[BJQueen]

Sue him for back support , ruin his life... He might remember his sons name if you put it accross the top of a summons:)

People are such shit, honestly... especialy when it comes to kids... makes me sick.
\

BJQ I just found out after paying my ex 16000.00 this year and two trips to jail... she hasnt paid the 40 dollarsa a month required by the state since October, and the jacket he has wasnt bought by her it was bought by the states goodwill service for poor children..

16000.00 and she couldnt buy my son a coat. and hasnt seen him in from last i heard three months.

That sucks. My ex hasn't contacted my son in over 9 years. I have only lived in Texas for almost 5. Prior to our move to Texas, we only lived 20 minutes from eachother. When my son would try to call him, he would blow him off and say that he was too busy and would call him back - never once did he call back. After a few months of rejection, my son quit calling. My ex's Mom was the only one who continued contact with my son and that was sporadic because she felt like she was betraying her son's wishes. He has 4 other kids that he has and chose to ditch mine - so be it. It just feels like he spit on his mom's ashes by being so petty. I hope his kids never do that to him - heaven forbid something happen to him.

It just pisses me off. I know it's JUST an obit. But to a 15 year old boy, it's a major slap in the face.

[BJQueen]

so he is in ohio and u in texas who moved and when ? lets dive right into this shall we

No secret. The USAF brought us to Texas. My hubby got promoted to LT. GO BLUE! :action-sm

Oh, I have other news to come soon, but that will be left for another thread.

[BJQueen]

Do they call this "Mama Bear Syndrome"?

[circpro]

Sue him for back support , ruin his life...

and cash the checks with 'Under Protest" on the back.....

[Fruit Monkey]

No secret. The USAF brought us to Texas. My hubby got promoted to LT. GO BLUE! :action-sm

Oh, I have other news to come soon, but that will be left for another thread.


didnt think there was a secret, just more to the story, i'll put money on it that his side is completely different.

his hers and the truth

so being i have to figure this out ok u both are from ohio married a military gut ended up in texas got divorced his job took him back to ohio? im sure a few stops along the way but u stayed in texas? am i guessing right ? lets see he decided not to have contact because having contact and not seeing maybe more painful then doing the opposite but he just dumped some cum in u and ran off ?

fuckin bitter women.

get over it 15 years is long enough to move on. and im sure your 15 was checking the obits today and seen what had happend. maybe some things are better off left alone.

[BJQueen]

didnt think there was a secret, just more to the story, i'll put money on it that his side is completely different.

his hers and the truth

so being i have to figure this out ok u both are from ohio married a military gut ended up in texas got divorced his job took him back to ohio? im sure a few stops along the way but u stayed in texas? am i guessing right ? lets see he decided not to have contact because having contact and not seeing maybe more painful then doing the opposite but he just dumped some cum in u and ran off ?

fuckin bitter women.

get over it 15 years is long enough to move on. and im sure your 15 was checking the obits today and seen what had happend. maybe some things are better off left alone.

Thanks for the perspective. I am sure that there are a lot of ya out there that think I am just being a bitter woman. Bitter, yes. Woman, yes. But more important, Mother. And when my son hurts, so do I - most of you parents can relate to that much. Calling that mindless douche would be totally pointless - it's like talking to a wall - besides, he would just hang up if I tried to bitch - pointless. I might as well vent on a message board and provide at least a little entertainment at my own expense.

Good luck figuring it out - I gave that up a long time ago. The obit was just "icing on the cake" as to him still showing his lack of tact, and yet again, spitting on his own child, and it pissed me off - especially at the expense of my son.

I am almost over it. Thanks fellow WBrs for the posts. Tomorrow is closure and time to move on.

[Glenn Dandy]

I hear ya BJ,,, Its not anything besides him scorning his own child. Hes a kid, and strapped with being a kid is an undying love and connection to your parents....When a parent doesnt respect that, and does some stupid thoughtless shit to a childs mind.

they are just a piece of shit.. As an adult we are to nurture and love innocent children,they count on us not hurt them.

Hes a bad parent , no matter the circumstances.

[rustytrombone1]

What a dick....fuck him....the demon spawn's better off without that fucker in his life anyway...I say don't give the limp dicked one access to your son......ever.......and when the spawn hits it big time and the asscunthead wants back in his life to ride his coat tails---spawny boy can turn it around at tell him to fuck off!

[Sinn Fein]

What a douchebag. I hope your son kicks his ass when he's old enough.

My wife's ex is a douchebag too. He's like 10K behind on support. He basically went into hiding and worked under-the-table for a bunch of years so he wouldn't have to pay support. After he re-surfaced, there was a support hearing. He tried to intimidate/threaten her into not showing up for the hearing. No show = you lose. This was long before we were married, in fact not too long after we had met. I went with her to the hearing, which put a stop to that shit. But later on, he started asking her about me and shit and said he was going to break my neck. I'm still waiting for that, and it's been about 6 years.

Her son wants nothing to do with him and will probably fuck him up if given the chance (he's about 4 inches taller and about 100 pounds heavier). I am praying that circumstances allow this to happen. Her daughter still buys into his bullshit.

[BJQueen]

My son said it best last night, "It doesn't matter, Mom. I just know that I will NEVER treat my kids like my Dad does to me. It's just messed up."

On the flipflop....The heathen talked to my ex's grandma and it seems that there were a lot in the family unhappy with my ex for his little antics. Needless-to-say, my son's Great Grandmother (Terrie's Mom) is making sure that my son is listed for the memorial service today AND the rose will remain.

Now, I have closure. I couldn't stand the thought that my ex could actually be right when he told me years ago that no one in his family gave a rats ass about AC and no one buys that he is blood. Now I know he was wrong on that too - it wasn't just his mother that loves my son. I am just thankful that my son doesn't have to completely lose that link - for his sake.

Just cuz my ex needs to drop in a bucket of aids, doesn't mean the rest of his family is shit too.

[NoSurviivors]

My son said it best last night, "It doesn't matter, Mom. I just know that I will NEVER treat my kids like my Dad does to me. It's just messed up."

Move forward. I'm glad you both we're able to find some closure. Some of us never will.

all my best.

[Fruit Monkey]

Like I said why did you tell your son that there was no mention of him in the obit? you want him to hate his farther as much as u do. i am a parent too. and my kid lives with my x wife. not 1100 miles apart more like 11. I am sure I been called sperm donor hell i cal myself that daily.

My point is I have never spoken a bad word to my kid about my x nor have I allowed that in her presence. Unlike you i assume u ran to your kid look at what that dick of a father of yours did now.

See my x did talk shit about me in front of my kid and u know what it backfired on her.

ENJOY!

[THE FEZ MAN]

i have been keeping my mouth shut, but i have to jump on the fruit monkey band wagon here, is it at all possable that he hates you so fucking much that he would be willing to forgo the fact that he has fathered a child with you?
i have repetadly told my old lady that if she leaves, im gone, forever. when the time comes i would sit my son down and tell it like it was and why i did what i would do. i work next to a place that does court orderd famly visatation. the bull shit i see going in and out of there is rediculas

[BJQueen]

Like I said why did you tell your son that there was no mention of him in the obit? you want him to hate his farther as much as u do. i am a parent too. and my kid lives with my x wife. not 1100 miles apart more like 11. I am sure I been called sperm donor hell i cal myself that daily.

My point is I have never spoken a bad word to my kid about my x nor have I allowed that in her presence. Unlike you i assume u ran to your kid look at what that dick of a father of yours did now.

See my x did talk shit about me in front of my kid and u know what it backfired on her.

ENJOY!

I wish I could have protected him. Unfortunately he knows Google. It wasn't too difficult to find. I didn't tell him any thing. He pointed it out to me.

[BJQueen]

i have been keeping my mouth shut, but i have to jump on the fruit monkey band wagon here, is it at all possable that he hates you so fucking much that he would be willing to forgo the fact that he has fathered a child with you?
i have repetadly told my old lady that if she leaves, im gone, forever. when the time comes i would sit my son down and tell it like it was and why i did what i would do. i work next to a place that does court orderd famly visatation. the bull shit i see going in and out of there is rediculas

I suppose he could hate me that much - but to take it out on the kid? The courts gave him visitation - without me being present - I even went to the extent of the exchange being at his mom's house with my ex not even being around - just to make it smooth on my son. Eventually, the visitation was only by only by the grandparents.

Jump on whatever bandwagon ya want. Obviously, he could be tracked down with whatever information I provided in this thread - if anyone actually cares to get his side. I have nothing to hide with how I have dealt with the situations through the years. When my son was younger, it was a whole lot easier to hide the truth from him. Unfortunatley, at this age (as with most teenage boys) he seems to have a mind of his own and is rather resourceful.

I just hope that none of your kids ever have to go through such things. If your ex bashes you to your kids, she just needs to have her uterus and ovaries ripped out and tied around her neck in a little bow (okay, that was sick even for me - el oh el :icon_mrgr). When your kids get a little older, they will be able to see through all the BS she has fed them - I promise (we are already seeing that with my stepson).

[THE FEZ MAN]

i know at least 2 diffent dudes that hate there ex's so much that they totaly disowned them, and there childern, in one case there was cheating involved, the other was just that the dudes old lady was a complete fucking cunt, crazy to the extreem, in the end his son went to him to get away from his insane mother and her abuse, both physical and mental. thats how i met one of my best freinds, his mother was totaly insane, he left and found his dad who left when he was 5, moved in and never looked back.

[favourite]

I don't care what bullshit story a parent gives for not seeing their kid. (unless ya got ya ass handed a retraining order).

Your son sounds like a trooper. He'll turn out better not having a douch of a so called father in his life.

[BJQueen]

i know at least 2 diffent dudes that hate there ex's so much that they totaly disowned them, and there childern, in one case there was cheating involved, the other was just that the dudes old lady was a complete fucking cunt, crazy to the extreem, in the end his son went to him to get away from his insane mother and her abuse, both physical and mental. thats how i met one of my best freinds, his mother was totaly insane, he left and found his dad who left when he was 5, moved in and never looked back.

Fortunatly that isn't the case here. There was cheating on his part, but he is also the same bumb that got fired from a truck washing job for running up their phone bill over $1500 (THAT WAS A LOOOOOONG TIME AGO). I try to give him the benifit of the doubt - afterall, you would think after 15 years, a person would mature a bit? Guess not. Until now, my son has always given him the benefit of the doubt too - even though there hasn't been contact. In the end, he will be the one missing out - not my son. Again, it just pissed me off because of the total ignorance. I am not bitching because of abuse or cheating or any of that crap.

Your friend's ex sounds like a complete lunatic. She doesn't deserve kids. I am so glad my parents didn't bash eachother after their divorce. I wouldn't wish that one anyone - the kids only get caught in the middle.

[BJQueen]

Besides even if my ex hated me that much, there are ways to get visitation without dealing with me. Anytime we did communicate in the past it was very civil - he even got along with my hubby - just somewhere along the line, he lost it. I just think I am going to give up the hope after this latest incident. I give up.

[Sparkstalker]

Sounds a lot like my wife's "father". We've been together sixteen years, and I've seen him all of twice. Once at her graduation, and once at her grandfather's (his father's) funeral. He barely even spoke to her, other than saying hi.

And, funny enough, he lived in Ohio for a while too...