October 6th, 2004: Hoo, hoo WOW you stink!

[MAVRIC305]

The boys started the show off with yet another stumble. "Technological retards" exclaimed Opie as they just cannot not seem to get all the kinks out of the system in their new XM Satellite radio studio. In this case microphone volumes were low, and Norton's was hardly on at all. They finally got Jimmy all cued up but that was not the end of the mess that is the new Opie & Anthony show.

Later Jim goes off on a tirade about the break with the same George Carlin standup clips as yesterday. He was also pissed that he didn't get his soy latte, was it ice or hot, the guy does have more requests than a Make a wish foundation child.

They also touched on the fact that they are hated by everyone in the building all ready! The other shows on XM, like Frank's place, who lost their studio to Opie & Anthony. They seem to be a little jealous that they have a studio the size of Mel Brooks' cardboard box in Life Stinks. Fuck em'! They take the big C in the ass those fucking guinea bastards! Opie referred to the studio as the Frank's place's old girlfriend and Opie, Anthony, and Jim are taking their turns penetrating her with impunity.

Later the phone lines were a mess. The boys were just lambasting their listeners as the phones were a mess. Blaming Bill for not hearing the phone, or was it Max, or was it Washington fucking DC! Who knows, as much as we are kept in the loop by our brothers Opie & Anthony, this loop is fucking straight as an arrow, I do not even think they know what the fuck is going on in that space aged studio! Though, they found a way to praise the ever tempered Opie for maintaining his cool under all the madness in studio. On report Opie was known to have broken over $100,000 worth of equipment back at the WNEW studios, including a phone system (Ding, ding) that he smashed into the ground with great vengeance and furious anger.

Then, they finally got a call they could hear, but it was political. Far left, far right, right in the middle left of the right! Who gives a fuck!? Anthony had to once again explain how he is not backing Kerry, but he still thinks Bush and Cheney have twisted shit around so much that it had become the furthest thing from the truth. Bush is a good President, just like O & A are good on the radio. They both don't know what the fuck they are doing, but they come off doing a great job in the end. One reporters opinion, pretty fucking good point. They continued to talk Kerry/Bush and how the debate is too restricted to particular questions instead of letting them go at it. Which is what we all would rather see, not two robots with prewritten answers.

The phones are working!

They go to Chad on the well functioning phone lines. Fuck Chad, unimportant phone call. Though, the call sucked, he did pose an interesting point. The fucking background noises, Jimmy chewing, Ben laughing, etc... They received another call from some hick who said they are starting to sound a lot better, and Opie showing that he does know what he is doing puts the volume up on the caller, who sounded a tad low. They reiterated that they do have the sound clips, it's just that they are not confident they are going to come through correctly with the space aged technical machinery.... Then, they get a call from a douche nozzle who says that in one of the sweepers a man in Russian language says Opie has a long schlong. Martini Steve sashays into the studio to his theme music to answer the question, why so many gay themes with the sweepers? Steve explained that a lot of people who were interviewed spoke different languages, so he told them to say something in foreign tongue so he can turn it into a sweeper.. Bla, bla, bla... Is this too explanatory?

Later, they received a call from some hole, who muttered something and disappeared into the abyss she calls a vagina. The boys headed to break teasing Norton's Yankee Cranky, and stoner spelling bee. Then, Ben was teased for his short shirt that comes up over his bellybutton. (exaggeration) Though, Anthony thinks it looks normal to Norton's XXXL T-shirts made for a 6'9 black male. One more tease, Norton's favorite new show, the Tony Danza show...

Finally back from break, Jim starts to go off on the bullshit repeats of the Carlin standup. They find out from Wackbag's own Sexbagel, who let them know he can do nothing about it, because DC is in control what is played during break. Opie said, they can just talk through the breaks, and pop on a Regan bit to take a dump.

They get into the "Mean Daigo" as Jimmy put it, that Tony Danza really is, but instead he acts like a working mother. They start playing the "Who's the boss" theme, and Anthony explains how he gets an uncomfortable feeling when seeing repeats of that horrible show with a young preteen Allyssa Milano. When you think of Allyssa Milano you think of hot cunt with juicy titties, so watching her as a child kind of bugs you out. Norton noted that he understood, and it is kind of like a young Rickie Shroder in the champ, watching him cry "Get up, champ" knowing a few years later he would be a well-abed young blonde stud. God, I hate Norton for making me have to write that last sentence!

They got into the whole WOW sticker fiasco, and how it is taking forever for XM (Xtreme meetings) to get the stickers out to the fans. Opie just wanted to get the stickers and deliver them himself. They swerve into another direction with some dude on Immediate feedback, yes I am calling it immediate, FUCK VIACOM! Who says that he has seen Grandma box, which is a pretty fucking disgusting image to have in ones head. Cob webs, Uck! They continued after an Immediate feedback by Wackbag's Doughboy, who mentioned the two words "Century sex" which was just a gross video of an old bag getting railed. When they get the video you will all see horror at it's worst!

Before break, Norton rants again about his coffee. He does not want Ma & Pa coffee, or some Pakistani making dirt coffee. He only likes Starbucks. Then, Opie bring up the Yanks big game 1 loss to the Twins. As Opie and Ben say that this is Boston's league much to the chagrin of Jim and Ant who think there is no way Schilling could stop the curse when all the past hall of famer's could not achieve it. Opie then explains why Boston has been falling short so much, because of the lack of "Darkies" on the team. It just so happens that Boston has had a racist owner for years and never hired black help, or um players.

Norton made a boring point about how pitching wins championships and requests a slap in the face if it ever happens again... Cranky Jimmy gets us all with sidesplitting reference to an Oompa loompa motherfucker. I missed it, I do not know who he was talking about, I think it was the Frank's Place guy, but it was just funny to hear him sound so pissed off. As they head to break they tease Opie & Jim's horrible Tuesday night...

As they comeback the volume is still to low, and who has to hear it? Martini Steve, who has sounded a bit agitated at times. I really think fucking with this big man will end up being futile for some pour soul in the near future. Back to Jim's ICED soy latte, he needs it!

They finally get into the previous nights story. First, Jimmy on Levitra which makes his nose stuffy. This guy really IS a fucking mess. He takes a Zicam to clear up the stuffy nose. So, he is getting a massage and he wants to be firm for the chick performing the massage. It was not an Asian, as Jim does not like the Asians because they have expressionless faces, which you cannot tell if they are sleeping or not. Norton loves the Native American chicks who have Angelina Jolie pussy lips. As Anthony put it, Abner Louima with his head turned sideways. Hilarious... So, he is all juiced up on Levitra, and as he is getting rubbed the girl asks, "You wanna fuck?"

Interupted by Stern news, it seems Stern was losing his mind on the air. He was pissed he was not able to do his show. He was crying that he wants to walkout on the show, and go to satellite radio, hoo, hoo. Fucking follower, copycat, mimic, cocknose!

Back to the story, Norton gets golden showered. Which was called getting his medicene from his nurse. The man is addicted to sex, as Anthony explained is the lesser of evil addictions, but makes him just come off as a sick fuck. He realized he liked female piss when he was in second grade. A girl sat on his face and he realized he liked the smell, you disgusting human being.

They then went into the back of Vos' stinky ear. It is worse than Norton's bellybutton. Some thought that maybe it was Vos sticking his finger up is ass and making like it was behind his ear, but Opie approved that it is a totally genuine stink!


After the stink story, Opie explained a bit about his enema, explaining in a very grossly disgusting manner. He was Humilified by the whole thing. As Norton explained the water was glistening off of Opie's Wispy golden brown ass hair. Uck! Brother Joe chimed in about his enema experience. His Uncle joe sat on him as he administered the enema.


Norton tells Opie to Get a colonic. Opie responded with a "FUCK NO" Norton explains that he has a tight little hiney -- UCK!


I'm an innovator, hoo, hoo. We can say fuck, and you can't! Howard - HE is going to Sirius satellite radio where he will be competing with the boys head on. O & A always win in the end! Opie & Anthony are Godzilla, Howard is Japan!


Anthony just starts killing with his Howie impression.


A caller wants to know why they are not cursing every two seconds. They explain that subtext is more important than being a poopy mouth.

They also explain how Sirius had a hard-on for them, but quite frankly they are miles behind XM, and they went with the most logical choice. Sirius has a long way to go, so when Howie finally makes it to Sirius in 2006, maybe they will be ready.


Somehow, Howie is saying he is an innovator for going to Satellite, hoo, hoo, hoo! Opie knows for a fact that Howie has XM and is listening to the O & A show. Game on! It's time to talk free...


Assfuck, cumface, dickbag all invented by Howard. Also, invented shithead, to the howiecopter where I can attend Billy Joel's wedding, hoo, hoo. Look at my girlfriends fucking tits, Robin.

Give me another fucking sea breeze, HOO, HOO, HOO, HOO! Wow, Martley got fucked up the ass by me.. HOO, HOO, HOO.

Hey, BABA fucking Booey! HOO, HOO ,HOO...


Hey Robin you know your pussy looks like a wallet. I can say whatever I want I am on satellite radio now. Opie kept trying to tell Bizarro Howie that he still has to wait a year and a half before he can use foul language.


They got a call from some hayseed who hates Stern and is damn glad to have the good ol' boys on the air. He said he wanted to be one of the first to have a WOW sticker in his area. Anthony asked if he had a pick-up, the guy said yeah, Anthony added with the Dale #3 on the side, the guy replied no, kind of killing the joke, so Anthony added in Howie-style: "No wonder they drag them under trucks... Waddle doodle, I apologize, HOO, HOO"

Steve C pops on the intro to Howie's show (Rob Zombie)

Yeah, Robin have you seen my daughters huge fucking tits yet? They're huge, Robin. I can say that now I am on satellite. Howie gets rid of constipation with 10 sea breezes, Robin.

I'm like Napoleon, I make international history Robin....

Let's everyone say hello to Jimmy the Jokeman Norton.

Robert Kelly calls in to talk about Jimmy's smelly bellybutton. As Norton came to his apartment to gamble and wins the first two hands and plays the rest of the hands with the house money. So, for two bucks Robert Kelly sniffed Jimmy's bellybutton. He starts uncontrollably gagging and puking. Jimmy happens to have a camera to take snapshots of it. Robert Kelly explains how Jimmy's bellybutton Stinks like wet hamburger meat.

What did you learn on the O & A show?

When you get an enema your humilified, Rich Vos has turtle fingers, and Howie's a follower!

Love ya, Op
Love ya, Ant
Love ya, Jim