19 signs we are a crazy control freak nation

Norm Stansfield

私は亀が好きだ。
Mar 17, 2009
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#1
19 Signs That America Has Become A Crazy Control Freak Nation Where Almost Everything Is Illegal

The original story comes with links to articles about each of these 19 examples. If you're gonna post on how some of these are made up, please first go to the link that proves they aren't, and then comment.

#1 One California town is actually considering making it illegal to smoke in your own backyard.

#2 In Louisiana, a church was recently ordered to stop giving out water because it did not have a permit to do so.

#3 In the United States it is illegal to operate a train that does not have an “F” painted on the front. Apparently without that “F” we all might not know where the front of the train is.

#4 In many U.S. states is it now illegal to collect rain that falls from the sky on to your own property.

#5 In America today it is illegal to milk your cow and sell the milk to your neighbor. If you do this, there is a good chance that federal agents will raid your home at the crack of dawn.

#6 In Washington D.C. it is illegal not to recycle cat litter.

#7 It is illegal to give a tour of the monuments in Washington D.C. without a license.

#8 In the United States it is illegal to sell natural cures for cancer – even if they work.

#9 In the state of Massachusetts it is illegal to deface a milk carton.

#10 In the state of Alabama, bear wrestling is completely illegal.

#11 In Fairbanks, Alaska it is illegal to give alcoholic beverages to a moose.

#12 In Lake Elmo, Minnesota it is illegal to sell pumpkins or Christmas trees that are grown outside city limits.

#13 There is a federal law that makes it illegal to be “annoying” on the Internet.

#14 If you register with a false name on MySpace or Facebook you could potentially “spend five years in federal prison“.

#15 In Hazelwood, Missouri it is illegal for little girls to sell girl scout cookies in the front yards of their own homes.

#16 All over the United States lemonade stands run by children are being shut down because they do not have the proper permits.

#17 In Florida, it is illegal to bring a plastic butter knife to school.

#18 In San Juan Capistrano, California it is illegal to hold a home Bible study without a “conditional use permit“.

#19 In the city of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania it is illegal to make even a single dollar from a blog unless you buy a $300 business license.
 

Norm Stansfield

私は亀が好きだ。
Mar 17, 2009
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#2
I kinda see their point on Nr. 11 though. A drunk moose is going to be a problem.
 

jules

uppity taxpayer
Jul 24, 2005
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#3
great post, but shit like this makes me nuts because it just upholds my thoughts that we are doomed.

and yeah u dont want a drunk moose running amuck
 

Mags

LDAR, bitch.
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Oct 22, 2004
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#4
Stupid list. Why stop at 19?

I'm sure you could find hundreds of these "reasons".
 

MayrMeninoCrash

Liberal Psycopath
Dec 9, 2004
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#5
#20 - Republicans want to force doctors to shove needless foreign objects in a woman's vagina against her will before receiving a medical procedure.
 

Creasy Bear

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#6
#8 In the United States it is illegal to sell natural cures for cancer – even if they work.
Actually, it's more a matter of... It's illegal to sell natural cures for cancer- until you prove they work.

Is anybody really going to argue for the rights of quacks and scammers to sell unproven cancer-curing snake oil?

If you think you have the cure for cancer, then go through the proper scientific channels, and get your shit approved by the FDA. Don't sit there whining that the Medical Industrial Complex is taking away your constitutional right to immediately peddle your Eye of Newt cancer cure on SiriusXM.
 

Warfarer

I can't think of anything funny.
Jun 20, 2005
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#7
In all fairness, I have always driven over to Georgia to wrestle bears because they are easier to find there. The one that pisses me off is that I am not allowed to whale fish from the back of my truck in Alabama. Pisses me off to no end.
 

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
Apr 22, 2002
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#8
#4 In many U.S. states is it now illegal to collect rain that falls from the sky on to your own property.

And, though I didn't go to the article, I'm willing to bet that these are states with a large mosquito problem. Standing water/pools are a public health hazard.
 
Dec 8, 2004
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Maine
#9
In America today it is illegal to milk your cow and sell the milk to your neighbor. If you do this, there is a good chance that federal agents will raid your home at the crack of dawn. - Yep the FDA in their black stealth helicopters will fast rope into your property. Unless (depending on what state) you allow a state inspector to have a look at your sanitary practices to make sure you don't accidentally kill or sicken someone.
 
Dec 8, 2004
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Maine
#10
Actually, it's more a matter of... It's illegal to sell natural cures for cancer- until you prove they work.

Is anybody really going to argue for the rights of quacks and scammers to sell unproven cancer-curing snake oil?

If you think you have the cure for cancer, then go through the proper scientific channels, and get your shit approved by the FDA. Don't sit there whining that the Medical Industrial Complex is taking away your constitutional right to immediately peddle your Eye of Newt cancer cure on SiriusXM.
Or cock pills... example Enzyte... the FDA closed him down... and since the warehouse where all these cock pills was kept didn't keep their rent paid the warehouse owner started selling them.
 

Creasy Bear

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#11
#13 There is a federal law that makes it illegal to be “annoying” on the Internet.
The fact that Kirk hasn't been apprehended and prosecuted is living proof that this one isn't strictly enforced.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
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#12
Isn't this more like a Wacky Laws article than a Mommy Nation article? And what's with the commentary on 5 and 3?
 

Party Rooster

Unleash The Beast
Apr 27, 2005
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#13
In America today it is illegal to milk your cow and sell the milk to your neighbor. If you do this, there is a good chance that federal agents will raid your home at the crack of dawn.
And by "good chance," they must mean the handful of times it's happened in recent years.
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
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#14
Home owners associations sums up the control freaks
 
Dec 8, 2004
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#15
And by "good chance," they must mean the handful of times it's happened in recent years.
http://www.infowars.com/raw-food-raid-armed-agents-bust-raw-milk-cheese-sellers/...

Like how there is a picture of a SWAT team on the page... even though what really happened was some Sheriff Deputies went with some FDA Investigators who picked up the milk and loaded into their urban assault vehicle (I think it was a Chevy Minivan).

There might have been some OCI agents there (the FDA with guns) but more then likely there were some Federal Marshals there.
 

whiskeyguy

PR representative for Drunk Whiskeyguy.
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#16
In Chico, California it is illegal to detonate a nuclear device within the city limits.
 

Creasy Bear

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#17
#5 In America today it is illegal to milk your cow and sell the milk to your neighbor. If you do this, there is a good chance that federal agents will raid your home at the crack of dawn.
And by "America" they mean other than the 32 states were selling raw milk is legal. And by "illegal" they mean selling unispected raw milk without a proper license. And by "neighbor" they mean all the customers of a commercial raw milk business. And by "good chance" they mean a very small chance given the very few times it has actually happened. And by "federal agents" they mean local Sheriff deputies, and a goober from the FDA. And by "crack of dawn" they mean whatever time of day the agents happen to show up.

Hyperbolespeak that would make Alex Jones proud.
 

Creasy Bear

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#18
In Indianapolis, IN it's illegal to walk down the street with an obvious boner.
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
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#20
#20 - Republicans want to force doctors to shove needless foreign objects in a woman's vagina against her will before receiving a medical procedure.
Don't drag politics into this. EVERYONE wants to shove needless foreign objects into a woman's vagina. It's called "Fun" and/or "Teaching a bitch who's the boss."
 

MagicBob

Registered User
Dec 2, 2010
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#21
#10 In the state of Alabama, bear wrestling is completely illegal.
SteveC Voice : "booooooooooooooooo"
 

KRSOne

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#23
I like how tyranny is reduced to 'control freak'.
 

KRSOne

Registered User
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#25
I like how theoretical crimes that have never been enforced are elevated to 'tyranny'.
Those laws are in place for selective enforcement. If someone doesn't like your politics they can come to your house and find 100 different BS laws to throw you in jail or give you thousands, maybe millions in fines. Its like the lady that taped the cops from her yard, cops arrested her, they had to let her go, and the next day a dozen cops were in the neighborhood giving tickets to people for parking 13 inches from the curb instead of 12.

Stossel did a great show about this on his FOX business show called "Too Many Laws".