Any of you alcoholics like to pee?


I want to have L'il Jimmy's babies

Many of us, no doubt, have found ourselves kneeling down before the porcelain god reflecting on the events that brought us there. Usually, these moments result in some sort of vow that our lives will be different if we can just get through the unfortunate experience at hand. For many, however, kneeling is not an option. Often this has nothing to do with irreverence, it is simply a practical concern for the balance and agility needed to navigate our way down to the floor in a highly altered state. For these people I recommend doing your holiday imbibing at public establishments equipped with U.S. patent 6,681,419, a forehead rest strategically installed against "a wall above a bathroom commode or urinal or beneath a showerhead ." Thanks to this handy little device you can steady yourself by simply resting your forehead in the appropriately bowing down your head position required of your shameful state.

Naturally, none of this will help when you finally have to peel yourself away from the wall and make your way out of the bathroom and back to your friends. Hopefully, however, the porcelain god will have smiled favorably on you so that you'll know, as your designated driver is wrestling your car keys away from you, that tomorrow is the start of a brand new day and a whole new you!


Wackbagger, Geek, Administrator
Wackbag Staff
wow.... :icon_conf
someone went to school...

just to invent this.

god bless America.


**I move away from the mic to fuck your mother.
That thing would be all grimey from people's nasty sweat and forehead grease. Yuck.

Chino Kapone

Yo, whats wrong wit da beer we got?
I actually have cabinets above my pisser that i use like this. I just balance my head on the cabinet and piss at the perfect angle. Really helps after a long night of Corona's. :D


I'll brace myself with a hand against the wall if need be.

Chino Kapone

Yo, whats wrong wit da beer we got?
I'll brace myself with a hand against the wall if need be.

Sometimes ya just have to use two hands.:D Either that or ya gotta piss and talk on the phone at the same time.