Bagels Are Such a Shitty Non-Treat

Neckbeard

I'm Team Piggy!
Donator
#1
I hate going to meetings with bagels out. Fucking savages. Put cookies or donuts out. You order 200 fucking bagels and 5 people eat 'em and the rest go in the trash.
 

Hudson

Supreme Champion!!!!!
Donator
#3
Only two places I have ever been that make good Bagels. ABC Bagel in New Brunswick N.J. and Bagel International in Bradley Beach N.J.
 

fletcher

Darkness always says hello.
Donator
#4
Id rather have a delicious bagel with a shmear of veggie cream cheese than a shitty cookie or a doughnut.
 

Mags

LDAR, bitch.
Donator
#5
Id rather have a delicious bagel with a shmear of veggie cream cheese than a shitty cookie or a doughnut.
A toasted Everything bagel with lox, cream cheese (shmear), red onions, etc is a true treat.

Cookies and donuts are for children and fatties.
 

Neckbeard

I'm Team Piggy!
Donator
#6
You yentas. That isn't what you get at these meetings and seminars and orientations. You get dry, flavorless bullshit that somehow magically has 300 or 400 calories.
How the fuck? You'd get all the flavor and joy if you just ripped up a hunk of the conference room carpeting and started munching but somehow one bagel is nearly a breakfast!
 

LiddyRules

I Think I'll Eat An Apple
#7
You are aware that you're supposed to put stuff on the bagel, right? And yes, there are shitty/bland bagels out there (and you're probably getting that if it's part of a spread), but if you seek out good bagels, it's far better than a donut or cookie for breakfast. And if it is part of a spread, you're not getting good donuts or cookies either. And who wants a cookie for breakfast?
 

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
#8
Only two places I have ever been that make good Bagels. ABC Bagel in New Brunswick N.J. and Bagel International in Bradley Beach N.J.
In the Seattle area, it's Einstein's bagels. Give me a toasted pretzel bagel with veggie smear please. Oh, and a cup of that lovely vanilla Hazelnut coffee that no one else in the world seems to do right.

I've also heard good things about Blazing Bagels, but I've never had.
 

Mags

LDAR, bitch.
Donator
#9
You yentas. That isn't what you get at these meetings and seminars and orientations. You get dry, flavorless bullshit that somehow magically has 300 or 400 calories.
How the fuck? You'd get all the flavor and joy if you just ripped up a hunk of the conference room carpeting and started munching but somehow one bagel is nearly a breakfast!
Quality whole wheat bagel, with 2 eggs, bacon and tomato. Num nums.
 

whiskeyguy

PR representative for Drunk Whiskeyguy.
Donator
#12
I was never really into bagels because the only time I tried them was in a lobby of some hotel. However, we have a really popular bagel shop back home and holy shit are those delicious. Now I'll often get on the internet and try to find a good bagel place while I'm traveling. I think I'm going to hunt down one here in an hour or so.

I haven't had a donut in years. They're delicious (especially those old fashion chocolate ones), but if I eat them I'll feel like shit for the rest of the day.
 

Mags

LDAR, bitch.
Donator
#13
New York has the bessssst bagels. It's the water (and the Jews).
 

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
#14
I was never really into bagels because the only time I tried them was in a lobby of some hotel. However, we have a really popular bagel shop back home and holy shit are those delicious. Now I'll often get on the internet and try to find a good bagel place while I'm traveling. I think I'm going to hunt down one here in an hour or so.

I haven't had a donut in years. They're delicious (especially those old fashion chocolate ones), but if I eat them I'll feel like shit for the rest of the day.
That's why you have them for dessert. :)
 

Guilty Spark

It's freeing and refreshing
#19
A NY fuckin salt bagel with some whitefish, it doesn't get any better or jewier.

Fuck shitty donuts in their holes.
 

Mommadeez4u

Bastard coated bastard w/ bastard filling
#21
Fuck the 'Everything Bagel', fucking cunt bagel infecting all the other bagels in the bag with its fucking garlic and onion awfulness

 

crippledalbino

The God of 42nd Street
Donator
#23
Fuck the 'Everything Bagel', fucking cunt bagel infecting all the other bagels in the bag with its fucking garlic and onion awfulness

The everything bagel is so sublime.
Poppies, sesame seeds, garlic, onion... all it's missing is the tears of its detractors.
 

whiskeyguy

PR representative for Drunk Whiskeyguy.
Donator
#24
Fuck the 'Everything Bagel', fucking cunt bagel infecting all the other bagels in the bag with its fucking garlic and onion awfulness

People eat food without garlic or onions on it?
 

Neckbeard

I'm Team Piggy!
Donator
#25
Bagels are not a stand alone treat!

Damn them!
 
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