Clerks III

Saikotic

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#1
Sigh. I used to be a HUGE Kevin Smith mark. I've been to a couple of his "Evening With" sessions and he's a really entertaining dude, but I don't know if this can be good.... I guess we'll see.

THE BEGINNING OF THE END
20 years ago today, we started shooting CLERKS.
20 years later, with no plan or provocation, I jumped out of bed at 4:20 this morning and started writing CLERKS III.
It's been like hanging out with old friends.
And after 2 hours of tapping the keys and giggling, I have come to a conclusion...
CLERKS III will be the best film I'll ever make.
 

fletcher

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#2
It could be good until he wakes up tomorrow, stoned as usual, and decides this time its going to be a musical.
 

LiddyRules

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#3
Isn't he going to write it as a book first, release it chapter by chapter, and let the audience recommend where the story should go?

That isn't a joke. Last I heard that was his plan.

20 years later, with no plan or provocation, I jumped out of bed at 4:20 this morning and started writing CLERKS III.
Ugh. He really is marijuana's worst representative.

That being said. If he puts Leonardo Leonardo in it, I will up it at least half a grade. And I don't care if it's Alec Baldwin himself or a cartoon in a real world environment.
 

ShooterMcGavin

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#4
It could be good until he wakes up tomorrow, stoned as usual, and decides this time its going to be a musical.
This.

As much as I like being trendy, I really don't understand why people think his movies are AMMMAAAZZZINNNG. Clerks was decent. Clerks II was meh.
 

Saikotic

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#5
I loved Clerks. Mallrats was ok when it hit and I loved Chasing Amy. From there it was all meh.
 

fletcher

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#7
Isn't he going to write it as a book first, release it chapter by chapter, and let the audience recommend where the story should go?

That isn't a joke. Last I heard that was his plan.

Ugh. He really is marijuana's worst representative.

That being said. If he puts Leonardo Leonardo in it, I will up it at least half a grade. And I don't care if it's Alec Baldwin himself or a cartoon in a real world environment.
I was honestly surprised that Charles Barkley wasnt playing himself at some point in Clerks 2.
 

LiddyRules

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#8
You didn't like Jersey Girl?
I actually liked all of Smith's first five films. I thought Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was a cute love letter to the fans. But Jersey Girl was when he lost me. Primarily because he was touting it as his first adult movie. Chasing Amy was an adult movie. Jersey Girl was a shitty romantic comedy that had a masturbation discussion. Though there was one part of Jersey Girl I remember, and it was when Ben Affleck is running to catch his daughter's play, he throws off his blazer for absolutely no reason.

I was honestly surprised that Charles Barkley wasnt playing himself at some point in Clerks 2.
I can't explain it, but I love Clerks: The Animated Series and hate Clerks 2.
 

Saikotic

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You didn't like Jersey Girl?
Even at the time I was a pretty big Mark for Smith but I couldn't like that film. I liked Dogma when it hit, but it doesn't hold up. Nor does Strike Back.
 

fletcher

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#10
I can't explain it, but I love Clerks: The Animated Series and hate Clerks 2.
No need to explain, Lidderick, the show was massively underrated and deserved at least a second season.
 

Frankie_b

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#12
isnt there already a thread on this bullshit, one of the actors said hes not doing it?
 

icculus1284

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#13
isnt there already a thread on this bullshit, one of the actors said hes not doing it?
Thought that Randall said he's not doing it, and Smith said if one of the core group was out, he wouldn't film it.

Also, I hope Jason Mewes does something about his awful fake teeth. They were fine in Zack and Miri, now they're like deforming his face or something.
 

LiddyRules

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No need to explain, Lidderick, the show was massively underrated and deserved at least a second season.
Second season? At least a half season at least.

isnt there already a thread on this bullshit, one of the actors said hes not doing it?
Yeah, but Smith got high and spent 2 hours typing

Clerks III by Kevin Smith
First Draft
March 8, 2013
View Askew Productions

So there ain't no stopping him now.
 

fletcher

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#15
Second season? At least a half season at least.
Well iirc the episodes were already done when they gave the show the axe, at least the dvd exists so we could have seen the rest of the episodes. You know what I mean.
 

LiddyRules

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#16
Well iirc the episodes were already done when they gave the show the axe, at least the dvd exists so we could have seen the rest of the episodes. You know what I mean.
I know what you mean.
 

Saikotic

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#17
Also, I hope Jason Mewes does something about his awful fake teeth. They were fine in Zack and Miri, now they're like deforming his face or something.
You should hear him on Comic Book Men. He makes Mr Spock sound more intelligible by comparison. It's just sad.

EDIT: Huh, must still be somewhat a mark. I didn't realize that. I started watching since it was on after The Walking Dead and now I still watch. It's all scripted fluff, but I still watch it.
 

icculus1284

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#18
You should hear him on Comic Book Men. He makes Mr Spock sound more intelligible by comparison. It's just sad.
I've seen him on the show. I think I really noticed it last season. It's bad. I really like the guy too, just hope he can get that shit fixed.
 

Neckbeard

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#19
Clerks 3 sounds like Stoner Comedy Die Hard 4 or 5 or 6 or whatever the fuck number they are on now.

Nobody will really wanna do it but they'll get talked into doing it for the right amount of money and then be visibly and risibly miserable for the whole film.

It'll be comedic in the sense of watching people for 2 hours doing something they don't want to do for 2 hours is funny. WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THIS!?
 

DiggerNick

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#20
So Smith is a 'wake and bake' guy now?

Even his podcasts have become a chore to listen to. He used to have the quickest wit when he was chatting with Mosier, now he cries at the drop of a hat, has that awful dumb-ass chuckle that all pot-heads have and his humour is almost solely dick-sucking jokes.

I liked Dogma when it hit, but it doesn't hold up.
DOGMA is a brilliant script that was poorly executed. Even Smith admits he wanted Robert Rodriguez to direct it because he has no visual skill.

And some of the casting was terrible. There's a brief cameo by Janeane Garofalo that proved she should have been the lead instead of Linda Fiorentino. And Chris Rock sucked. If Smith had replaced him with the guy who played Hooper X in CHASING AMY the movie would have been marginally better.
 

fletcher

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#21
DOGMA is a brilliant script that was poorly executed. Even Smith admits he wanted Robert Rodriguez to direct it because he has no visual skill.

And some of the casting was terrible. There's a brief cameo by Janeane Garofalo that proved she should have been the lead instead of Linda Fiorentino. And Chris Rock sucked. If Smith had replaced him with the guy who played Hooper X in CHASING AMY the movie would have been marginally better.
Smith has always had a knack for fucking up casting. Fiorentino, TS Quinn, his wife. I dont get some of his decisions.
 

Neckbeard

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#22
Linda was reportedly a twat to work with and I've never heard that about Janeane, regardless of what you think about the comedy.

Now that you mention it, yeah. She'd have been a much stronger lead in Dogma.
I've never really noticed that.
 

Saikotic

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#23
I think Smith and Fiorentino had a major falling out during that flick. I agree about the cat who played Hooper X, but Alan Rickman was great. Lee was barely in in and the whole hockey/hellions angle was lame.
 

Saikotic

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#24
Smith has always had a knack for fucking up casting. Fiorentino, TS Quinn, his wife. I dont get some of his decisions.
Yeah but he discovered Jason Lee, right? Dude's got natural comedic timing.
 

DiggerNick

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#25
Smith has always had a knack for fucking up casting. Fiorentino, TS Quinn, his wife. I dont get some of his decisions.
I think Smith is like David Mamet (go with me on this one...) in that there are certain actors who can just nail his dialogue where other actors flounder.

For example, Jason Lee was born to speak Kevin Smith's lines. Fiorentino, Chris Rock and Jeremy London struggled with it.