cruises? who's done it

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
42,614
9,648
848
#1
i know that mien fuhrer, seems to greatly enjoy cruising the high seas but quite frankly im not quite in the same tax bracket as him. from a good bit of the researching that ive done it looks to me like there not as "inclusive" as they try to make themselves out to be. im a bit of a drinker and it seems to me that drinks are not available for a package deal + they slam you an additional 10$ per day for "general gratuity" and 15% for your drinks food ect and you cant take any thing on the ship with you... what the fuck is this bullshit, if im paying for an "all inclusive" trip i want the option of truly "all inclusive" any one have any experience with this or am i just an idiot for thinking that this is a sale's scam and i do understand that gambling and purchases aren't covered.

oh and i figure that between me and the old lady were going to be good for at least 150$ a day in booze if we go "ala cart" i dont really want to go on a vacation but my mother is insisting on it and is covering most of the bill, but even then i think its a rip off, if im going to have to pay for drinks i mine as well load up my durango and just drive to denali
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
46,790
6,917
763
F.U.B.A.R
#2
Most ships have duty free shopping that includes booze. So instead of buying all your drinks at the bar (inflated price) buy the booze and mix it yourself.
 

Tax Kuntz

just being an ass
Jul 6, 2003
8,976
6
536
Parsippany, NJ
#3
I've been on lots of cruises, paying for drinks a la cart isn't really a problem. If you drink the fruity concoctions, they make them pretty strong...so you don't need that many. Lot's of 'happy hour" specials and such too.

Drinks are free in the casino too while your playing.

Most cruises issue you a sort of credit card/ID thing when you board, so everything goes on that until the end and you can choose how you want to pay for it.

Getting liquored up on a cruise isn't that hard. Just go and have fun.
 

Don the Radio Guy

G-Bb-A-D
Donator
Mar 30, 2006
69,623
5,081
568
Wyoming
#4
I don't drink much and my bar tab was over $1000 on the last cruise I went on. And I was by myself.

Not much remains of memories of that week, except two Norwegian chicks stalking me and meeting some girl from Chicago.
 

BaLZaC~308

ONE OF THE COOL KIDS
Sep 27, 2006
7,217
1
141
staten
#5
If I was you I would just lean towards all inclusive on some island for 5 - 7 days...



Me and AF will be drinking ourselves into a coma in a few months if we can both get away
 

distortion9

Satellite Of Hate
Dec 12, 2001
4,925
8
368
NY
#6
Just go..you will love it.

You WILL spend a lot of money on drinks but that's about it [ for me and my wife it was an easy grand for the week ]...they will force feed you all your food. a lot of food...all the time. Breakfast at 8:00 another meal at 8:12...more food at 9:00...9:18 a buffet...[Dice voice on] All day long [Dice voice off] it's fucking constant....I kid you not...you will be a giant, fat bastard in 3 days....a giant, fat, drunk bastard....it rules.....just go.

Check the stars at night...they are like nickels and dimes hanging in the sky....
 

mikeybot

SPANAKOPITA!!!
Jul 25, 2005
19,291
3,590
623
philly
#7
Cruises just sound like a nightmare to me. Stuck on in a place with hundreds of people I'd probably just want to throw overboard.
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
42,614
9,648
848
#8
Most ships have duty free shopping that includes booze. So instead of buying all your drinks at the bar (inflated price) buy the booze and mix it yourself.
no can do its strictly against the rules

im up in the air, i also really hate people. my mother is pressuring us (my wife and i) to go.
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
46,790
6,917
763
F.U.B.A.R
#9
no can do its strictly against the rules

im up in the air, i also really hate people. my mother is pressuring us (my wife and i) to go.
A lot has changed, I guess. If mother insists on going fashion her a rock coat and *KPLUNK* problem solved... ;)
 

LZMF1

Semi-Eviscerated
Jul 7, 2005
4,709
219
628
Morris Plains, NJ
#10
no can do its strictly against the rules

im up in the air, i also really hate people. my mother is pressuring us (my wife and i) to go.
after reading that post i can easily say that you will despise it. i've been on quite a few cruises and it's an OK experience to a certain degree but then you get all of the rude savages that are also on the cruise. why can't it be like it was back in "ye oldern days"? you know, like in the movie titanic where 1st class never sees or hears from the lower class passengers.
my last cruise was last december..... get one of the highest end staterooms on the ship for myself and the wife and kids and i have mingle, eat, and swim in the same area as these fucking animals who are in the bottom of the boat??? nuh-uh! not my priveledged, pampered, fancy ass!! we found a restaurant on the ship that the "commoners" simply couldn't afford. the wife and i ate there all but one day of the week long cruise.

there's sooooo much to do but you have to deal with others unless you're gonna hide in your stateroom.
 

blakesnake00

The name is Snake.
Jun 5, 2005
658
2
253
peoria Il
#11
Wow great timing,I am leaving tomorrow to go on a 7 day est. caribbean cruise on Princess C.L..This is our second cruise.We did one 6 yrs. ago on Carnival and I vowed never to do it again.The travel agent(my cousin) put us 2 adults,3 kids in a single room with no fuckin window,2 of us with the flu and my wife got 400 bucks stolen.Anyway after like 20 trips to all-inclusive Car. resorts were going to give it another try.This time my wife and I have the best suite you can get and my 3 kids ahve their own same suite.The rooms are small and the tipping shit does bug me ,but how often can you go to bed in Montego Bay,Jamaica and wake up in Mexico.I dont drink anymore so the all incl. resorts are just not good anymore.Anyway Im rambleing again sry.,Ill give you a full report when I get back If youwanna drop me a line im taking my laptop(free internet for suite people)so Ill check it daily.Have a great holiday all.
 

LZMF1

Semi-Eviscerated
Jul 7, 2005
4,709
219
628
Morris Plains, NJ
#12
blakesnake....the free internet for us fancy people(people with suites) sucks ass. leave it at home and enjoy yourself.
 
May 14, 2004
960
0
0
Bum Fuck WV
#13
Went on a cruise with my family so thank god they took care of the drinks. Apparently the food is free because the drink tab is just as expensive as the cruise is. When you ask for water they give you bottled water and charge you. I'm sure if you ask for tap they will give it to you or carry around a canteen.
 

wetandstickyjim

Drop dead retard!
May 25, 2005
5,927
20
553
Congers, NY
#14
I went on a cruise for my honeymoon 15 years ago. Royal Caribean. First stop we went to the town and bought booze and tonic and mixed our own drinks and also drank at the bars. It helped curb the cost. Now I hear they won't LET you do that? Fuck that shit. Pack some in your bags.

Otherwise go. They're great. Good food and lost to do. shit, I would love to go on a cruise to nowhere and be out in the ocean where you can't see anything except for the stars at night. It's really cool.

Oh, btw, your mom sounds like a pain in the ass, but take her money. :action-sm
 

Southtown

Registered User
Aug 10, 2004
1,213
249
658
#15
I've been on a Disney Cruise. My friend brought a suitcase full of beer, and I brought along a bottle of champagne because it was my wife and I's first cruise. We used the sinks with ice for coolers and the staff didnt give a shit. The room attendent actually re-iced the stuff for us.

If you are not a beer drinker I think it would be easy to get a couple bottles on board and just carry a flask or something so you wont have to run to your room alot.
Also I dont know how they could stop you from bringing booze on board you bought during at one of the stops.

The only thing that I didnt like about the cruise is you cant run a tab, you have to sign everytime they bring you a drink. Which I guess isnt that big of a deal, I understand why they do it, its just a bit annoying to me.
 

WhiteHonkyDevil

El hombre de los moleculos!
Dec 8, 2004
10,928
959
628
Detroit, MI
#16
When did they stop allowing all that?

I was on a cruise this time last year, and we stopped in Cozumel, filled a gallon water bottle with bacardi, and used it for the rest of the remaining days. Plus, the couple we were hanging out with sbrought 3 bottles of scotch on in wine bottles (Carnival allows you to bring up to 3 bottles of wine). Plus, we kept buying bottles of rum on the ship's duty-free (which actually was cheaper than prices I've seen around my house).

Beats the shit out of my first cruise. Me and my friend went through $1100 in booze on a 3 day cruise. Never again.
 

Chino Kapone

Yo, whats wrong wit da beer we got?
Jun 10, 2005
16,959
2,196
608
#17
Just fill shampoo bottles with alcohol, and walk around like you a pycho drinking Head & Shoulders. The savages wont fuck with you if you look like that crazy white guy their mama always told them about. :D
 
Jun 2, 2005
15,516
4
0
Dallas
#18
I've been on a few cruises, 4 I think... I was also in the Navy assigned to an aircraft carrier so the memories aren't as stand out as they are for some.

It's always been "against the rules" to bring your own liquor on the ships, but no one x-rays your bags or really gives a shit as long as you're not obvious about it. I seem to remember the food being part of the package, I don't remember any mandatory gratuity, but it's been quite a few years.

Usually, you have 3 "sit down" meals a day where you'll be forced to have lunch and dinner at an assigned table where they will have you seated with another couple or family. They tend to match you up really well with your dining companions (young couples get seated together, mid 30s with kids will get an 8-10 seat table for two families to sit together, etc). If you don't like people, the meals are the only time you'll really be forced to interact.

The booze is where they get you. Every time you order anything that's not part of the inclusive package it gets charged to your ID card. You should plan for about $200 a day -- seriously. Shit will add up quick. Every port you go to they're going to try to get you to go on excursions, snorkeling, bus tours, etc. If you like to drink, try to get on the booze cruises or catamaran trips, as the booze is usually all inclusive on those, and pretty free flowing. My ex wife and I went on a few cheap excursions, and even though at the time we were 20 the cruise line had a 21 year old rule so we weren't able to order drinks to build our tab, but at the end of the week it was still almost $800.

You'll have fun, but I do have to say that I doubt I'll go on another cruise. You get a much better deal from the all inclusive resorts.

Edit: Oh yeah, and all the employees are foreign savages, but they tend to be really cool guys who'll bend over backwards to do anything to make you give them money at the end of the cruise where they pass their hats around for tips. I've been approached by Jamaican and Hatian waiters trying to sell me weed and other party favors, etc.
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
31,547
2,205
898
Florida's Nature Coast
#19
It's on my list of things-to-do, as I've never been on one. But, I don't know if I'll ever get the chance.
 

ChrisH

Waddle Doodle
Jun 11, 2004
2,358
0
0
Brooklyn, NY
#20
Most ships have duty free shopping that includes booze. So instead of buying all your drinks at the bar (inflated price) buy the booze and mix it yourself.
True, but they don't let you have the booze until the last night of the cruise when you buy it duty free on board.
 
Jun 2, 2005
15,516
4
0
Dallas
#21
True, but they don't let you have the booze until the last night of the cruise when you buy it duty free on board.
Yeah, if you want to take advantage of duty free and have it for the cruise you gotta buy it at the little shop on the pier when you're heading back to the boat before you leave a port. Keep a back pack with you when you go ashore to stick bottles of booze in, etc. No one's going to search your bag.
 

ChrisH

Waddle Doodle
Jun 11, 2004
2,358
0
0
Brooklyn, NY
#22
Me and my chick have been on two cruises (both Norweigan Cruise Lines) and loved them. The NCL ships are "freestyle" so you only eat when/where/with whom you want, not at any set time or location.

Echoing what others have said, the booze is really where they get you. HOWEVER, you can smuggle a lot on board, which cuts the costs drastically. I've never tried putting it in luggage (I presume they would x-ray, but maybe not); rather, we used water bottles in our carry-ons filled with vodka/clear rum. First time, no checking, the second time, the port people made me open and sip it (to make sure it wasn't a dangerous liquid), had to know it was booze, but let me on with it anyway (port security was rent-a-cop, not cruise employee).

If you can sneak booze on board (I suggest also having a small water bottle to act as a "flask"), you can really save a lot of $$. Also, it is *definitely* worth it to buy the "all-the-soda-you-can-drink" sticker for your ID. It's about $40 or so, but if you're like me and drink a lot of anything carbonated (diet coke and seltzer, especially when hungover), it pays for itself.

Have a great trip!
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
42,614
9,648
848
#23
eh im just going to have to research it some more, i would prefer to just go fly fishing with the boy, i really hate other people with a passion and would rather just sit in the woods buy my self.
 

JimsInfectedEye

That's very hurtful, sir.
May 21, 2005
3,526
2
323
Philadelphia
#24
$1000/wk for booze? wtf do you people do, have an IV bag hooked up?

How much is alcohol on a cruise, anyway? Say, one bottle of Miller Lite?
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
42,614
9,648
848
#25
5$ at least for a bottle of that swill,
most mixed drinks start at 5.5+
the only one that posted drink prices was carnival i think, all the others hide that shit from you, and i think 1k for booze for me for a week at those prices would be normal. me and the old lady are good for at least 6o+$ bar bill on an average night out with those kinds of prices and nothing to do the next day, i also have a tendency to drink till i pass out then wake up and start all over again and if i have nothing to really do i can keep that cycle up for a few days.