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Discussion in 'Wackbag's Mean Cusine' started by BIV, Jul 1, 2013.
No bikini tinies?
Agree with all the frufru bitch drinks... but a classic Martini? What kind of shitheap dive is this guy going to that considers a vodka Martini too complicated and exotic?
Bars don't bother carrying dry vermouth? Yes... I'm sure biker bars and flophouse bars don't. Any bar that doesn't have a bottle of dry vermouth on hand is officially a dive.
True about the Old Fashioned... I make them at home as a rare treat... a well-prepared Manhattan is a wonderful thing. But I would never order one out at a regular bar. A high end bar... maybe.
Read it. it's about ruining the alcohol, not the other way around.
Beer and virgin drinks aren't cocktails and who
the fuck is bothered by making a vodka martini?
Kind of a lame article.
Vermouth isn't just a "masker'... it's just as valid a mixer as any other mixer. The point of all mixers used to be to cover the horrid taste of shitty booze. By this guy's logic... all mixers should have been done away with when booze got better. Nonsense.
Gin tastes a fuckload better now than the turpentine gin of the 1920's... so am I being stupid when I drink a gin and tonic nowadays?
Hah hah. Someone can't get laid at a bar.
I guess it is classier in the author's book to order a Yagerbomb than a dirty martini. Nevermind you order a classic drink like an Old Fashioned. What about mojitos? Isn't that also too much work for these poor bartenders?
Sounds like it was written by some lazy bartender that doesn't want to do his job.
Grew up with my family drinking Old Fashioneds, Grandad Old Fashioned's to be specific. Many a time I have heard my grandfather say to the cocktail waitress: "Grandad Old Fashioned...but not too much water because Old Grandad can't swim". It is a classic mixed drink, like a Dirty Martini,...If a bartender gets fits when asked to make one, they shouldn't own the moniker bartender.
Now Grasshopper, Lemondrop, or Oatmeal Cookie...those are queer drinks. And that picture is of a Whiskey Sour, another breakfast or queeb drink.
So I am guessing the hipster douche that wrote this just orders shots?
Only if it comes with a PBR. Not a sissy drink like lime beer. That the guys with muscles drink. The ones who the chicks go for. They're all meanies. I mean, he doesn't hate that sort of beer. Bartenders do. Because they're making sales?
I hope this guy gets killed by a drunk driver that is smashed on strawberry daiquiri's.
I don't really care what anyone orders at a bar, but girls that ask to see a drink menu at the bar itself should be killed. Get a fucking booth if you want to do that, there are serious drinkers waiting in line behind you.
Thankfully, I rarely drink at establishments classy enough to actually have a drink menu, but that seems to always happen whenever I'm on vacation in places like Tahoe or wherever.
The Old Fashioned one is preposterous. Maybe if you order one in Nebraska or Georgia you're kind of a twat, especially if you insist on proclaiming the "right way"
to make one, but they are popular in California and institutions in the Midwest. I'd love for this bartender to work in Minnesota or Wisconsin and try to make a living
without mixing highball Old Fashioneds. Half of the money you make in the Midwest is selling whiskey and brandy Old Fashioneds.
They are a great Barometer Cocktail. I've never had good service and good food from a bar that served me a shitty, half-assed Old Fashioned.
Edit: Sugar cube, bitters, rail whiskey, top it off with soda in a rocks glass. There is NOTHING ritzy about an Old Fashioned. The grimiest bars I've been in my life have made me Old Fashioneds.
P.S. DENVER COLORADO wants to give me alcohol advice? Fuck you, lady.
Sex on the Beach. Orgasm. Any drink with a sexual name is the mark of a douche.
And I do enjoy a good Manhattan or Old Fashioned, but only if it's at one of those restaurants that only have 4 or 5 drinks and that's the best one.
And you get a pass on frozen drinks if it's at a party where they are being blended. Ordering it off the menu is pretty douchey.
Nothing wrong with a fruity drink if you're in the tropics. Basically if a linen suit is ok, so is a fruity drink.
Only if Native booze is involved....
While anyplace can give you an Old Fashioned...I can name 4 places that I have had a truly great one: Rods in Florham Park, NJ. Publick House in Sturbridge, Mass. Bookbinders Philly, Pa. and Queen Mary in Long Beach Ca.
I love a good Old Fashion but I would never order one at a bar because I know they would not make it right. It's that little touch of raw egg white you shake the fuck out of till it emulsifies and gives you that foam on the top that makes it sublime. A lost art in the modern age.
Basically anything that you need Red Bull to mix it.
The writer of this article is a douchebag.