Fuck Comcast, Enough with your Bullshit

crippledalbino

The God of 42nd Street
Donator
Aug 16, 2006
40,617
11,960
628
The Oh-See, Fuck-Asses
#1
So I'm sitting here at the bar.
I mean, I'm sitting here at the Group W bar, and WHY, do you ask? Why am I here?

I'm here because Comcast sucks. I hate them, I hate them all.

A little history.

One lovely Saturday evening I'm sitting at home and just about to crash, trying to say good night to some friends, when all of a sudden, POW. Nothing is connecting. Now, of course I don't care, because like any single lad, I'm already drunk and therefore couldn't give much of a shit about whether or not my last 'good night' messages are making through, so I drunkenly grab my phone and finish texting the couple of people who I was talking to, shut it up, and go to sleep.
Ah, blessed, blessed sleep.
Now the fun begins.

The next morning I wake up and go stagger out into my luxurious front room in order to see what the problem is. The first few lights are on on my modem, but not the last few. Fine.
Call Comcast.
Not the brightest thing ever, but what the fuck am I supposed to do?

Well, so we go through the whole thing and it's the guy's opinion that my modem is shot. So I have two choices: Monday night he could have guys come to look at it, or I could buy a new modem. Fuck that, I want the internet TODAY so I went to Best Buy and dropped eighty bucks on a new one.
I know, I know, kids today just want everything right now. Well, motherfucker, I'm paying forty two bucks a month on cable TV and fifty something on channels that I never watch, it'd be nice to fucking enjoy them.

So I buy a new one, come home and install it, call them to register and...
....
...nothing.
No, they can't get through to my modem. It MUST be that I bought a faulty modem at Best Buy. The service call is still in effect, so fine.

The guy shows up.
Meanwhile, I've also discovered that my channels aren't coming in. Just some of them. The premium channels, so called and alleged. He tells me that the channels are a coincidence, he installs a new cable modem, and lo-and-behold, it works.
So I'm an idiot, right?
Clearly.

It lasts until Wednesday. On Wednesday I come home and find that once again, my cable is out. Another service call.
You keeping track at home? Good.

This time I stay home on Thursday because they're offering me 11-2 as a window.

So I get good and drunk that night, fall asleep, sleep in while listening to O&A, and the guys come by the house while Ron and Fez are discussing the N-Word and fuckin' Jane Fonda's use of the 'ol Cunt word. Loved it.
Loved. It.

So they go through everything, andthis time the problem is not my modem (as it never was, thanks for making me buy a new one, Comcast) nor is it anything to do with me, now it's some big box that's all coroded, some junction point has been frozen, then filled with some sort of... who knows. Honestly? Who the fuck knows any more?
Just that they said that they fixed it.

So I come home from work today.
Guess what?

Yeah. So now I've got my laptop at a bar that offers free Wi-Fi, eavesdropping at a table with five dudes who are all talking points and closing costs, and two chicks that are probably girlfriends of some of the dudes, that are just NOT interested in being here.
And eating wings.
And drinking beer.

So take lemons, make lemonade, right?

So while I may have a nice dinner tonight and internet at the local pub, I wholeheartedly say the following:

Fuck you,Comcast. Fuck you in your fucking ear. Fucking don't make me feel like an idiot, like it's MY fucking problem that I'm not getting things, that I was stupid to go buy my own modem, when it turns out it's a fucking building wide problem because the whole thing is wired so shittily. And furthermore, Fuck you for coming out for this problem once, and I'm fucking GLAD you have to fucking come by again, and I'm gonna keep fucking calling every single fucking day that there's a problem and getting every fucking tech out in the state to fix my goddamned problems. Fix it the first time or die gargling rectal cancer, you stupid cunts.

Fuck Comcast.
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
42,639
9,656
848
#3
i said fuck comcast years ago fios baby, till they fuck me then its satalite then buy that time who knows what will be lateist and greatist
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
31,551
2,208
898
Florida's Nature Coast
#4
IF my FIOS ever goes out, I can just use my aircard. If that doesn't work for some reason, I got plenty of places nearby with Wi-Fi.

It's not just Comcast though. Every fucking provider always blames YOUR equipment. At work, I deal with Cisco routers that interface with T1/frame connections from Verizon. Every time the fucking frame goes down, those cocksuckers say "check your equipment" and never want to do anything when the problem is at their end.

If I was just a Verizon FIOS internet customer, I'd hear the same shit. But, because I am a TV customer too they won't feed me that line of bullshit. With FIOS TV, you basically are required to use the router which they supply (unless you want to spend $100 on a NIM in order to use a router of your choosing). Therefore, they never blame it on the router because they have to replace it for free if you are a FIOS TV customer. Mine already has crapped out, and they replaced it the next day - only because I did all of the troubleshooting myself before I even called them. I proved that it was the router before even picking up the phone. But, people I know who just have FIOS internet without TV service get the old "your router is bad, go buy a new one and then call us back" line whenever they have a problem.

My father still has DSL and a while back it kept going down every day, and then eventually stayed down. They kept telling him it was his equipment. I got sick of hearing it, so I replaced both his router and his DSL modem. I used to have DSL and just installed my "old" equipment at his house. But, it was way better than his original Verizon modem and router. Once that was done, he still had the problem so he called Verizon and told them he went and bought all new equipment and it was still fucked up. They sent a guy out to check the line and he found the pair was bad out on a pole somewhere.

Afterwards, my old man pitched a bitch about the length of the outage and the fact that they made him go buy the "new" equipment (my old equipment). They gave him like 4 months of service for free.
 

DanaReevesLungs

I can keep rhythm with no metronome...
Donator
Jun 9, 2005
9,133
2,536
681
Louisiana
#5
I haven't dealt with a cable company for 6 years. Gonna stay that way too.
 

HummerTuesdays

Another girrrrl!!!
Apr 24, 2005
7,347
0
261
On the road to ruin
#7
Wish I could say that but Fios isn't available in my town yet.:mad4:
x2

I can't get my On Demand to work. I'm on my 3rd cable box, too. Fuck Comcast. I'd love to buy some movies on-demand, but they won't get their equipment working. fuck 'em. More money in my pocket.
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
31,551
2,208
898
Florida's Nature Coast
#8
Before we switched to Fios, our On-Demand was down 95% of the time. That was the main thing that bugged me. I couldn't watch a Sopranos episode the next day because I missed it on Sunday night due to work or something else.
 
#9
Wish I could say that but Fios isn't available in my town yet.:mad4:
FIOS isn't perfect, either. My town was one of the initial rollout cities (minus a few munfs), and it's not been perfect. I've had at least four visits from FIOS people since my initial install, one of which was wholly unnecessary and my fault, but even three visits from the FIOS peeps makes it unnervingly similar to still having Comcast cable.

Throw in occasional HD-reverting-to-SD problems (especially egregious during last weekend's Daytona 500, which was a source of major brain-ache for my fiancee's boy), and believe me, I'm not 100% satisfied with Verizon.
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
31,551
2,208
898
Florida's Nature Coast
#10
I have had only one total FIOS outage that I know of, and it was storm-related. I've had one equipment failure, and it was the original POS Actiontec brick-style router. Otherwise, my experience with FIOS has been perfect... internet since 9/05 and TV since 2/07.

I live in the 2nd township in the county to get FIOS. Verizon isn't perfect (read my post above), but they've done right by me in this regard. I couldn't be happier to be away from Comcast.
 
#11
I have had only one total FIOS outage that I know of, and it was storm-related. I've had one equipment failure, and it was the original POS Actiontec brick-style router. Otherwise, my experience with FIOS has been perfect... internet since 9/05 and TV since 2/07.
Well, if you add an ActionTec router failure, which didn't warrant a visit from a Verizon van (just the UPS truck), I've had a total of FIVE problems (again, one was my fault). I had five days with no wireless and three days with no hard-wired internet from the router dying, which of course started crapping out less than 48hrs after the warranty expired. <---No joke
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
31,551
2,208
898
Florida's Nature Coast
#12
I take it you don't have TV service...

If you do, you get a replacement Actiontec no matter what because it's considered essential to the TV service.

One thing that does suck in terms of new installs, unless you can convince the installer to do otherwise, is that they run coax between the ONT and the router instead of CAT5. When my router died, I just plugged my main PC into the ethernet jack coming from the router. That way I at least had something... People with new installs don't have this option. Of course, you could run your own CAT5 after the fact and call the FSC to have them enable the RJ45 jack on the ONT...
 
#14
I do have the TV service, which means that I didn't pay for the new router... But that doesn't mean that the router didn't die within HOURS of the warranty expiring (at first they were going to charge me for a new one, but then they realized that they "had" to give me a new one for free).

We were without ANY internet access for three days while waiting for the new router to arrive... This after a few days with no wireless, which at first was undiagnosed as I was out of town and my gal figured that the laptop was the problem, not the router. Actually I, too, presumed that the laptop was the problem when I got home because her laptop WAS fucked up... Mine worked fine for two days, then the hard-wired dex-top stopped working, too.
 

WonkaVision

To my Friends!!! To My Friends!!!
Sep 5, 2005
3,059
1
236
HOUSTON
#16
Ugh, I am getting Comcast installed in my new place next month...only service offered in the area...besides Satellite.

Will be better than my current provider, TV Max...yuck
 
Dec 8, 2004
49,316
21,219
693
Maine
#18
Yep they tried "your modem is defective thing" and wanted me to drive to Bath ME (2 1/2 hour round trip)... to exchange it... good thing I went around and tightened all the connections and the modem worked... go figure... meh.