Fuck too much sharing on Facebook.

VMS

Victim of high standards and low personal skills.
#1
Posted today by a really hot girl I knew in college:

"Stomach bug. Ugh."

Seriously, honey, I used to spend hours in marching band following you around while you wore short shorts. I know that ass quite well, thank you. Might even have enjoyed it fully on a few drunken bowl trips, but we're not going to talk about that since you're now married to the guy you were technically dating at the time.

Do I really need to know, even through the veil of euphemism, that the deliciously perfect butt that I can still visualize is now squirting liquid yellow-brown shit while you're on the toilet?
 

Yesterdays Hero

She's better than you, Smirkalicious.
#7
Beat me to it you cunt.

Fucking facebook. I have 5 people on my friends list. One I live with. Had an ex on my friends list a couple years back that was constantly doing shit on there that was sent to everyone. Didn't last long. Narcissistic slit.
 

gleet

What's black and white and red all over?
#8
I don't do the facebook.

And yet, I survive somehow.
 

LiddyRules

The 9/11 Moon Landings Were An Outside Job
#9
What I don't get is, if you've already seen her drunken trips to the bowl, why does the poop bother you now?
 

VMS

Victim of high standards and low personal skills.
#15
ha you were in the band
I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it before.

The MVs (Marching Virginians) were ok. Not too many people took it seriously, it was an automatic 1 credit "A", we got great seats at the games (before the MVs were moved to the end zone), and we got paid to go on the bowl trips.

That, and back then the director couldn't come down on us too hard, or we'd all quit. So we'd be drinking during rehearsals on a pretty regular basis.

But yeah, it's college marching band. It sucked to be in the largest co-ed organization at Virginia Tech, with a favorable male:female ratio, and spending lots of time on the road, in strange hotel rooms...

Sent from my fucking phone, so I'm going to misspell shit.
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
#21
I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it before.

The MVs (Marching Virginians) were ok. Not too many people took it seriously, it was an automatic 1 credit "A", we got great seats at the games (before the MVs were moved to the end zone), and we got paid to go on the bowl trips.

That, and back then the director couldn't come down on us too hard, or we'd all quit. So we'd be drinking during rehearsals on a pretty regular basis.

But yeah, it's college marching band. It sucked to be in the largest co-ed organization at Virginia Tech, with a favorable male:female ratio, and spending lots of time on the road, in strange hotel rooms...

Sent from my fucking phone, so I'm going to misspell shit.
did you play skin flute along with rusty trombone?
 
#22
My high school friend posted a photo of his deceased infant grandchild in her coffin at the wake.

THAT is sharing too much.
 
#23
I was in the band and I got massive amounts of tail because of it. Make fun of me all you want, the massive quantity of pussy will sooth my heart ache.
 
#25
I'd rather read about a hot girl's intestinal problems than another "I'm grateful for" post. Seriously, the amount of narcissistic gratitude expressed on Facebook is really annoying.

"Wonderful, you're a good person for caring. How many pats on the head do you need?"
 
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