Fuck you Reese Witherspewn!

Psychopath

I want to fuck your girlfriend.
Dec 28, 2008
19,141
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Constant sate of misery
#1
Please, Please, Please. Let a video surface of the arrest.
http://bigstory.ap.org/article/reese-witherspoon-charged-disorderly-conduct

ATLANTA (AP) — Police in Georgia say that actress Reese Witherspoon has been arrested on a disorderly conduct charge after a traffic stop involving her husband in Atlanta.
A Georgia State Police incident report says that Witherspoon was arrested early Friday and charged with disorderly conduct.
The report says a state trooper observed that a car driven by Witherspoon's husband, James Toth, was failing to stay in its lane. The officer writes that Witherspoon disobeyed multiple orders to stay in the car while he performed a field sobriety test on Toth. After she refused to return the car, she was handcuffed and arrested.
The officer says that Witherspoon asked him "Do you know who I am?"
Toth was charged with driving under the influence.
A message left seeking comment wasn't immediately returned by Witherspoon's publicist, Meredith O'Sullivan Wasson.
 

Konstantin K

Big League Poster
Aug 25, 2010
15,776
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#2
She's lucky nobody got a nasty cut from that chin of hers. Could've been an assault charge.

The officer says that Witherspoon asked him "Do you know who I am?"
That makes me laugh every time.
 

Ego

The Only Thing Bigger Than My Head
Feb 15, 2005
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#3
Smoking Gun? TMZ?

No wonder my fellow Delawarean left her. Bitch on wheels!!
 

NuttyJim

Registered User
Feb 18, 2006
14,114
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#7
I wish I got paid for everytime someone said to me "Dont you know who I am?"
 

Begbie

Wackbag Generalissimo
Jul 21, 2003
18,047
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#8
I haaaate that whenever I listen to Johnny Cash now...I think of her and that cooont Joaquin Phoenix. Fuck'em all.
 

Hog's Big Ben

Getting ass-***** in The Octagon, brother.
Donator
Jul 28, 2005
28,236
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#11
Why do you hate Jay Leno so?
1) Because he's a milquetoast comedian that Jimmy worships because he can make "edgy" PG-13 jokes on The Tonight Show.

2) Because he's never said anything funny in his entire life.

3) Because he looks like Reese Witherspoon.

4) Because he's not confident enough in his own joke telling to stop mumbling through the laughter.
 

gleet

What's black and white and red all over?
Jul 24, 2005
22,541
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Idaho
#13
1) Because he's a milquetoast comedian that Jimmy worships because he can make "edgy" PG-13 jokes on The Tonight Show.

2) Because he's never said anything funny in his entire life.

3) Because he looks like Reese Witherspoon.

4) Because he's not confident enough in his own joke telling to stop mumbling through the laughter.
5) Because he had black hair and a white spot, then it turned to white hair with a black spot.
 

Neckbeard

I'm Team Piggy!
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Oct 26, 2011
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#14
6) Kevin Eubanks is as funny as a terminal illness
 

Hudson

Supreme Champion!!!!!
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Jan 14, 2002
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#15
I love when asshole celebrity's get brought down to size. It's one of my favorite things.
How can you hate someone who made this classic buddy cop movie:
And all I can think of is Reese Witherspoon in Election:
 

VicVinegar

Registered User
Oct 5, 2012
1,578
636
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#16
No surprise she reacts that way.

As usual though, my question is this: Why are you driving yourself rich people? Poor people can't afford car service, so they get DUIs.

Heck just abandon the car. You can afford the tow. Send a minion to get it the next day. Actors, athletes, all of them. Don't get it.
 

jnoble

Lingering longer for a longering linger
Dec 4, 2005
9,089
4,557
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New Jersey
#18
all I hear is Ant saying witherspwwoooonn
thats the first thing I thought about when I saw this thread lol

I'm a little surprised, I've read over the years that she was actually pretty down to earth for a celeb. Guess not.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
143,001
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#19
7) Headlines. This newspaper had a TYPO!!!! LOLOLOLOL!
 

Lord Zero

Viciously Silly
Aug 25, 2008
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Atlanta, GA
#20
The officer says that Witherspoon asked him "Do you know who I am?"
"I'm Reese Witherspoon! I made my first films when you were goin' out with cheerleaders!"
 

Neckbeard

I'm Team Piggy!
Donator
Oct 26, 2011
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#21
It doesn't really seem appropriate for somebody like Reese Witherspoon to be screaming "Do you know who I am?!"

Someone could easily answer that he didn't.
 

gleet

What's black and white and red all over?
Jul 24, 2005
22,541
13,853
608
Idaho
#22
It doesn't really seem appropriate for somebody like Reese Witherspoon to be screaming "Do you know who I am?!"

Someone could easily answer that he didn't.
"Uh, are you Amy Schumer?"
 

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
Apr 22, 2002
79,193
27,686
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Seattle
#24
I haaaate that whenever I listen to Johnny Cash now...I think of her and that cooont Joaquin Phoenix. Fuck'em all.
Don't worry about it. Johnny Cash pretty much sucked to begin with.
 
Dec 8, 2004
49,423
21,266
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Maine
#25
I wish I got paid for everytime someone said to me "Dont you know who I am?"
Or do you know who my father/uncle etc is...

Back in the day my chick had a traffic warrant... and she got pulled over by M. D. C. in Bawferston... she tried "do you know who my grandfather is"... he was commissioner of the M. D. C.. Guess she said it too late as they took her to the station anyway.