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Here's a nice story for all you Republicans.......

Discussion in 'Off Topic Discussion' started by CostaTheCrazyGreek, Jul 7, 2011.

  1. CostaTheCrazyGreek

    CostaTheCrazyGreek Registered User

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    The Story of Billy the Conservative

    Billy was your ordinary Republican who graduated from High School and went to college, where he became active in the local Republican club. There he informed other students of the correct way of thinking regarding politics, and he became incensed against the evil ways of the Democrats.
    One day, Billy led a demonstration against the town’s local food-stamp distribution center. Walking through the front door railing against government handouts he ran into his own mother!! His mother, the 400 pound beauty who had raised him as a proud Republican all his days, was collecting food-stamps!!! He railed against her, “All these years I thought you believed in the virtues of hard work and the American way! Why have you betrayed your country? Why couldn’t you put your faith in the rich bankers, the Wall Street fat cats, the CEOs, and the Republican Party?” Heartbroken, Billy want out of the place, never to talk to his mother again……

    After graduation, Billy, despite his trust in the rich bankers, the Wall Street fat cats, the CEOs, and the rich to create a job that would allow him to pursue the American dream, Billy failed to find a job. Starving, he swallowed his pride and went to the food-stamp distribution center, where he ran into his mother. His mother saw him, and he saw his mother, and they both cried and hugged each other, thanking God, Jesus Christ, and House Speaker Boehner that they had reunited again. His mother said, “Let’s go home…”

    On the ride to their trailer, the 400 hundred pound mother turned on the radio, and there was Rush Limbaugh speaking. Mother looked at son, and son looked at Mother. Arriving at the trailer, they turned Rush on in the trailer, and the mood was set. Rush’s voice oozed out of the radio, a voice that turns on all conservatives on. Many times had Billy sat alone listening to Rush, feeling the need to masturbate to Rush’s wisdom, and so, with the mood set, Billy’s 400 pound mother began to dance and strip in a sexy way to the timing of smooth Rush’s poetic voice. Unable to restrain himself, Billy leaped at his mommy, pushing away the rolls of fat to find the hairy vagina that had given him birth, so that he may be able to put a piece of his flesh in the spot from which he had come out the day he was born; and so they made love as only Republicans can do in that small trailer.
    Afterwards, they walked out of the trailer, and looked up at the American flag. It was a windless day, but the flag fluttered on the streams of patriotism that was radiating from mother and son.
    All of a sudden, his mother had a heart attack, and he was forced to bring her to the hospital. Though he was afraid, he was glad that the Republicans had repealed Obama-care, and that the market would make things right. Going up to the doctor, Billy asked what was to be done to his beloved mother. The doctor replied, “She has insurance, but unfortunately the insurance company has just canceled her policy five minutes ago. I’m sorry son, but it seems that she will just have to go without care until she’s dead as a beached whale.” The doctor shook his head and slowly walked away. And so he stayed with his dead mother’s bloated corpse outside on the sidewalk next to the hospital, wondering what to do, when a butcher came up and said, “See here son, ever since the Republicans have disbanded the FDA, all the animals and meat have become contaminated with different diseases, and I can’t get the meat I need for my shop. However, I’m sure my customers can’t tell the difference between obese woman meat and pig meat, so can I pay you twenty bucks to butcher her? It isn’t like the government is going to regulate my business anymore." So Billy agreed, and the butcher took out his cleaver and started chopping the mommy fat for his sausages.
    As Billy walked away, he realized that it was election day. He voted Republican.
    The American flag flutters on a windless day, moved by patriotism
     
  2. Neon

    Neon ネオン
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    Get down on your hands and knees and suck my republican cock, trolling piece of shit.

    How do you like them apples?

    Typical lefty garbage - yeah, those republicans are all fat hypocritical redneck baby fuckers, amirite? Better to have radical socialists with ties to terrorism and union mafia bosses running this country. Got it.


    Go away.
     
  3. fletcher

    fletcher Darkness always says hello.
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  4. Pigdango

    Pigdango Silence, you mortal Fuck!
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    I don't think that story is true.
     
  5. Atomic Fireball

    Atomic Fireball Well-Known Member
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    What's the post count for starting threads?
     
  6. MayrMeninoCrash

    MayrMeninoCrash Liberal Psycopath

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    I want to hear the Democrat version with Shanequa and her 10 burdens making her list of gimmedats to the MAN.
     
  7. Neon

    Neon ネオン
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    Too bad republicans don't sink that low. :icon_cool
     
  8. whiskeyguy

    whiskeyguy PR representative for Drunk Whiskeyguy.

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    I think you just summed it up. :action-sm

    By the way, I take a lot of offense to that story. I might be considered a hick by most (grew up on a dairy, do a lot of hunting and fishing, raised animals as a kid) and while I don't see myself as one I often vote Republican... but I'll have you know I would definitely stop fucking my mom before she reached 400 pounds. Stop spreading stereotypes.
     
  9. CostaTheCrazyGreek

    CostaTheCrazyGreek Registered User

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    Don't care what you white trash Republicans think. I loffed and loffed and loffed. And Neon, it's Mr. trolling piece of shit sir to you.
     
  10. Neon

    Neon ネオン
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    That's because you have the sense of humor of an 8 year old autistic retard.
     
  11. Mags

    Mags Edgelord
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    I'm all for bashing Republicans (and democrats) but there wasn't much funny in that boring story you posted.

    Be more funny.
     
  12. CostaTheCrazyGreek

    CostaTheCrazyGreek Registered User

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    and I love you too (no homo)
     
  13. The Godfather

    The Godfather Spark it up for The Godfather and say!!!!!

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  14. Pigdango

    Pigdango Silence, you mortal Fuck!
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    The only thing funny is how poorly written the following sentence is:

     
  15. Party Rooster

    Party Rooster Unleash The Beast

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    [​IMG]

    Dude's got more seniority than just about every mod on here. :icon_eek:
     
  16. Pigdango

    Pigdango Silence, you mortal Fuck!
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    Back in those days it was just him, Stingray, and Spotcheck Billy hanging around here dreaming of the day when they'd be able to get 15 replies to a thread in a day.
     
  17. kloraferm

    kloraferm Humor is reason gone mad

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    Politics are for old children
     
  18. Creasy Bear

    Creasy Bear gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh
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    Selden, Long Island.

    Hey, shouldn't you be down at the 7-11 with the rest of your faggot ass liberal buddies blowing wetback day laborers? You bleeding heart liberals on that horrid island sure do love to lick illegal beaner balls and make them feel loved and appreciated, don't you?

    Hey! Form a line, vatos! No need to push and shove... Costa will make sure and drain all of your sweaty brown ball sacks for you.

    [​IMG]
     
  19. CostaTheCrazyGreek

    CostaTheCrazyGreek Registered User

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    Actually it's Farmingville where that happens asswipe. Also I'm pretty antisocial myself, I hate people as a general rule.
     
  20. Creasy Bear

    Creasy Bear gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh
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    Yep... a ten minute drive south and you're licking beaner sack... that's what happens alright.
     
  21. CostaTheCrazyGreek

    CostaTheCrazyGreek Registered User

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    Bro, keep telling yourself that if it makes you happy.
     
  22. Creasy Bear

    Creasy Bear gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh
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    Go ahead and rot on your shitty beaner-infested island if it makes you happy.
     
  23. CostaTheCrazyGreek

    CostaTheCrazyGreek Registered User

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    Bro if I had the "disposable income" my ass would be in Canada, watching the castle called the USA come crashing down. Fundamentally speaking, I have no respect for anyone or anything.
     
  24. Party Rooster

    Party Rooster Unleash The Beast

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    That writer was really a redundant ass. I can't remember, how much did the mother weigh again? :icon_roll

    Then there's this...

    Don't forget SonOfSpaz...:)
     
  25. Neon

    Neon ネオン
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    Thanks for the douche chills, MAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!
     

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