House - What the F, Bro?

Pigdango

Silence, you mortal Fuck!
Donator
Jun 22, 2004
76,359
49,271
788
#1
So my house sucks.

My gutter system needs to be replaced - $4800

My roof has been leaking for several years due to a bunch of scrubs doing a shitty job installing the roof around the skylights in my kitchen - $5,100

Now my basement has water in it. I thought I found the problem, a golf ball sized hole in the wall. But no, that would be too easy. Turns out that while some of the water might be from the hole, most of it is because I live in East Amherst, NY - home of the Sinking Home. My entire basement is basically fucked - $10,000



Anyone got $20,000 they can lend me?
 

fletcher

Darkness always says hello.
Donator
Feb 20, 2006
59,552
19,736
513
jersey
#2


Actually, I am also dealing with similar issues. Shitty gutters and a shitty roof can really fuck your house up. I also have sinking house issues. Its not fun.
 

JoeyDVDZ

That's MR. MOJO, Motherfucker!
Aug 20, 2004
29,012
5,654
693
#3
Leak around chimney - check.
Livingroom ceiling sheetrock soggy and falling apart due to said leak - check.
Crack in basement wall which is a load bearing wall - check.
Driveway that requires basically being replaced due to cracks - check.
Basement that floods if the weather even gets cloudy - check.
Added bonus - tiny toads that come into basement via gap in basement door during rainstorms - check.

Wanna trade? :)
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
46,710
6,873
693
F.U.B.A.R
#4
Twenty grand at 100% interest, compounded daily, call Western Sky Financial. :eek:
 

the Streif

¡¡¡¡sıʞunɹɹɹɹɹɹɹℲ
Donator
Aug 25, 2002
15,168
5,985
861
In a hot tub having a snow ball fight.
#6
Leak around chimney - check.
Livingroom ceiling sheetrock soggy and falling apart due to said leak - check.
Crack in basement wall which is a load bearing wall - check.
Driveway that requires basically being replaced due to cracks - check.
Basement that floods if the weather even gets cloudy - check.
Added bonus - tiny toads that come into basement via gap in basement door during rainstorms - check.

Wanna trade? :)
Safe that can't be opened - check.
 

Pigdango

Silence, you mortal Fuck!
Donator
Jun 22, 2004
76,359
49,271
788
#7
What type of gutter system costs $4800?
I have 60' tall Ash trees on either side of my house, dropping propellers in the spring and a metric ton of leaves in the fall. So we are getting the Leaf Guard model. I also have a 2 story home that has 4 different levels of roof, so I need a lot of gutters. I am also considering heated gutters on the one section that is behind my Family Room. Due to the Cathedral ceiling, we get a considerable amount of ice damming unless i go out and roof rake after every snowfall of more than 3 inches. I live in Buffalo... The price alao includes them adding two additional downspouts because my current system on the lower back section looks like a Rube Goldberg contraption. The estimate also includes some vent work.

Aren't you glad you asked?
 

Ballbuster1

In The Danger Zone...
Wackbag Staff
Aug 26, 2002
103,083
16,688
839
Your house, behind the couch
#8
Just had to have some stuff done on mine.
16 g's for what the contractor did and I still have some
interior prep and paint work to do.

After that, the appliances are getting long in the tooth so
1 at a time I'm gonna replace them. A never ending cycle.
 

whiskeyguy

PR representative for Drunk Whiskeyguy.
Donator
Jan 12, 2010
36,412
22,048
398
Northern California
#9
I have 60' tall Ash trees on either side of my house, dropping propellers in the spring and a metric ton of leaves in the fall. So we are getting the Leaf Guard model. I also have a 2 story home that has 4 different levels of roof, so I need a lot of gutters. I am also considering heated gutters on the one section that is behind my Family Room. Due to the Cathedral ceiling, we get a considerable amount of ice damming unless i go out and roof rake after every snowfall of more than 3 inches. I live in Buffalo... The price alao includes them adding two additional downspouts because my current system on the lower back section looks like a Rube Goldberg contraption. The estimate also includes some vent work.

Aren't you glad you asked?
Actually yes... it will make me feel better if I ever have to replace gutters on my house. :action-sm
 
Dec 8, 2004
49,036
21,077
693
Maine
#10
Wish my roof was $5 100 to replace... 25 year asphalt shingle with ice and water guard and new flashings etc 22k if I want a metal roof 25k... a boooo.

Luckily you don't have slate my chicks friend just a repair done to their slate roof in Salem... 16k.
 

CougarHunter

Lying causes cat piss smell.
Mar 2, 2006
10,590
2,570
566
KC Metro
#11
I replaced my gutters 10 years ago myself for $400. I bid to have them done again this past summer with decent seamless gutters - about a grand. Sheeeeeit.

I'll check again when the weather turns and the siding guys start needing work.
 

Motor Head

HIGHWAY TRASH REMOVAL
Jan 23, 2006
10,385
419
243
Land of hicks and rubes.
#12
This is why I want to eventually sell my house and move into a condo downtown. I think it would be cool to live in a building with a built in grocery store, nice restaurants and a movie theater. If something breaks, call the fix it guy.
 

lajikal

Registered User
Aug 6, 2009
15,932
3,849
373
#13
$6,600 on a new roof couple months back. Fuck you! But no more leaky.
 
Dec 8, 2004
49,036
21,077
693
Maine
#14
This is why I want to eventually sell my house and move into a condo downtown. I think it would be cool to live in a building with a built in grocery store, nice restaurants and a movie theater. If something breaks, call the fix it guy.
Hate people... so could not do that. Lived in an apartment between houses hated going up the elevator and smelling everybody's cooking especially the Filipinos... we get it you guys like fish.
 

Motor Head

HIGHWAY TRASH REMOVAL
Jan 23, 2006
10,385
419
243
Land of hicks and rubes.
#15
Hate people... so could not do that. Lived in an apartment between houses hated going up the elevator and smelling everybody's cooking especially the Filipinos... we get it you guys like fish.
No such things take place at Aryan Towers. The place we are thinking about is pretty pricey. Pricey enough that my patrol car will be sitting in an underground parking garage with a bunch of German cars. The only riff-raff in the building will be the cleaning ladies and me.
 
Dec 8, 2004
49,036
21,077
693
Maine
#16
No such things take place at Aryan Towers. The place we are thinking about is pretty pricey. Pricey enough that my patrol car will be sitting in an underground parking garage with a bunch of German cars. The only riff-raff in the building will be the cleaning ladies and me.
Well the house we were moving into wasn't ready so we had to rent this place for like 2 or 3 months... I think my parents sublet it from someone... really can't remember. Well except that smell... gah.