if you were president,What would you change?

Earth2murf

HATES EVERYONE!!!
Apr 2, 2005
6,605
1,293
423
Rotten County NY
#1
ok never mind President,suppose you were dictator of the united States with no pesky liberals to get in your way,what would you change?....as for me i would deport all wet-backs unless they look like Selma Hyack .I would build a 100 foot wall around the whole USA.and send all our homeless and jailbirds to canada.Also make Ron Bennington the head of the CIA and the FCC.
 

Guysdrinkingbeer

Lt. in O & A army.
Nov 3, 2002
195
1
416
Cleveland, OH.
#2
1 Build the wall. Simple, but it works.

2 Remove natural born citizen from the rules. No more anchor babies. Canada had this till the early eighties. They removed it because the son of a Chinese immigrants saw a huge problem on the way.

3 Balance the budget and pay off the debt. I have two sacred cows that do not get touched when budgets are cut. Education and defense in that order. The rest get a 10% cut across the board. A 1% sales tax on everything goes to the debt. The full sum of money earned by this tax goes to the debt. Congress can touch it one bit. (Remember I am the dictator)

4 Offer a 25 dollar a check increase in welfare and other government benefits for recipients who receive birth control shots. No pill to miss and prevents other children from being born into a bad situation.

5 More and better prisons. Harsher penalties for truly violent crimes. Prison also becomes a two tier system. 1st is about punishment, the second is about rehabilitation.

6 People can own guns. Period. You want to carry, you need training.

These are just I came up with off the top of my head.
 

Sutsu

O&A Po'ty ROCK!
Dec 7, 2004
1,647
0
0
Staten Cancer
#3
I agree with building the wall.

Change the 14th amendment of the constitution so that all children born within the United States receive the citizenship status of their parents.

If you are an illegal immigrant and you commit a crime, you get sent back as soon as the word 'guilty' comes out of your mouth or the jury's mouth. If it is for a violent felony and you show up in the US again, you get the chair. You are, of course, thoroughly warned of this possibility before your first deportation.

Push for the legalization of illegal immigrants already in the US as follows:
-Own up and register yourself as an illegal immigrant before a deadline. If you do not register and you're found, you get deported.
-Once registered, if you have a criminal record that includes violent crimes or a propensity to commit crimes, you are deported. If you're in a jail during the registration period, you're most likely deported.
-All remaining illegal immigrants must enroll in English classes as well as American History classes. Citizenship will not be granted until they can pass basic proficiency exams in both subjects. NO government public assistance will be offered until both these exams are passes.
-All remaining illegal immigrants much also disclose how long they have been in the US and pay appropriate back-taxes up to a certain monetary amount. The IRS would work with them to set up a fair timetable and amount to pay. At this point, government public assistance will be offered so long as immigrant continues to pay both current and back taxes.

National guidelines for identification. Not a national ID, but set up guidelines for each state so that they can issue and create their own identification but that ID must fit certain criteria as far as what information must be included on it, what tamper-proofing safeguards should be on it, and how to go about getting it.

Put the election of the Senate back in the hands of the elected officials of the state.

Work to repeal Roe v Wade and make it a states-rights issue.

Constitutional amendment defining civil unions as any domestic partnership between two consenting adults performed in by the government and defining marriage as any domestic partnership between two consenting adults performed by a religious institution, regardless of the genders of the people involved.

Drill ANWR.

End NAFTA.

Repeal the McCain-Feingold act limiting freedom of speech during elections.

Kick the UN to the curb like the aids infested hooker that it is.

End all presently existing taxes and enact a national consumption tax built into the price of all new goods and services, based on Neil Boortz book "The Fair Tax". Pool that money into a publicly viewable account and make the federal budget completely viewable to the public so that they know where their money is going.

Enact a federal gun law that allows all citizens the right to carry a concealed handgun provided the person passes a psychological background check, a yearly handgun safety course and does not have a criminal record that includes any violent infractions of the law, such as ****, assault, reckless endangerment, burglary, robbery, menacing, et al.
 

Glenn Dandy

THE ONLY WHITE PRESIDENT LEFT.
Mar 21, 2005
19,758
35
298
Wackbag Whitehouse.
#5
Its too late....... just short of a Hitler style massacre.

too many years of looking the other way.


But, I honestly would make laws governing gouging.

Cable TV sells advertising just like it did when it was free.... now it costs me 100.00 a month... bullshit

Electric, Gas, Taxes, a fucking raw roast costs 15.00 bullshit!

Gasoline? fuck these douches fucking over the small business man who relies on fuel to generate an income so they can buy more mansions and yachts. Bullshit.

bottom line..... fair cost of living. So Americans can enjoy their lives again.... Its a motherfucking ratrace just surviving anymore.
 

TrybalRage

Registered User
Aug 5, 2004
2,035
2
533
Kennesaw, GA
#6
Pretty much follow the ideals of the guy in my sig.

Don't really agree on the 'no death penalty' part, but I can give that up to get other things.
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
46,802
6,920
763
F.U.B.A.R
#7
First, I would repeal any and all unconstitutional laws. Second, restore our once great nation to the Constitutional Republic it is suppose to be. Third, all useless "Departments" would be shown a very quick exit (Department of Homeland Security, Department of Education, blah, blah, blah...) including our membership in the UN and such. Fourth, recall all US forces not protecting our borders. Fifth, appeal to all citizens to take up arms when there is a danger to their communities (e.g. gangbangers running amok would be dispatched forthwith.) Sixth, bring back tar and feathering for those that don't get "it."
 
Feb 20, 2006
8,646
549
521
**** Island
#8
The first thing I would do is behead my vice-president on live televison. Let'm know I'm not fucking around.
 

Chin nuts

Your breath smells like a dead baby's coffin.
Mar 17, 2006
809
17
323
Island Park, NY
#10
Dissolve the DEA and repeal all the draconian drug laws. Probably the biggest money pit this country has ever founded. Treat them like the legal poisons allowed now such as alcohol, and tobacco. If you want to kill yourself it's your buisiness not the government. Most of the problems with drugs are because they're forced underground causing much more illegal activities.

Enact a two year public service commitment for all between the ages of 18-25 years old. You would have the choice of serving in the military or other public agency such as WPA. Rebuilding the infrastructure such as roads, bridges, dams etc.

Bring back all foreign based military personnell for real home land defense needs. Strengthen the lax borders between Canada and Mexico.

Eliminate all taxes and replace with a use tax on all goods sold/consumed.

Make education, and health care for all citizens the best the world has ever seen. Make health care a basic right for all not just the ones who can afford it.

Abolish all bi-lingual publications etc. You want to be a citizen of the US speak English.

No more welfare or public assistance of any kind unless you work or have worked and have enough credits earned. Sterlize all welfare breeders after the second child.



Give everyone puppies because they're so adorable and kill all cats.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
142,465
50,257
644
#11
1) Reform/Change the drug laws. This would be first and formost. Legalize pot and other drugs. Overturn convictions for minor things such as possession. The drug laws in this country are fucking ridiculous. The amount of court time and prison space used for minor drug offenders is ridiculous. The lives ruined just because some otherwise good kid wanted to get high. And yes, it's selfish because I'd love legalized drugs.

2) Better focus on science; fuck religion and make sure the voters know I say fuck religion. Sorry churches, no more tax breaks

3) Smaller government all around.

4) Conduct research into the occult

5a) Don't sacrifice my dignity by sucking the cocks of other nations. No silly dances with Nigerians, no making out with Saudi princes (in public).

5b) Don't sacrifice my dignity on the domestic front. No MC Liddy. No inviting the top 12 of American Idol to the White House, if I'm inviting anyone from Idol, it'll be McPhee and for my own reasons.

6) Implement some standard of accountability to the governmental Departments and do what I can to limit the waste. So afraid of terrorism? Then fine, do something about the borders.

7) Make my State of the Union address some Carlin-esque rant. SOTUs stink. Time to fuck it up. Really say the problems in this country.

8) Get some really smooth black guy to hang around with.

and why is this in current events and not like off topic/bizarro?
 

Max Johnson

Registered User
Oct 14, 2004
317
0
0
#12
Isn't it amazing how many people want to get rid of the illegals yet the prez is all fired up to keep em here? Was his mama a wetback? I've never seen a politician so motivated to do anything, never mind something that so many people are against.

I'd up the quota of legal immigrants allowed in every year. This will take care of all the whiny pro illegal arguments.

Make English the national language and you must show proficiency in it (reading, writing, speaking) in order to get in here. No more gov't forms in any other language for damn sure and huge corps would be actively encouraged to stop having the language of choice of the criminal invaders clogging up their phone menus, ATM's, and quit printing the name of the products at the grocery store in our language and one other language. Why not print it in Japanese too? Oh yeah - the Japanese actually learn our language and contribute positively to our society. Way to reward the lazy trespassers.

Actively arrest and deport all illegals already in the country. Sorry boys, you should have left and came back when you had the chance. If they want to be dicks about it, then we'll start branding them on the arm on the way out. 3rd strike and you don't get a parachute when we throw your ass out of the plane over your country of origin.

A LOT of gov't reform. Demand accountability from the biggest criminals in our country (politicians). No more bullshit trips or hometown pork. Limit campaign budgets significantly so that not only the rich can run PLUS if the budgets is both limited and accounted for then the politicians will be less susceptible to the corporate/foreign bribes that actually run this country today. Maybe have a hugely promoted TV show twice per year showing the biggest transgressions of all those assholes in gov't (congressional hypocrites). Who isn't showing up. Who is demanding millions to perform unnecessary tasks. Who is hiring his half retarded brother. Shit like that.

Demand basic driver tests for old people. Maybe even just a brief physical to test eyes and reflexes. Every 5 years after a certain age and maybe 2 years after another age.

Make cops pass a basic physical test every 5 years with the difficulty tied to their age. They want to demand more pay because of the deadly job (that they went into on their own with no gun to their head), then they can make an effort to stay in shape at that job. Saw a hugely fat cop the other day which made me think of this one. Their initial test is unrealistically hard but then they can blob up with no repercussions. Oh yeah...this brings me onto

Gender inequality. If chicks want to be fireguys or cops or soldiers then they can either pass the same test as the men or get out. What's the problem? That's not realistic? Well a criminal resisting arrest isn't going to go any easier on you because you have a vagina. If anything he's going to stick it in your ass for good measure. I know that you need a certain amount of chick cops to do the chick searches and all that so if the chicks can only pass the modified chick standards then they can get in but they get modified chick pay too. If you can do half of the pushups then you can get half of the reward. Also if long hair makes a male soldier subject to bad hygiene or an enemy using it as a weapon against him then so are females. All female soldiers, cops, ... are subject to the same grooming standards as the males.

If you're on welfare for more than a certain amount of time then you need to get sterilized in order to keep receiving checks.

Break up the gas monopoly. Yes monopoly. If 5 guys in my area own all the pizza shops and they agree to charge $5 per slice then I'll just open up my own and charge $2 and make a killing. That's impossible with oil companies. Way too expensive for any competitors to realistically step in. 4 of the top 10 highest profits in the country were gas companies. Quit playing the fucking poor me bullshit and blaming OPEC. It's our assholes over here who are making plenty of fucking money.
 

SOS

ONA
Wackbag Staff
Aug 14, 2000
48,194
8,897
1,038
USA
#14
I love how everyone says welfare. Someone call Exxon-Mobil. But that's fine.
Are you coming from the grants/tax breaks or an environmentalist perspective?

:icon_wink


Btw, I am in favor of giving more low interest loans and grants to poor people.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
142,465
50,257
644
#15
I love how everyone says welfare. Someone call Exxon-Mobil. But that's fine.
It's not really welfare people have problems with. It's blacks and Latinos, the true threat to this country (if I have to see that two page 'Hoy' version of a newspaper again so help me God).

I'd also try to promote literacy tests for voting, limit corporate influence in the government, not treat the press like they're bottomfeeders, have people in my cabinet of conflicting points of view, figure if there was some way to require birfing licenses, and promote culture.
 
#16
Are you coming from the grants/tax breaks or an environmentalist perspective?

:icon_wink


Btw, I am in favor of giving more low interest loans and grants to poor people.
I'm not for them. make your own way across the board. That goes from the mother of twelve who keeps pumpin em out to get a check, or the tax breaks we give oil companies to farmers who get paid to sit on their asses.

I don't believe in government grants, or loans, or subsidies, or "investments" I do not believe in any form of taking the wealth one person makes from an honest living and redistributing it to another person "in need' whatsoever.

In order for the government to disperse a single dollar for anything it deems as worthy it has to take that dollar from someone else who worked for it. And that in my mind is anti what this country is supposed to be for.
 
#17
It's not really welfare people have problems with. It's blacks and Latinos, the true threat to this country (if I have to see that two page 'Hoy' version of a newspaper again so help me God).
You are absolutely correct. Because if anyone actually cared to check before spouting off about welfare they'd know the single biggest beneficiary demographic from it are white women. Same goes for affirmitive action.
 

thrawn42

Hackmaster Jones Sr.
Jul 26, 2005
1,443
0
281
Seattle
#18
1) Nuke Tehran and possibly Damascus

2) Any person found to be directly associated with any terrorist act or planned terrorist action against the United States is interrogated and then put to death. No exceptions. And yes, this is after a fair trial to determine guilt.

4) Set a deadline for all illegals in the US to go through a
rigorous naturalization process. If they fail to meet the deadline or fail any sort of background check they are to be arrested and deported. If they come back they go to prison.

5) Order all companies manufacturing automotives and any company that wants to export automotives to the US to solely provide vehicles that do not output toxic emissions and cheap conversion possibilities for those that do currently run on gasoline. All those that do run on gasoline to be phased out and impounded within a reasonable time frame. (This excludes special use. e.g. large construction vehicles.)
This is for two reasons: 1) Fuck pollution. 2) Fuck those who sell us oil.
Manufacturer deadline: 5 years max.
That is unless they want to lose US business entirely. Money is a great motivator.
Public use deadline: 15 years max.

6) Parallel to the previous dictate: 1) Mandate the production of free, convenient, and expedient public transportations to all areas of the US where it is necessary. 2) A complete overhaul of all of this country's major roadways to not only include an increase in size to compensate for the country's transportation needs but also to do so in an innovative fashion (think Minority Report).

7) The FCC's censorship capabilities are completely eliminated. In fact in honor of that, the FCC building in DC is razed to the ground.

8) Police have a more free hand in dealing with protestors by using non-lethal force and mass arrests if necessary. Necessary meaning the elimination of violent protests. Typical WTO protestors are a good example.

9) All state laws concerning the ban on gay marriage are immediately repealed. Further similar votes are also banned. (You can't have a public vote to determine someone else's civil rights, dipshits.)

10) As major providers of UN funding, we treat it like a petulant child when it acts like one. That is to say if we feel the UN is not providing for the world interest and is instead placating special interest groups (under the guise of 'fairness' or 'diversity,' etc.) we cut off US overfunding of the institution indefinitely.
 

Schmed

I'm a corpse without a soul...
Nov 4, 2002
2,356
0
0
Shitsville, NY
#19
If you're on public assistance, you don't vote.

If you don't speak English, you don't vote.

If you did not graduate High School, you don't vote.

I'd get rid of the electoral system, and make it about the popular vote.

Each presidential candidate has a 1 hour special on HBO outlining their history, stance, etc.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
142,465
50,257
644
#20
10) As major providers of UN funding, we treat it like a petulant child when it acts like one. That is to say if we feel the UN is not providing for the world interest and is instead placating special interest groups (under the guise of 'fairness' or 'diversity,' etc.) we cut off US overfunding of the institution indefinitely.
Here's one thing I don't get and it's a general question and don't take this as me supporting the UN. Why is what we say right and what the UN say wrong? Like why is what they consider "world interest" so wrong and our take on "world interest" so right, especially when we're just as guilty of placating special interest groups over fairness and diversity.

Schmed said:
Each presidential candidate has a 1 hour special on HBO outlining their history, stance, etc.
Why make it HBO? Why not make it legitimately fair and have it on networks where more people can see it. Some people with money don't even have HBO. Do it on all the networks, no commercials, no interruptions and if he wants to go longer, he can. Stop trying to wrap up debates and States of the Unions to be able to get your shitty news start on time.

Also, after reading about Stanhope, make it easier for third parties to become legitimate contenders in the political system.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
142,465
50,257
644
#22
The part about nuking places was original though. Oh if it were that easy. To do the things we accuse so many others of. I have no idea what is with this generation of people. Seriously.
If you don't nuke it, how do you expect to put Starbuckses there?
 

Schmed

I'm a corpse without a soul...
Nov 4, 2002
2,356
0
0
Shitsville, NY
#24
9) All state laws concerning the ban on gay marriage are immediately repealed. Further similar votes are also banned. (You can't have a public vote to determine someone else's civil rights, dipshits.)
Where do you draw the line ?, what if NAMBLA feels it's their right to love boys ? is it wrong for the public vote to "violate" their civil rights ? You can argue that there is clearly a difference between gay rights and pedophilia, but 50 years ago if "gay rights" was ever mentioned, you'd be shot, so 50 years from now what if the same argument was brought up for man-boy love ?
 

thrawn42

Hackmaster Jones Sr.
Jul 26, 2005
1,443
0
281
Seattle
#25
Here's one thing I don't get and it's a general question and don't take this as me supporting the UN. Why is what we say right and what the UN say wrong? Like why is what they consider "world interest" so wrong and our take on "world interest" so right, especially when we're just as guilty of placating special interest groups over fairness and diversity.
There is actually a reason that despite all of Bush's garbage, the US is still looked upon as a world leading nation. In addition to our economic power and despite the overly intense scrutiny, there is a lot more going right in this country than there is in much of the rest of the world.
I suggest you take a closer look at some of the goings-on at UN meetings and the resultant actions and inactions. They play out more like a parliamentary or congressional power struggle than how a world body should act. Forming coalitions via lobbying efforts is not it. The UN is for nations nations to decide on world issues based on what is representative of that country's identity. It's not the place to decide some other nations fate via lucrative trade deals and the like. That includes US behavior as well, but more often than not we have enough power to block the bulk of the ridiculousness that spews forth from typical UN corruption.