Kevin Smith Turning 'Clerks' into a Trilogy

BIV

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Oh Kevin...

Kevin Smith Turning 'Clerks' into a Trilogy

December 7, 2012 / clerks 3, kevin smith, movie, news, television

Kevin Smith's plans for retiring, staying at home, and slipping into a really roomy pair of shorts have been put on hold for the sake of telling the full dramatic arc of Clerks.

Smith had previously expressed the desire to do only one more feature, that being his The Goon-like hockey film Hit Somebody, based on the Warren Zevon song of the same name. Only problem is, that film has now apparently expanded to six hours of hockey dialogue that is all too good to cut, which makes it pretty hard to put in theaters, even if he does go around showing it himself. So now, just as Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back ended up not quite being the View Askewniverse finale it was originally pitched as, Hit Somebody will no longer be Smith's final directorial effort: now Hit Somebody will be a six-hour miniseries, and, per Smith's own words, "with the HIT SOMEBODY shift, the minute Jeff Anderson signs on, my last cinematic effort as a writer/director will be CLERKS III." And thusly, Kevin Smith will still get his official, premeditated "last cinematic effort." And he will also get his Roots, apparently.
http://www.iwatchstuff.com/2012/12/kevin-smith-turning-clerks-into-a-trilog.php
 

Pigdango

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There's only one Clerks movie.
 

fletcher

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I thought he was doing a Jay and Bob animated feature as the finale? If there really is going to be a Clerks 3 (please no) it better be in black and white and have a budget of nothing. It would be fitting and it would help get tubby back to his roots.
 

gleet

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Jul 24, 2005
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Six hours of hockey talk? Fuuuuccckkkk. Slap Shot was perfect. Less dialogue, more Hansens.
 

Absolutely

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I'm not going to lie, I never really loved "Clerks".
And I hardly remember seeing Clerks 2, aside from Rosario Dawson being hot.

I love other KS movies, but I don't completely get the Clerks love.
 

LiddyRules

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So Hit Somebody went from one movie to two movies to a mini-series?

And I sincerely doubt Clerks III will be his final movie.

And, because I need to say it every time it's brought up, I despise Clerks II in so many ways. So, so many ways. Yet I loved the Clerks Animated Series oddly enough. But Clerks II, it honestly felt like they shit over something special. In my mind, possibly worse than the prequels did to the original trilogy.
 

ruckstande

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Sorry folks, I love Clerks 2. I don't see what was wrong with it. Besides, it's way better than Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.
 

Konstantin K

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Clerks II was completely unnecessary but I still liked it. I don't think a ton of people of clamoring for another one.

The hockey movie could bloat into a Ken Burns-esque mini series and I would still be excited for it.

But Clerks II, it honestly felt like they shit over something special. In my mind, possibly worse than the prequels did to the original trilogy.
You're insane.

Sorry folks, I love Clerks 2. I don't see what was wrong with it. Besides, it's way better than Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.
Yeah, I never understood the love for Strike Back.
 

fletcher

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Sorry folks, I love Clerks 2. I don't see what was wrong with it. Besides, it's way better than Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.
Yeah, I never understood the love for Strike Back.
You two need to get a room. Strike Back is one fantastic inside joke gem of a movie. The movie is fantastic.
 

Neckbeard

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Strike Back is better than Clerks II and I like both of them. I'd rather not see a Clerks III though.
 

OccupyWackbag

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Strike Back and Clerks 1 & 2 are fantastic movies.
 

LiddyRules

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I can explain (and read my entire explanation before giving me shit). Clerks I felt like a personal movie. There was an intimacy to what Dante/Randall went through, that it felt like things a human being would have either gone through or would have imagined while they were bored at their job. It was at, for lack of a better explanation, 1.5x reality. Slightly off, but still something relatable. The moral at the end, how they got there, the tiredness at the end of the day. It felt gritty, it felt real. And no matter what happened, it still felt like just another day.

Clerks II everything was Hollywoodized, it was 6x reality. The jokes were tamer (you're telling me ass to mouth is in the same fucking ballpark as snowballing) and the dialogue lacked personality (when they discussed the movies in Clerks I, it felt like a real discussion; in Clerks II, you have someone vomiting because Randall used dirty words). Nothing felt human and while both movies had over-the-top moments, Clerks I felt more Louie while Clerks II felt more Family Guy. They separated the main relationship (Dante and Randall) by giving Randall Pillow Pants (horrible character) and Dante Rosario Dawson. The chick in this movie was Rosario Fucking Dawson. And while I understand people at their ages would be concerns about being parents or husbands, I just didn't feel the connection that was there in Clerks I.

And with the movie constantly being so cartoony (without being nearly as funny as the Clerks cartoon), it felt cheap and undeserved giving it an introspective ending. Not only that I was a little pissed that Quickstop and RST became their mecca. The happiest years of their lives. The place they yearned to return to. It's one thing about being stuck in your life so you continue doing the same job over and over again and dealing with the same shitty customers at the same low pay. But choosing to return to that place, even if they were owners or co-owners or whatever, is a depressing fucking proposition.

(Needless to say, if Clerks II was actually funny, I wouldn't have minded as much. But it wasn't. And if Alec Baldwin appeared in person or in cartoon form as Leonardo Leonardo, I probably would cut the movie slack for that alone.)

EDIT: With Star Wars, the original Star Wars was a fun action-adventure movie, but I wouldn't really say it was about something personal. The prequels were boringly, horribly made action-adventure movies, but I don't think it took away from the original trilogy. It's easy enough to separate the two franchises. It's harder for me to do that with Clerks II because it's the same people, same actors, same timeline, same universe, etc.

Yeah, I never understood the love for Strike Back.
It was a silly movie for the fans, and I appreciated that.
 

Konstantin K

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I totally understand and even agree with a lot of your points but this is where we diverge:
(Needless to say, if Clerks II was actually funny, I wouldn't have minded as much. But it wasn't.)
I got plenty of laughs out of it. It's not the kind of movie that you'll be quoting decades later but I still feel like most of the jokes landed.

I liked the fact that they took it to "6x reality" because (as you said) the first one was such a unique and personal movie that there was no way they were going to recreate that feeling. Trying to do it in the same way would have been a disaster. Since KS insisted on doing a sequel, making it a broader comedy was probably the only way to go.
 

Pigdango

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Sorry folks, I love Clerks 2. I don't see what was wrong with it. Besides, it's way better than Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.
Where in fucks name is the unlike, boo, or hate button?
 

LiddyRules

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I liked the fact that they took it to "6x reality" because (as you said) the first one was such a unique and personal movie that there was no way they were going to recreate that feeling.Trying to do it in the same way would have been a disaster. Since KS insisted on doing a sequel, making it a broader comedy was probably the only way to go.
I disagree. It's like you're saying that as directors age, they can no longer tackle personal subjects, which is completely untrue. Although not exactly the same thing (since they're more romantic dramas than comedy), Richard Linklater made Before Sunrise in 1995 and Before Sunrise in 2004 and they felt like they came from the same place. Like I mentioned in my previous post, Louis CK. He's older than Kevin yet consistently uses 1.5x reality in ways that blow my mind. Hell, even Zack and Miri came closer to the spirit of Clerks than Clerks II did. I'm not saying that Clerks II should have replicated Clerks, but as an older filmmaker, Kevin could have brought a darker maturity to Clerks while still keeping it in the same comic realm.
 

whiskeyguy

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I liked Strike Back, forgot Clerks II one minute after seeing it, and enjoyed Clerks but not to the extent a lot of people did.
 

Bill Lehecka

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#22
Insecurity + fragile ego x pot use = A ruined Kevin Smith. Liddy said it perfectly: The moral was to return to your roots? Your depressing, shitty roots? This definitely seems like it's a parallel to Smith's life. He wants to do more, but he keeps coming back to the subject that made him who he is because he can't break from the chains of Clerks. Hit Somebody as a mini-series? That shit will die on Epix, no doubt.

It pains me to say that about him because he was a great, raw talent... But he bought into his own hype and became a man who embraced critics who built him up, but then told them "They're failed artists" and basically called them valueless when they didn't dig his work. How about standing on your own merit instead of being a whiny crybaby?

The more I think about it, the more I feel maybe Bruce Willis was justified in his actions.

Oh, and I hate the fact that he seems like a carnival barker at times, more interested in bilking his fans out of money rather than being genuine with his work.
 

Stormrider666

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Sorry folks, I love Clerks 2. I don't see what was wrong with it. Besides, it's way better than Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.
I like this post for what you said about Clerks 2. But I'm a still a huge fan of Strike Back.

I'm not going to lie, I never really loved "Clerks".
And I hardly remember seeing Clerks 2, aside from Rosario Dawson being hot.

I love other KS movies, but I don't completely get the Clerks love.
I'm convinced it was trendy for people to say they liked Clerks. Because these same people would turn around and say they hated Mall Rats. Which is still my favorite Kevin Smith movie.
 

Lord Zero

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I love Kevin Smith and I'll hope (against hope) for the best with this project, but he needs to crawl out of that constant weed haze he's in. That's not even a comment on his work. He's just constantly baked. It's depressing.

For the record, I loved Clerks II and Zack and Miri.
 

LiddyRules

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I like this post for what you said about Clerks 2. But I'm a still a huge fan of Strike Back.



I'm convinced it was trendy for people to say they liked Clerks. Because these same people would turn around and say they hated Mall Rats. Which is still my favorite Kevin Smith movie.
But Mallrats, which I very much enjoy, is a much different movie from Clerks. And if you were expecting something similar to Clerks (more of a dark comedy about misery than a pure comedy), I can see how Mallrats can be disappointing. And before you criticize me for liking the goofy Mallrats but not the goofy Clerks, I thought Mallrats was overall a more fun and funny movie that still had some heart to it. It was also very quotable and had Jason Lee really stealing the show.