Man Attacks Mom For Using His Taco Sauce

Dec 8, 2004
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#1


Christopher Phillips (left) and his girlfriend, Lisa Tyre (right) allegedly punched his mom over taco sauce, which would go on tacos (middle).

What a dip.

Cops jailed a Florida man and his girlfriend on Monday after the two allegedly attacked his mother because she used his salsa and taco sauce without permission, according to police reports obtained by the Smoking Gun.


Christopher Phillips, 23, started arguing with his mom, 55-year-old Rebecca, "because Rebecca used Christopher's salsa and taco sauce on her dinner," an officer wrote.

The saucy swindle apparently enraged the man -- he allegedly put his mother in such a crushing headlock that her glasses broke.

Christopher Phillips then went into another room to relay the horrific news to his girlfriend, Lisa Tyre, who then also began yelling at the mother. That argument escalated, leaving Rebecca Phillips with two smacks to the face and a cut lip.

When her son wouldn't let her have the keys to her car to leave, she walked to her husband's workplace, where they called cops.

Christopher Phillips was charged with domestic battery and held on a $750 bond. Tyre was released on her own recognizance the same day she was arrested.

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fletcher

Darkness always says hello.
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Feb 20, 2006
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#2
If it was Ortega taco sauce I would punch my mother too. That shit is the bomb.

 

Creasy Bear

gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh
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Mar 10, 2006
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#3
He only put her in a headlock? He showed incredible restraint. If my mom fucked with my taco sauce, I'd curb stomp the cunt. You don't fuck with a man's taco sauce.
 

Atomic Fireball

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Jul 26, 2005
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#4
It's shocking that something like this could happen in Florida
 

Motor Head

HIGHWAY TRASH REMOVAL
Jan 23, 2006
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#6
Let me guess. He lives at home with his girlfriend and was pissed off because his parents likely are making him pay rent or pay for his own food. So when she ate his taco sauce, it was headlock time.
 

Creasy Bear

gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh
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#7
he allegedly put his mother in such a crushing headlock that her glasses broke.
And she can't see nuttin' widout her glasses, goddamnit!
 

Yesterdays Hero

She's better than you, Smirkalicious.
Jan 25, 2007
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#11
Not clicking the spoiler. Names spoiled it. Does anyone play GTR anymore? Hide some things from the story ffs. Make it challenging.
 

lajikal

Registered User
Aug 6, 2009
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#12
Ahh huffpost you so clever with the bait n switch news story and posted videos.
 

unklewilly

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Nov 13, 2006
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#13
how did I know that by just looking at the thread title I knew it was from Florida?
 

Lord Zero

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Aug 25, 2008
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#14
he allegedly put his mother in such a crushing headlock that her glasses broke.
Being that it wasn't a choke hold, that's perfectly legal. That is, unless his mother was able to grab the ropes.

By the way, any word on whether or not her shoes came off?
 

Sunsetspawn

Registered User
Dec 5, 2005
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#22
you east coasters and your fake taco sauce

Hi Fenrir, I see you lurking

My Portareakin friend turned my on to this and it's been my favorite up until I read up on Sodium Benzoate. When that shit combines with vitamin C it turns into a carcinogen.

Of course this is coming from a guy who isn't enjoying life because he's afraid everything will kill him, so take it for what it's worth.
 

Warfarer

I can't think of anything funny.
Jun 20, 2005
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#23
some bitches just think that taco sauce grows on trees, like the guy can just walk out back and pick some more taco sauce off his magic tree. Fuck that bitch in her stupid butthole.
 

Chino Kapone

Yo, whats wrong wit da beer we got?
Jun 10, 2005
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#24
Can't tell guy from girl in op pic.



Would stab a bitch over some fire.