Okay, we can put a nail in the pageant coffin.

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
Apr 22, 2002
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#1
But only if you do it with your right arm. Can someone hold the nail for me?

Miss Iowa Pageant: Nicole Kelly Makes History as First Winner Without a Forearm

Celebrity Body June 11, 2013 AT 2:30PM By Fan Winston

Nicole Kelly, born without a forearm, wins the title of Miss Iowa. Credit: Jenn Cady Photography

Nicole Kelly had quite the weekend. Not only did she win Miss Iowa on Saturday, Jun. 8, after a tough three-day competition, but in doing so, she also became the first pageant winner in history missing a limb: Kelly was born without her left forearm.

The 23-year-old will now go on to compete at the Miss America Pageant Sept. 15 in Atlantic City, NJ. In her bio on the Miss Iowa pageant's website, the University of Nebraska at Lincoln graduate wrote about her disability.

"I was born without my left forearm. (Although, when people ask me what happened to my arm, I like to ask, 'Well, what do you think happened?' My favorite explanation to date has been that it was bitten off by a shark…a perfect explanation for someone from Iowa.) As I grew older, I learned to offset the initial stares I received from people with an outgoing personality that would not give in to 'No.' This meant that I tried everything! From baseball, to dance to diving, there was nothing I would not try," Kelly shared.

"I found my passion within a world where I was giving people permission to stare…the stage," she continued. A theater buff with hopes to one day become a Broadway Stage Manager, Kelly studied theater in college and even recently completed a stint on Broadway in the Tony-nominated play, The Assembled Parties.

Kelly won the judges over with a song from a Broadway musical, naturally: Wicked's "Defying Gravity."
Kelly won the judges over because she had no arm and they wanted to feel good about themselves and show everyone how "enlightened" they are.
Fixed.
 

Falldog

Wackbag's Best Conservative
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She has a freakishly large mouth.
 

Neon

ネオン
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Mar 23, 2008
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#11
That reminds me - LiddyRules - I saw an 8-9 with a baby arm yesterday. She was very skilled at hiding it under her shirt or whatever but I noticed. I still think I would rather bang hot girl with robot leg than hot girl with baby arm, but I would absolutely fuck this brawd. She was beautiful.
 

Hog's Big Ben

Getting ass-***** in The Octagon, brother.
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Jul 28, 2005
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Well, at least she's got an excuse for not being able to maintain her fingernails. Yuck.
 

gleet

What's black and white and red all over?
Jul 24, 2005
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#20
Nicole Kelly, born without a forearm
Born without a hand, too.

Kelly won the judges over because she had no arm and they wanted to feel good about themselves and show everyone how "enlightened" they are.
Bad news for her, at the Miss America pageant, she will be running against a Downs and a burn victim.

Bingo!!! I thought the same thing. Look at her right. . .err hand. That's a man hand.
Well, it does have to do twice the work of most girls hands.
 

Party Rooster

Unleash The Beast
Apr 27, 2005
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#22
The 23-year-old will now go on to compete at the Miss America Pageant Sept. 15 in Atlantic City, NJ.
Who in the hell thought this was a good idea? I'm totally at a loss of words over this. Absolutely perplexed, baffled, and befuddled I am.
 

Cunt Smasher

Caligula Jr.
Aug 26, 2005
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#23
She's done. Was recently busted faking fisting videos.
 
Feb 5, 2003
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#24
The 23-year-old will now go on to compete at the Miss America Pageant Sept. 15 in Atlantic City, NJ.​
Who in the hell thought this was a good idea? I'm totally at a loss of words over this. Absolutely perplexed, baffled, and befuddled I am.
While she's there, she's going to play blackjack--but just 1 hand.