Opie's ASS FUNK.......

Earth2murf

HATES EVERYONE!!!
Apr 2, 2005
6,605
1,293
423
Rotten County NY
#1
...this gives Linger Longer a whole new meaning......I get this same Funk now and then...Yesterday i was under the weather and went to bed early when my wife came to bed an hour or so later the whole room stunk of ass funk ,she had to open the windows and air the place out..It was 23 degress last night and i still didn't wake up....My ass was so swampy i slept in jeans so i wouldn't stain the bed............................ASS Funk Member #3.....oh yeah today my ass was nice and clean,no mess no stink:haha7::haha7:
 

Mags

LDAR, bitch.
Donator
Oct 22, 2004
34,893
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Ill Repute
#2
...this gives Linger Longer a whole new meaning......I get this same Funk now and then...Yesterday i was under the weather and went to bed early when my wife came to bed an hour or so later the whole room stunk of ass funk ,she had to open the windows and air the place out..It was 23 degress last night and i still didn't wake up....My ass was so swampy i slept in jeans so i wouldn't stain the bed............................ASS Funk Member #3.....oh yeah today my ass was nice and clean,no mess no stink:haha7::haha7:
That's um, great :icon_roll
 

SOS

ONA
Wackbag Staff
Aug 14, 2000
48,116
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#3
I remember when they called it the "dump sweats"

Linger Longer...
 

Photothing

Registered User
Feb 12, 2006
151
0
146
NYC
#5
I believe the linger loooonger term is: CRANKY ASS
 

Little Chuckie

Registered User
Jul 21, 2005
1,132
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#7
Hand lotion and baby wipes will help you guys if you can't make a quick trip to a shower or a bidet. You only have Ass Funk when you stop taking care of yourself or are ill.
 
Dec 19, 2005
1,652
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#9
Hand lotion and baby wipes will help you guys if you can't make a quick trip to a shower or a bidet. You only have Ass Funk when you stop taking care of yourself or are ill.
just a question....I get the baby wipe thing, but what do you do with hand lotion. I mean do you lube your ass with it? Jack off to enjoy the sickness? Lather it on the ass-cheeks?
Just wonderin,.:icon_eek:
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
46,670
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#10
Maybe Opie should get one of those Japanese toilets that cleans your ass, or a nanny to do it for him. :icon_mrgr
 
Dec 19, 2005
1,652
44
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#11
Maybe Opie should get one of those Japanese toilets that cleans your ass, or a nanny to do it for him. :icon_mrgr

and with all those tips he's giving out to the apartment staff, what would one more tip be for an ass wipe?
 

Party Rooster

Unleash The Beast
Apr 27, 2005
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#12

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
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#13
and with all those tips he's giving out to the apartment staff, what would one more tip be for an ass wipe?
The nanny should also be younger then the Eleven and hotter it that's some how possible. Just to keep her on her toes...
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
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#14
I use the wet wipes. They do go a long way towards helping out but aren't a cure-all.
 

Little Chuckie

Registered User
Jul 21, 2005
1,132
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#15
just a question....I get the baby wipe thing, but what do you do with hand lotion. I mean do you lube your ass with it? Jack off to enjoy the sickness? Lather it on the ass-cheeks?
Just wonderin,.:icon_eek:
Its something I picked up from a Korean Massage palour, basically it gets "everything" no matter how small detached from any hairs and off the ass. A little dab on the baby wipe is all it takes, I've had perfectly clean looking wipes and tried it - it always gets a bit more off.

I've actually had a few of the working ladys comment on clean my ass was, so I guess it works.
Edit: those little lotion bottles from hotels are easier to carry around than a baby wipe, you can use it on plain old toilet paper too.
 

Sinn Fein

Infidel and White Interloper
Wackbag Staff
Aug 29, 2002
31,444
2,154
818
Florida's Nature Coast
#16
I wonder if baby lotion would work better than hand lotion...

I am gonna have to investigate further.

Short of shaving my ass hair, I can't think of anything else to do that would give me better HY-GIENE back there.
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
Sep 15, 2004
46,670
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#18
If you have wispy hair, then removing as much hair as possible, helps greatly. (NO HOMO)

Showering well with a wash cloth has to be better then some silly soap cup.
 
Dec 19, 2005
1,652
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343
#19
nothing beats learning "the ways of the ass".

damn good info!
 

the_ba

Dierks! Get to the chopper! Daah ahhh!!
Jan 18, 2004
264
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Baton Rouge, LA
#23
Do what Norton does and hire prostitutes to clean it with their hands.
 

moegolden

Perv-switch toggler
Oct 3, 2004
7,293
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#25
if i worked for the show, i would try to perpetrate a huge trick on the bboys tuesday....

find a cloth that matches opie's sweatpants color exactly....
use a sleight of hand or whatever it takes to pull a switcheroo.
have jared suck and chew on the cloth when the time comes.


if it's done convincingly enough, o and a and jimmy could puke.