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Pro Tip: Make sure you turn off your stolen Iphone before ramming it up your ass

Discussion in 'Current Events' started by stevethrower, Apr 30, 2013.

  1. stevethrower

    stevethrower Got Sig?

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    Link
     
    #1 stevethrower, Apr 30, 2013
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2013
  2. BIV

    BIV I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.

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    Huh, you would've thought he'd have it on vibrate.
     
  3. Mags

    Mags Edgelord
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    Um, ew!
     
  4. BIV

    BIV I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.

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    iPooper
     
  5. d0uche_n0zzle

    d0uche_n0zzle **Negative_Creep**

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    I don't think I'd want that shit covered phone back.
     
  6. stevethrower

    stevethrower Got Sig?

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    I just looked what he went to prison for:

    Incarcerated: 12/02/1981 | Crime: ATT ROBBERY 2ND D Felony | Released: 08/20/84 (16 years old)
    Incarcerated: 12/11/1991 | Crime: ROBBERY 3RD D Felony | Released: 02/14/95 (26 years old)
    Incarcerated: 12/16/1997 | Crime: CRIM SALE CONTR SUBSTANCE 3RD B Felony x2 | Released: 08/19/2008 (32 years old)

    With those prison stretches methinks he could fit an Ipad up there... and I'm guessing NY does not have a three strikes law...
     
  7. stevethrower

    stevethrower Got Sig?

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    Hopefully it was in a Lifeproof case...
     
  8. MayrMeninoCrash

    MayrMeninoCrash Liberal Psycopath

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    Sounds like he was in the Phonepacking district or sumptin', TSSSSSSSS
     
  9. stevethrower

    stevethrower Got Sig?

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    Oh and he picked up two more felonies for using his asshole as a phone holster...

    [​IMG]
     
  10. BIV

    BIV I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.

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    Can you hear me now?
     
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  11. d0uche_n0zzle

    d0uche_n0zzle **Negative_Creep**

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    Does iCare cover the damages?
     
  12. Johnnyboy

    Johnnyboy Registered User

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    At least the owner got his phone back :haha7:
     
  13. BIV

    BIV I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.

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    I bet he puts it on speaker.
     
  14. d0uche_n0zzle

    d0uche_n0zzle **Negative_Creep**

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    Wonder how the Genius' at Apple would handle a phone like that?
     
  15. Buster H

    Buster H Alt-F4
    Wackbag Staff

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    with rubber gloves?
     
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  16. Lord Zero

    Lord Zero Viciously Silly

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    Die.

    [​IMG]

    (We really need the smiley that bangs its head on the brick wall back.)

    Edit: I just checked the link and wasn't surprised at all that this was a NY Post story.
     
  17. Party Rooster

    Party Rooster Unleash The Beast

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    Did anyone else think the writer wanted to sneak in a felching reference?
     
  18. Buster H

    Buster H Alt-F4
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    I had to read it twice because I thought he had done it
     
  19. Lord Zero

    Lord Zero Viciously Silly

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    iShit.
     
  20. stevethrower

    stevethrower Got Sig?

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    Ya I forgot to prune that line... as it made me throw up a little in my mouth.
     
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  21. Don the Radio Guy

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    Armageddon!
     
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  22. Party Rooster

    Party Rooster Unleash The Beast

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    I would have headlined the article Smartphone in a Dumbass.
    I wonder how many people will get that reference. One of my favorite early O&A XM bits.
     
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  23. Mags

    Mags Edgelord
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    Leave fletcher out of this.
     
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  24. whiskeyguy

    whiskeyguy PR representative for Drunk Whiskeyguy.

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    It's pretty obvious he planned on smuggling the iPhone into lockup because he misunderstood what "jailbreaking" meant.
     
  25. Hog's Big Ben

    Hog's Big Ben Getting ass-***** in The Octagon, brother.
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    The victim, who was at the station house to report the theft, called his phone — and heard the ring coming from Patterson in a nearby cell.

    No, he didn't.
     
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