Stutterin', Mutterin' prick

ShooterMcGavin

Go back to your shanties.
May 25, 2005
18,029
1,380
643
#1
You know how they say as you get older you start to develop your father's mannerisms? I never believed that. Besides, I'm still young. I'm 20 years old, no way I'm going to start acting like that dork anytime soon.

But today, my awareness increased 10 fold.

My dad fumbles around with his words a lot, and it's really fun when the family makes fun of him for being a douche. There was one instance in Mexico when a waiter told him, "Buenos tardes (good afternoon)," and he replied, "Buese-eh." Now whenever the family goes to Mexico, we greet each other and describe a good meal or event by saying, "that was buese-eh." (FUCKING SHOOTER AND HIS INSIDE JOKES WITH HIS FAMILY! INSIDE JOKES ARE FOR FAGGOTY 9ers!)

Anyway, today I was in Panara grabbing some lunch. While in line, my mind was elsewhere. Someone took the empty cash register and said, "What can I get for you?" This caught me off guard.

Now, I already knew what I wanted: Asiago Roast Beef with chips and a large drink, to go. We all do that thing where we repeat our order in our head a few times before we go up there so we can clearly get our message out. Unfortunately, I didn't take the time to do that.

This is what I said, and there are no typos here as I am spelling phonetically:

"Aaahhhh I'll have an ahhhhhh Asahgo ahhh Rost Bo-bo-beef with aaaaahhhh cheese, no I'm sorry, chips! Geez I'm stumbling today (As if I could cop out of embarrassment). And ahhhhhhh large drink. This is to go."

And I was doing this while staring at the menu, which made me realize this guy probably thought that I was either illiterate or just retarded.

I opened my wallet and stared at the cash while picking through it, preparing to make the exchange with as little eye contact as possible. As I received my change, I tried to enunciate my "thank you," so that everyone around me could catch that I don't have a stuttering problem. And like a douche, I repeated, "You got that it was to go, right?" I knew he heard me say to go, I just wanted to say something clearly in hopes of compensating for my awful flubbing.

:arrrh:
 

BCH

Doesn't need your acknowledgement on Twitter
Wackbag Staff
Jun 9, 2005
9,521
236
578
New York
#2
"Aaahhhh I'll have an ahhhhhh Asahgo ahhh Rost Bo-bo-beef with aaaaahhhh cheese, no I'm sorry, chips! Geez I'm stumbling today (As if I could cop out of embarrassment). And ahhhhhhh large drink. This is to go."
Sounds like you were sucking on a sour lemon. Or SirLeeMon as it were.
 

HerkyJerkyLiz

Posts below off topic.
Oct 14, 2004
3,467
1
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#4
wow travis, you made me laugh. out loud even. :haha7:
 

mikeybot

SPANAKOPITA!!!
Jul 25, 2005
19,333
3,604
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philly
#5
I'll come back to this on Friday when I can point and laugh
 

HerkyJerkyLiz

Posts below off topic.
Oct 14, 2004
3,467
1
0
#7
"Aaahhhh I'll have an ahhhhhh Asahgo ahhh Rost Bo-bo-beef with aaaaahhhh cheese, no I'm sorry, chips! Geez I'm stumbling today (As if I could cop out of embarrassment). And ahhhhhhh large drink. This is to go."
 
Jan 6, 2006
9,655
8
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#8
I'm 20 years old, no way I'm going to start acting like that dork anytime soon.
That's cool man, Shooter I like you man, you're awesome. So, Shooter, how's that Forza Motorsport coming? You should be getting out the hot bitches out in Oklahoma, you know, slapping around their titties then cumming on their faces and taking them out for a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger.

/davidg4000
 

HerkyJerkyLiz

Posts below off topic.
Oct 14, 2004
3,467
1
0
#10
this thread is now in need of bch's inside joke police pic.

Mod Edit: :)

 

Standby

Better Than [you]
Wackbag Staff
Sep 8, 2005
12,053
0
0
Arlington, VA
#11
Does the stutter mean you have trouble adding E's to words too?