What the F? Elevator etiquette, people!!!

HummerTuesdays

Another girrrrl!!!
Apr 24, 2005
7,347
0
261
On the road to ruin
#1
What the F? Fuck you to the mother fuckers who got on the elevator yesterday evening. It's fucking 5:25pm...don't you realize people want to GET THE FUCK OUT OF WORK? Don't mosey onto the elevator...HUSTLE!!! That annoying beep? It means you're IN THE WAY OF THE FUCKING DOORS. MOVE! I've got shit to do. And when we get to the lobby and one of the three of you get off, DON'T FUCKING HOLD THE DOOR OPEN TO SAY GOODBYE!!! Waaaa, I need a hug??? That's your fucking coworker. EW. I need to go to the lower level and get the fuck home!

And no, your fucking apology doesn't fucking help. I hope you die in a firey plane crash.
 

ShooterMcGavin

Go back to your shanties.
May 25, 2005
18,028
1,380
578
#2
What the F? Fuck you to the mother fuckers who got on the elevator yesterday evening. It's fucking 5:25pm...don't you realize people want to GET THE FUCK OUT OF WORK? Don't mosey onto the elevator...HUSTLE!!! That annoying beep? It means you're IN THE WAY OF THE FUCKING DOORS. MOVE! I've got shit to do. And when we get to the lobby and one of the three of you get off, DON'T FUCKING HOLD THE DOOR OPEN TO SAY GOODBYE!!! Waaaa, I need a hug??? That's your fucking coworker. EW. I need to go to the lower level and get the fuck home!

And no, your fucking apology doesn't fucking help. I hope you die in a firey plane crash.
When I go anywhere, I'm in a fucking rush. If I'm with other people, I'll keep pace with them, but if I'm doing my own thing, out of my fucking way.

I feel ya.
 

Kris_LTRMa

LoseTheRadio.net's Ma
Nov 17, 2006
9,749
1
333
right where I wanna be
#3
I'm the one standing in the back of the elevator obnoxiously saying 'let's go people the rest of us have lives'. Always works....one of these days I'm going to get punched in the mouth, I'm sure
 

HummerTuesdays

Another girrrrl!!!
Apr 24, 2005
7,347
0
261
On the road to ruin
#4
The company I work for owns the building, so I'm not sure just how much I can get away with. And if I didn't work in the 15th floor I would *so* take the stairs.
 
Oct 14, 2007
9
0
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Brooklyn, NY
#8
The company I work for owns the building, so I'm not sure just how much I can get away with. And if I didn't work in the 15th floor I would *so* take the stairs.
Start a hacking cough fit on the elevator and act like your about to hurl. They'll never want to ride with you again and probably think they caught SARS.
 

kloraferm

Humor is reason gone mad
Sep 6, 2002
31,364
41
703
Staten Island, NY
#9
I can't honestly tell you how many times that's gotten to me, which is why eventually i just started taking the stairs. (Before that I'd just say really offensive things very loudly on purpose and pretend I was completely oblivious)
 
Oct 28, 2004
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#10
i literally hate people that put their time above everyone else's time.

This happens on the subway and elevators as well where people line up and actually will push to get on while people are getting off. this is the first floor fuckers...people are leaving.

the worst is people who hold up the elevator and continue their conversation when people are waiting to get up to the next floor.

HOW ABOUT - people that wait for the elevator, get in your way, blasting their ipod (honestly it's not a black thing as you would think) and get off at the SECOND FLOOR.

it's like 13 steps.

i hate people.
 

HockeyHelmet

eugoogoolizer..you know one who speaks at funerals
Nov 24, 2004
4,305
1
0
Valley Stream
#11
i take the stairs, its only 5 floors...I hate people so the less time spent in a cramped elevator the better.