Which Religion Has The Best Backstory?

Which Religion Has The Coolest Backstory?

  • Judiasm (Old Testament)

    Votes: 6 31.6%
  • Christianity (New Testament)

    Votes: 4 21.1%
  • Islam (Koran)

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Buddhism (Fat Guy Under a Tree)

    Votes: 5 26.3%
  • Hinduism (Bhagavaad Gita)

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Mormonism (The Many Adventures of Joseph Smith)

    Votes: 4 21.1%

  • Total voters
    19

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
143,233
50,525
644
#1
This is not which religion is the best but objectively, who has the coolest history/book? Scientology does not count, because space monsters pwn all.
 

Stormrider666

Hell is home.
Mar 19, 2005
28,194
2,837
673
Bronx, NY
#2
I voted Christianity. I was always fascinated with the mythology of the Book of Revelations.
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
80,888
4,522
623
NH
#3
I'm gonna go with the Mormons, but only because you didn't offer up Scientology.
A good western beats Bollywood, old Charlton Heston flicks, or martial arts movies. Islam doesn't even allow the enjoyment of movies unless it's a video of an infidel being beheaded or a towel head reeling off a list of demands.
Of course, Judaism will win, because they control the entertainment industry.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
143,233
50,525
644
#5
I voted Christianity. I was always fascinated with the mythology of the Book of Revelations.
If it wasn't for the Book of Revelations, Christianity would have nothing.
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
80,888
4,522
623
NH
#6
Don't call the Lord of all Bagels a cunt. It's blasphemy!
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
80,888
4,522
623
NH
#7
If it wasn't for the Book of Revelations, Christianity would have nothing.
What about the Ark? Everyone likes a good nautical yarn.
 

krisko

Mrs. Fuckin Funny
Jul 29, 2005
28,300
1
191
Cupcake Capital, USA
#10
i picked Judaism because of fire and brimstone and fun stuff...i don't know much about the other ones, besides christianity and mormanism....but fuck joseph smith in his fuckhole
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
80,888
4,522
623
NH
#12
Scientology.

How can you beat the Xenu story?
Scientology is not one of the choices, you stupid hayseed.







:action-sm I wanted to pick that one, too. Liddy is a Thetin.
 

Bagel Lord

Fuck Toast
May 10, 2006
329
15
298
#13
BagelLordisaCuntism is the only religion needed
 

THE FEZ MAN

as a matter of fact i dont have 5$
Aug 23, 2002
42,989
9,834
848
#14
huh, im not a big fan of fairy tails so i have to go with the spaghetti monster
 

Dicktator

I need a Vacation
Feb 11, 2006
3,859
1,003
593
Michigan
#20
Old testiment
talking snakes
naked people
old man builds a boat that holds every species of animal
entire earth floods.
a tiny little man beats down a giant w/ a sling shot
talking burning bush
an entire body of water parts
everyone lived to be 600 years old
a man gets incredible hulk strength from his hair
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
80,888
4,522
623
NH
#21
Old testiment
talking snakes
naked people
old man builds a boat that holds every species of animal
entire earth floods.
a tiny little man beats down a giant w/ a sling shot
talking burning bush
an entire body of water parts
everyone lived to be 600 years old
a man gets incredible hulk strength from his hair
...A WWE Films production.
 

Plunkies

Registered User
Jun 28, 2006
6,050
2,804
543
#22
Those are the faggy religions. Their god's don't even have hammers. You gotta go with some kind of norse or greek mythology.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
143,233
50,525
644
#23
Those are the faggy religions. Their god's don't even have hammers. You gotta go with some kind of norse or greek mythology.
Eh, I was debating using them but I realized that they aren't really "followed" now days. Greek mythology was like the Caligula of religions. And all I know from Norse mythology comes from Marvel.

Jew God was pretty hardcore though. He destroyed entire towns for the hell of it, and then he flooded the Earth, and he told Abraham to kill the son he worked so hard for as an act of faith. That's one sadistic motherfucker.
 

Stig

Making America So Great You Won't Believe It.
Jul 26, 2005
80,888
4,522
623
NH
#24
Eh, I was debating using them but I realized that they aren't really "followed" now days. Greek mythology was like the Caligula of religions. And all I know from Norse mythology comes from Marvel.

Jew God was pretty hardcore though. He destroyed entire towns for the hell of it, and then he flooded the Earth, and he told Abraham to kill the son he worked so hard for as an act of faith. That's one sadistic motherfucker.
Lids, maybe we need a side thread with the Norse gods, Greek gods, Egyptian gods, Aztec, etc. Back before monotheism, when the heavens were ruled by gangs.
 

TrybalRage

Registered User
Aug 5, 2004
2,035
2
533
Kennesaw, GA
#25
I would have to say the Greeks. So many siblings and lovers and children between the gods, the fates, the muses, etc. you can't keep up. Plus the half-god humans and heroes thrown in for spice.