Youre Mid-To-Late 20s Kind Of Suck

Jan 25, 2006
33,621
4,413
578
Saint Louis
#1
I know there's a lot of 25-30 year old guys on the board, do you agree at all?
It's kind of a shitty time.

A lot of your old friends are getting married, some having kids, buying houses, etc.
You call one up, "Hey wanna to go the Cardinal's game tonight"? Oh, I forgot you're doing couples board game night.
Or they have to stay home because they have a 2 year old.

Another guy can't do anything all weekend because he's re-tiling his kitchen, or repairing siding.

And the people that I do know that are available to do stuff do the exact same thing every weekend.
Friday go to bar, grab a table, sit at table and drink for 4-5 hours, go back to one of their apartments and have a sleep-over. And repeat on Saturday.
If you're not a hardcore drinker or bar person (Me), that gets incredibly old after 1 night.

Half your friends are now basically 55 year old men, some are still in "College Mode", other good friend move to other states for jobs, etc.

And like that episode of "Always Sunny" there's no structure in place to making new people.
I'm gonna start handing these out.

 
Dec 4, 2010
3,596
2
0
Glassboro, NJ
#2
Yeah I kinda get this depressed feeling seeing friends or just seeing old classmates on Facebook living the American dream. House, wife, kids, etc. I just get this shitty feeling in my gut that everyone is growing up and I'm just stuck in the same place.
 
Jan 25, 2006
33,621
4,413
578
Saint Louis
#3
Yeah I kinda get this depressed feeling seeing friends or just seeing old classmates on Facebook living the American dream. House, wife, kids, etc. I just get this shitty feeling in my gut that everyone is growing up and I'm just stuck in the same place.
Yeah, it's kind of that, but in reality that's not really what I want.
It's just kind of this idea that you're "supposed" to do that. Like if you run into someone from high-school somewhere with like a little 2 year old, it's fucking weird.

... "Oh, we'll me and my wife just bought a house, and we're on our way to Disney World next week, blah blah blah."
"What are you up to?"

"Well, I'm getting this coffee, and then I'm going to go home and play XBox or something..."
[Awkward Silence]
"Sounds good, later"

It's like a transition age, and if you're not going that route, you kind of feel like an asshole.

My Brother/Roommate does the whole leave on Friday, drink and pass out all weekend, come home Sunday night routine. And it just seems so boring; But if you're not into that, you're in the 5% that doesn't, thus you sit at home fucking around.
 

Konstantin K

Big League Poster
Aug 25, 2010
15,776
3,875
273
#4
I'm 28. It was weird seeing all my friends get married around the same time a couple years ago. But I'm really not in any hurry to join them, the thought of starting a family is almost repulsive to me at this point. I'm really selfish with my time and I'm enjoying just doing the things that I enjoy. I still keep in touch with 3 or 4 of my closest friends on a pretty regular basis and that's good enough for me.
 

Konstantin K

Big League Poster
Aug 25, 2010
15,776
3,875
273
#7
Like if you run into someone from high-school somewhere with like a little 2 year old, it's fucking weird.
The other day I saw one of those little roadside political signs featuring the name of someone I went to high school with. I guess he's running for some piddly office. That kinda fucked with my head for a bit.
 
Dec 4, 2010
3,596
2
0
Glassboro, NJ
#8
Yeah, it's kind of that, but in reality that's not really what I want.
It's just kind of this idea that you're "supposed" to do that. Like if you run into someone from high-school somewhere with like a little 2 year old, it's fucking weird.

... "Oh, we'll me and my wife just bought a house, and we're on our way to Disney World next week, blah blah blah."
"What are you up to?"

"Well, I'm getting this coffee, and then I'm going to go home and play XBox or something..."
[Awkward Silence]
"Sounds good, later"

It's like a transition age, and if you're not going that route, you kind of feel like an asshole.

My Brother/Roommate does the whole leave on Friday, drink and pass out all weekend, come home Sunday night routine. And it just seems so boring; But if you're not into that, you're in the 5% that doesn't, thus you sit at home fucking around.
I actually want the house with the perfect yard that I tend to every weekend and the wife (not really the kids) I get uncomfortable because I feel like a teenager every time to talk to an old friend who has that stuff.

I work with a lot of people that go to Rowan college as well. That used to bug me until I realized that most of them had already gotten the degree they wanted but were still taking classes because no one wants to hire them and they can't afford to start paying on their student loans. I went from kinda envying them to realizing that it must be terrifying to have all that debt on top of you (that you continue to add to to postpone paying it) and no opportunities to use that degree to pay it off.

I kinda hate how Opie dismisses college but he does have a point when it comes to talking about how it makes you start your life with a huge burden on your shoulders.
 

Chino Kapone

Yo, whats wrong wit da beer we got?
Jun 10, 2005
16,959
2,196
608
#9
I'm right there with you bro. It sucks to see all my old roommates and drinking buddies in serious relationships, getting married, buying homes and moving on with their lives. Like you said, living the american dream. It's not like they are shoving it in my face, it's just always out there.

I can't trust women, so it seems like I'm kinda stuck in that phase of just sitting around, almost like I'm waiting for something to happen. I just keep meeting new people who are like me and just want to get hammered and meet bitches. I almost feel bad that I don't have kids just so my parents can be grandparents.
 
Dec 4, 2010
3,596
2
0
Glassboro, NJ
#11
Its like a transition period. I miss being a teen and having a carefree life but I also have the desire to be established in my life and not have to worry about the future. I'm not talking about being rich but the idea of being able to go out to dinner or buy something I want without having to crunch the numbers first or just the simple idea that if the car breaks down I could without having to worry about the money call the tow truck and get it fixed.

I guess the financial stability is what I want the most and that's what I see when I look at someone I know with the house and the two cars even though they are probably living pay check to paycheck just like me on a larger scale.
 

Boratfan

Registered User
Oct 4, 2004
1,360
1
0
Port Jeff Station NY
#12
I just turned 30 a few days ago.. But I guess my life is where it needs to be.

I just had my first kid, I own a nice house in the burbs, I have a great dog, a loving wife, and a pretty good job.

On the other hand one year ago... I was unemployed, struggling to pay my mortgage, struggling trying to conceive a child, and semi close to my wife kicking me out of the house because she didn't realize its tough to find a good job in this economy.

What a difference a year can make in ones life.
 
Aug 11, 2005
27,637
4
51
#13
I just turned 30 a few days ago.. But I guess my life is where it needs to be.

I just had my first kid, I own a nice house in the burbs, I have a great dog, a loving wife, and a pretty good job.

On the other hand one year ago... I was unemployed, struggling to pay my mortgage, struggling trying to conceive a child, and semi close to my wife kicking me out of the house because she didn't realize its tough to find a good job in this economy.

What a difference a year can make in ones life.
Well guess what, your dog going to die , your wife is going to get old and your kid is not going to meet your expectations.
 

JonBenetRamsey

well shit the bed
Aug 30, 2005
17,433
8,792
693
woodland critter christmas park nj
#14
i'm 28, unemployed, live in a dude house with a friend and someone else i can at least get along with. it fucking blows not knowing wtf you're doing with yourself. i guess it's time to take a shot at one of those dream things before giving up and settling for shit.
 

lockjaaaaww

All out of Bubble Gum.
Apr 26, 2008
15,454
75
188
bohemia, ny
#16
I'm in my early 20s (22) and I know plenty of people who have kids that are around my age and one of my friends is already getting married. Jokes on him though because he's already flat broke from and just refuses to go the cheap route.
 

LiddyRules

I'm Gonna Be The Bestest Pilot In The Whole Galaxy
Jun 1, 2005
143,058
50,481
644
#20
I'm 28. I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing and I'm very much miserable about it. Though I've always been miserable, so I'm probably not the best person to ask. On the one hand, I do like not wanting to settle down/not feeling required to settle down, but on the other hand, I feel like I'm wading in the middle of the ocean with nary a clue of where to swim towards. Though I do work and support myself and have started paying back my college loans, though I can never shake this constant feeling that my financial state is ridiculously unstable and I will (not can but will) lose everything I have and be back at square none. I have no idea how to utilize what I can for a better tomorrow because I don't know what would be my better tomorrow. I never want to get married, I don't want to have kids, the idea of living in the suburbs again sickens me, I don't really have any sort of feasible career in mind, and I can't not believe that I'm an overall incompetent boob who has somehow convinced employers that I'm not actually retarded.
 
Aug 11, 2005
27,637
4
51
#22
Just be a UPS man .

You get exercise AND you get to fuck all the lonely housewives when their

husbands are at work.

I did it, lotta laughs
 
Dec 2, 2005
715
27
473
Missouri Valley, Ia
#23
I am 35. Looking back to when I was 19 or so, I thought the mid twenties age would be parties and naked women fucking them and going home and starting all over the next weekend. It was not like that for me. AT ALL. Now when I look back to my mid twenties I finally understand that now I am an adult. And I am glad.

When it hit me that I was now an adult, I relized that I am having more fun now than I was then. (of course, there are still not many naked women nor is there a whole lot of fucking but whatever. I have a good job, a house and better friends.)

I have no idea why I just posted this. It felt good to type it and mean it, I guess.
 

VMS

Victim of high standards and low personal skills.
Apr 26, 2006
10,309
2,650
586
#24
I think what Absolutely is dealing with is not being satisfied with either of the two alternatives in front of him. He wouldn't be happy getting smashed on the weekends like a kid, but he's not ready to grow up yet and get married.

So? Be happy. Do whatever it is that makes you happy, as long as you're not fucking up your job/career being happy.

I'm in my mid-to-late 30s (that's the first time I've accepted that being 36 is in that bracket).

I make a good living, but I wouldn't call being a landlord a "job". I put in maybe 10-15 hours a week of half-assed home repair (just not always my home), and spend the rest of my time sitting on my ass. I'm half-heartedly looking for a 9-5 job, just to get me off my butt and to "get ahead" rather than just "staying even/getting a little ahead", but my living standards are pretty high, too. I'm seeing a crazy-hot girl 12 years young than me, and she's got a great kid who thinks I'm awesome. Because I am.

When I was in my late 20s, I was pretty much where I am now, but without the chick.

So I've got the Great American Dream and then some. I should be thrilled. And I have zero fucking direction in my life. I'm bored, I'm annoyed with shit all the time, and while it's not a competition a lot of the friends that I had a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuge "lead in life" on when I was in my 20s have caught up and in some ways have passed me. I was the first of my circle of friends to own my own house. Now some of them have nicer houses than I do. That doesn't matter to me: not really. But I know it's there.

My problem is that I believe I have a massive toolbox of abilities. I'm damned good at a lot of things. But I'm a lazy motherfucker who just does enough to get by. I get by well, don't get me wrong, but I know I could do a lot more and I'm not really tapping that potential.

This has happened to me before. When I'm feeling like this is when, in the past, I started a new business or a new project, put in 100 hours a week on it for two years, built something, and then coasted for a few years after that. But I've got the chick and this little pseudo family now, and I don't think I can do that any more. Not to mention that the economics are bad for something like that right now... Which is why getting a 9-5 working for someone else is the alternative, but then I'm "just" doing it for the money. Nothing wrong with that, but it's not what I've done in the past.

Do any of you guys get/remember that feeling when you really, really run hard. Not the aches and pains and all that crap that comes with age, but when you're a kid and running really hard for just a little while made you feel like you were flying? When you were at your maximum effort, not jogging or going for distance, but really just putting yourself at full speed and feeling the wind rushing past your ears? That's what it feels like for me when I'm really hitting a new business/project hard.

I need to find something and reconcile myself to it. Either a 9-5 or another business/project that may cost me this relationship.
 

VMS

Victim of high standards and low personal skills.
Apr 26, 2006
10,309
2,650
586
#25
I might have posted something about this before, but does anybody else listen to Rogan's podcast? I know they play it on XM/Sirius, of course, but there was a show a couple of weeks ago (with Duncan?) where Rogan got into it that we don't have any coming-of-age rituals in our society. Those people in the jungle make their boys put on gloves with bullet ants in them to become men. We don't have anything like that.

There's nothing that tells you, "Today, you are a man." Maybe if you're Jewish and your bar mitzvah, but that's not real. It's not like you really get treated like an adult afterwards. You're still a kid.

I'm 36 years old, and everyone thinks I'm younger than my 33 year old sister. Including my cousins, who remember us when we were kids. Because I still act like a kid.

Shit, I bought an XBOX 360 just a few months ago. What kind of grown man buys that for his own use, not so his kids can play video games?