Zimbabwe Is Down to Its Last $217

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
#1
Does the U.S. even have $217?

Zimbabwe Is Down to Its Last $217
By Adam Clark Estes | The Atlantic Wire – 3 hrs ago



There are cash-strapped governments, and there are broke governments. And then there's Zimbabwe, which, after paying last week's government salaries, has just $217 in the bank. No, we didn't forget any zeroes to the end of that figure. Zimbabwe, the country that's home to some of the world's largest plutonium and diamond reserves, is literally as rich as a 14-year-old girl after a really good birthday party. The country's finance minister admitted as much in a press conference on Tuesday. "Last week when we paid civil servants there was $217
in government coffers," Tendai Biti told reporters. "The government finances are in paralysis state at the present moment. We are failing to meet our targets."​
So it seems. However, Zimbabwe is hardly a stranger to financial hyperbole. The economy started to come apart at the seams in 2000, when President Robert Mugabe seized the land of over 4,000 white-owned farmers, effectively dismantling the country's agriculture industry. Over the course of the next decade, the country spiraled into an extended period of hyperinflation, the likes of which the world almost never sees. It peaked in August 2008, when inflation reached 11,200,000 percent and economists around the world started to say that the country's situation was hopeless. Prices were doubling by the day, and the government had to print 100 billion Zimbabwean dollar notes. The following year, they went ahead and printed Z$100 trillion notes, just before deciding to chop 12 zeroes off of the currency. A new coalition government formed that year began the long process of recovery, a process that is clearly going to take a little longer.​
It's unclear how the Zimbabwean government is going to get itself out this fiscal mess, but whatever it does, it needs to do it quickly. As Quartz's Tim Fernholz points out, Zimbabwe is looking at $104 million bill for its upcoming election and dealing with brand new allegations that government officials have been running a corruption ring around the country's diamond mines. The country obviously desperately needs a major change. "But action against corruption probably won’t come until the end of Mugabe’s reign, and a new constitution coming up for a referendum this spring—presuming the funds can be found -- might set up the aging autocrat for another term in power," writes Fernholz.​
Until then, looking for quarters under the couch isn't going to cut it, so Zimbabwe is doing the only thing it can do. "We will be approaching the international community," Biti said. You'll never guess who's most likely to come to the rescue. Hint: They're big fans of rare minerals.​
They are spending money like they are..erm...I can't remember. What's the type of rich I'm thinking of?​
 

mikeybot

SPANAKOPITA!!!
#2
The economy started to come apart at the seams in 2000, when President Robert Mugabe seized the land of over 4,000 white-owned farmers, effectively dismantling the country's agriculture industry
You don't say...
 

fletcher

Darkness always says hello.
Donator
#3
$217 US dollars? No problem, with the conversion rate that is like, 120 trillion Zimbabwe whatevers.

Edit: aaand that was covered in the article. I should probably read the whole story before trying to make a lame joke.
 
#7
I suggest they try trading. Spend the $217 on something, find someone looking for that item and swap it for something more valuable. Keep doing that until they have something worth $140 million and their money woes will be over. There's a TV show where 2 guys do it all the time, so it must be real and very easy to do. :)
 

BIV

I'm Biv Dick Black, the Over Poster.
#8
I suggest they try trading. Spend the $217 on something, find someone looking for that item and swap it for something more valuable. Keep doing that until they have something worth $140 million and their money woes will be over. There's a TV show where 2 guys do it all the time, so it must be real and very easy to do. :)
Or they could try not acting like ******s.
 

Mother Shucker

I'm over here now.
#10
Um, isn't our government TRILLIONS of dollars in debt? I would take a $217 profit any day.
 

Creasy Bear

gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh
Donator
#12
The economy started to come apart at the seams in 2000, when President Robert Mugabe seized the land of over 4,000 white-owned farmers, effectively dismantling the country's agriculture industry
The wonderful peace and prosperity that can be achieved when native peoples toss off the yoke of globalist exploitation and oppression.

Right, Kirk?
 
#13
It seems to me that the richest 1% of Zimbabweans aren't paying their fair share. They have literally tens of dollars in the bank and they hoard it instead of redistributing their wealth.
 

Norm Stansfield

私は亀が好きだ。
#14
Does the U.S. even have $217?
Yes. The US federal government has property that's probably worth trillions. It also has the power to tax a nation that produces $17+ trillion/ year, at will.
 

d0uche_n0zzle

**Negative_Creep**
#15
I'll give them two hundred and fifty US dollars to take over the place.
 

Lord Zero

Viciously Silly
#18
Zimbabwe could really use an email from Nigerian royalty right about now.
 

KR1288

Registered User
#19
Spent the last of it on Newports & Scratch offs. Not great planning.
 

Hudson

Supreme Champion!!!!!
Donator
#20
Yes. The US federal government has property that's probably worth trillions. It also has the power to tax a nation that produces $17+ trillion/ year, at will.
I must be being obtuse here....what?
 

Neckbeard

I'm Team Piggy!
Donator
#22
$217 US dollars? No problem, with the conversion rate that is like, 120 trillion Zimbabwe whatevers.

Edit: aaand that was covered in the article. I should probably read the whole story before trying to make a lame joke.
Yeah, after 100 trillion dollar denomination "zim dollars" were being literally used as toilet paper, the country went back to using the U.S. dollar.
 
Top